We duz ‘paw-van’. Is staterly walkunz kinda ‘prceshunal” dance frum da longs time agoes…. Findz it in da seben hunners, Iz tink…..

Gibben dat teh madleyebraireeyan iz nawtfurst, mebee we shuld does teh Stikanbukkit dans (solawng az we doez it kweyeitlee, ov kors)

Nise jowb TML!

I’m doing the Dewey Danse.

*wiggle wiggle shush shush*
*wiggle wiggle shush shush*
*wiggle wiggle shush shush*

Shurlee teh Deweydans goez like dis:

*Wun Too Free Fawr*
*Noyzee peeple owt teh dawr*
*Fiyve Siks Sebben Ayt*
*Lotsuv fynes f teh buks ah layte*

[iz a lyn-dans sortuv fing]

Oar:

*Wun Two sebben Point three two foar*
*Noyzee peeple owt teh dawr*
*Fyve Three Fyve Point Two Two Ayte*
*Lotsuv fynes f teh buks ah layte*

… cuz it’s teh Dewey Decimal system, yeh?

Congrachumalayshuns, TML

*in hushed tones*

Well dun TML. Rjoo feelin bettah now?

*fans TML wif catalogue*

BTW Eleanor, ai has been waytin 4 a lawng teim for sumwun to suggest a pavane. Klassy!

Much better, thankee. An thankoo, everyboddy, for teh spectaclar danse!

*eyes anny fanning wif catalogue*

Uh… you DO know we went digital and you are waving a whole computer??

*ducks*

Oh! So that’s why mi arms hertz!

*Gasp*
What hapened to ur Misterkitteh?

Fortshunately he survived teh experiens - ai went running owt shrieking onlee wareing a denim shirt (!! ai was gettin into bed) an managed to separate them wiv teh halp(??) ov the goggies owner - hoo disappeared. I got Mister(who looks just liek teh Rorshak kitteh but wif a wite bellie) to the emergensy vet and he had himz butt stapled bak together. (owies) At first ai was skared himz bladder had been torn, but it wasn’t. An forshunately himz alreddy tutored or he wud hav lost those as well!. Thank G-d as ai sed, he put up a spirited fite or he mite have been ….. well, enewai he wasn’t an after a stai in hospital were teh nurses fell inluv wiv him, he cam hom ok. An his poynty ens grew bak too.

Whew! Fanku for asking,thats verri kind.

sew glad Misterkitteh okay naow. My Baggy also attak bi staffi and mannies brokns bones, but he okay naow. Goggie owner neber come rownd to see. Goggie hab mannie bludz tho, cuz of Baggy pointy endz.

*purrs frum Baggy to Misterkitteh*

pittybulldoggehs get bad rep. mah son’s doggeh Meri, so sugar, so sawft, very sawft mouf, neber grab tweat fum hand. terrified of kitteh (as shud be). bootiful gurl. but makk hard for him find rental house cuz has “vicious” doggeh. plz. just meet her, kthx. sheesh.

happy dance for misterkitteh, survivor!!!

Aim glad bote kittehs survived ok. A lot ub doz bad goggies aren’t pure pitbull..dey offen crozzes wid udder breeds, offen boxers or dalmashuns.

Ef ai had tu confront one ub deez, ai wud taek along some bleech, or ammonia, or at leest detergent. OVen cleaner spray mebbe. Sumtin laik dat. Shoot it in goggie’s face to maek let go. Mait du serious damage, but ai’d risk it. Sum ub deeze goggies amoze impossible to fait awf. Hard part wud be not getting stuff on victim. Mebbe try to drop jacket or sumtin on vickim (wheder aminal or hyoomin.) If owner der, he haz tu count ub tree tu get hiz dog off.

Ai med a liddle pitbull goggie dat sumeone had traied to maek vishus, and poor lil guy was juz scared to deff! No vishus bones or cell anyware on him. Forshunadelee, he had been rescued. Dey say wen dey get him, he wudnt get off de floor. He was at rescyou event, and waz berry shai ad first. Handlers sed didnt no wad wud du, but goggie lick mai hand. His tail was clamped. Lader, he waz plain wid udder goggies an awl waggie. He got adobbted an sumeune got a wunnerful yung goggie!