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Cheezburger Network Blog
Kitteh iz pissed about something……
he shuld be grateful. he at leest haz a hed.
teh udder kitteh no has hed.
Waz wunderin wats happind to hed of udder kitteh! Purrhaps waz eetin bai furst kitteh??
or maybe babee-doll nommed teh kittehz hed B4 teh kitteh cood ete him.
Ai dond plai wid headlezz beins eeder!
Maybe kitteh is pretending to wear a straight-jacket…..
I fink they was playin a game an dis liddle kitteh kept loozin an now heez poutin.
“He wun cuz he CHEETED!”
♬
Everybody hates me, nobody loves me
I’m gonna eat some worms…
♬
an die…
fat wuns roun wuns liddul biddy skinneh wuns fink I’ll eat sum wurms
Ai used tew heer it az:
Nobuddy lubs mee
Evrbuddee haytes me
Tink ai’ll go eat wurms
Big fat joosy wuns
Liddul skinny crawlee wuns
See hao dey wiggul an’ skwurmz!
(An’ nao I haz eerwurm…)
teh werms crwl in an teh werms crawl out,
teh wirms play pinocle on yer snout,
they eat your eyes and then yore nose,
they eat teh jelly between yer towz….
Nobuddy lyks me
Ebberreebuddy hayts me
Ai’m goin daon teh gardin to eet werms
Lawng thin slymy wuns
Short fat fuzzy wuns
Ooey gooey chewy lil werms!
Teh lawng thin, slymy wuns
Slip daon eesily
Teh short fat fuzzy wuns stik.
Teh short fat fuzzy wuns stik in yur frote
An teh jyus gose daon lyk tihs:
SCHLUUUURRRP!
Fergot teh larst vurse!
Byt teihr heds off
SCHLURP awl teh jyus owt
Froe teh skins awai
Nobuddy knoes
Hao mush Ai injoy
A hundert werms a dai!
I heerd “teh wermz crall in” dis way:
Teh wermz crall in, teh wermz crall out,
Teh wermz play peenockle on ur snowt,
Tey uze ur eyz fur baxketballz
An bownz em off teh casskett wallz.
Mai brudders uzed tu draive me NUTS widdat song.
teh vershun ai herd wuz
Nobudy lubs me
Eberybody hatez me
Ai’m in teh gardin diggin up wurmz
Big phat joosy wuns
Long fin slimy wuns
… Duznt it tikkl wen dey riggl in ur middl?
okok it go leik dis!
Nobuddy like me
evrybuddy hate me
guess i’ll go eat wurmz
Big fat gooshy one
Small slimy skinny one
one wif poka dot too
Bite day head off
suck dey joose out
throw day skin away
Nobuddy no whut it like eat wurmz thrre times a day!!!!
Rodney, hao u duz doze musickal notez?
& # 9835 ;
or
& # 9836 ;
type one of those two lines in, without any spaces in between the symbols and numbetr.
♫
♬
♫
♬
oar ef u uz windoze, run “character map” – u luks unda programs > ackcessorees > seestem tools > character map. Look up characters fur Arial
® ¶ ¥ ж Ө ۩ № ☺ ♣ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♫ ♫
schweet
& # 9835 ;
or
& # 9836 ;
type one of those two lines in, without any spaces in between the symbols and numbers
.
Mehbee taim for napp an shnorgle? Teh armz ar krost butt teh belleh is opun.
i can be furst voluhteer?
i be happeh to shnorgle teh kitteh.
Mickst messajes, I has tehm.
*Puts awn snorgel snorkle*
Cubber me; Ai’m goin in!
Ambercat! Wats a grate eye deea! Mus add to CCC sa-plyz!
Attenshun eberee won!!! New item on CCC!! Ambercat’s Official Snorgel Snorkle!! Grate way to sayv the fays wen wants to snorgel kyutesee kitteh!! Abaylabel in ur choys ob collers!
MM – ai don’t know if yoo know -
Awn teh CCC, we nao also haz NINE varieteez ov scotch!!! paws4thot has, after much pawsing 4 thot, selected tehm. It seems sum wud purrfur a bit o’scotch wehn affliked wif teh serious sports!!!
Laphraoig, Bruichladdich, and teh nuu Port Charlotte frawm Islay, Tallisker frawn Skye, Scapa frawm Orkney, Glenfiddich and The Glenlivet frawn Strathspey, Glenmorangie for a Highland, and Sheep Dip.
paw4thot added “Ah tink daht cobirz awl teh mayne bayses ob flayvorz.”
Gud thing teh CCC iz liek the majik tentz in Harry Potter, or we wudn’t be able to poosh it around so eezilee!!!
Can has Oban?
Oh, Theresa – Oban wuz awn paws4thot’s orijinul list – wich wuz a liddle tooooo long. It wuz verreee hard fur himz to whittle it down to juzt thesse nine.
If he cudda had hiz way, there mite haz bee twentee oar moar. Prollee moar. Iz there nawt sumthing there taht wud equallee soot yur fancee??
snorgel snorkle!! ai lubs eet! mowch win!!
They pulled kittehs tail
Oar maybee they pulled hiz finger. . .
Mabee odder kitteh gotz dis wun to pull himz finger, and dis kiteh nawt lyke result!
WHO is THEY? Looks like THEY pull kittehs way too hard!
Kongratyoolayshuns on teh NawtSekund, CH
Kitteh nawt pizzedawf, kittehs allus luk laik dat, iz jenet- genett-…iz in teh jeans.
Wawt kindadans yew want?
iz tink should has rushen cahsik danz . us can skwat , cross paws liek kitteh n jumpnjumpnjumpn yelll “COOKIE”. sersly.
iz tink should has rushen cahsik danz . us can skwat , cross paws liek kitteh n jumpnjumpnjump n yelll “COOKIE”. sersly.
OOPS nevahmind (in teeny tiny gilda vois)
Like this? Members of The Voloshky are the folks that do Trepak in our production of The Nutcracker. They are officially Freakin’ Amazing:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gdFayz-Rx-c
OMIGOSHIWOWZERZ!!! Ok – next yeer – let uz noe in tiem to get tikketz an we”ll awl bee at yur Nutcracker. (Akshullee – wudn’t taht bee fun?)
But seriouslee – if ai cud bee 24 again. . .oh, rite. *poof* Ai’m reddy!!!
(in a gratelee simplified vershun – oh – wayte – ai think maybee ai’ll be wun ov teh gurlz afterawl.
*dans dans dans dans twerl twerl twerl liddleleep, liddleleep, dans dans dans*
COOKIE!!!!
I fot yood lieks it, Janet. Teh onlee fing is dat ifs youze wants to come, youze proly needs to lives neer Filthydelfia in teh USA.
WELL!!! Ai haz verree gud frenz hoo liv neer Doylestown, an THEY go to Filthydelfia awl teh tiem. Well, sumtimes, eneway. An ai haz moar gud frenz hoo livs in Ocean City -also nawt impawsiblee far away.
Oar – maybee we just taekz ar lief savings an stays in a hotel!!! Oh – if MENNEE ov us went, wee cud haz a groop rate – sav sum munnies!
an – wehn ai wuz 24, in mai fencing klass in Stuttgart we alwaiz had to “frogwalk” around teh ruum fur teh leg musselz. It wuz eezee then. *sigh*
(beginz to sing sawftlee) “Memory, All alone in the moonlight
I can smile at the old days, I was beautiful then
I remember the time I knew what happiness was
Let the memory live again
Corse – ai’m still happee!!!
gude plan Janet. : ) count mi in fur next year!
Wow! Offishally Freakin Amazin! (an that’s jus joo, Janet!)
Fankoo for showing that Maus – awsum indeed. Enny chans ov a touring produktion to the Lowry in Salford in TTI? Oar Lunnon even? I can’t see me bein in Filfydelfia, but hoo noes?
An Janet – wat a glims of joor past! “In mai fencing class in Stuttgart” How eggsotik an Ruritanian! Duz joo hav duelling scar? (jus teesin!)
LOLZ alp – ai admit it iz sumthing taht duzznt com up verree offen – an wun can’t just say it out ov the bloo!!!
Due to sum odd circumstances, ai hav dun menee thingz in mai lief taht purrhapz seem – out ov teh ordinaree, fur lak ov a beddr werd – but awl hav purrfektlee normal an unspektaulair explanashunz.
But ai am, needless to say, a wee bit pleezed to sound a bit intrigueing, rather tahn “ho-hum” ordinaree (nawt taht there’s enething rong wif dat!)
trepak? iz dat liek wen joo hafta shair yur sody pops wit brudder n onily gets haf of um?
*headdesk*
Welllll… sorta. “Trepak” is teh Rooshin fer “caramel” (or “treacle” for teh peeps frum TeenyTinyEngerlands. Heers teh moosic. I hoeps yoo can plays it:
http://www.classicalmidi.co.uk/music2/nutcrkr4.mid
Hm. I has nebber herd Teh Nutcraker plaid on teh acordion before.
Sry. Iz a bad Midi. Yoo gets wut yoo pays fer…
Oh doctorcat an Maus – hau cud ai nawt bee happee wif frenz liek yoo. “accordion!!”"
*falling awn floor, kneeslapping guffawing!!* “bad midi!!!* Ai can’t breethe!!
Oh – *gasp* ai haz teerz in mai ayez!!!
OK – Ai’ll wayte a wile befoar ai playz taht again!!
Fanks agen Maus. Ai rmemebers this dans being called “Rooshan Caramel” wen Ai was a kid. (joo noes, liek teh “Arabian Cawfee” oar teh Spanissh danss standing foar choklit. Nevvah new teh reel Rushan name.
An Ai is going to see teh Nutkraker balley on 2/2 an luking foarward to it. Verry mush!
Is berry fast accordion. Is inneresting.
I nawt mind accordion if der is such freekin amazin dancin. Wowzerz is rite.
What an edificashunal site! Trepak=treacle!
iz takin mai toys adn goin hoam.
January 22nd, 2008 at 1:06 pm
oh wait. do eye smellz cheezburgers? mebbee i coulds stay alil longuh…
oh wait. do eye smellz cheezburgers? mebbee i coulds stay alil longuh…
hmmm wut haappened heer? just ignoar dish wun
bud i tought id wuz punnier dan de udder won. bud naw i seize dat twice ad meeny voters tought the furst won wuz punnier.
sew, wuld dat bee 50% moar funnyer or sense ids twiced as many, 100% moar funnyer.
i haz a brane hurt.
Allso luks laik teh kitteh is wun hed on 2 boddees. Wun boddee r angree an wun r stuk undur teh barr.
As my sainted mother says: HAAARRRUUUMPH!
Okay Cookie’s human, what’s your secret??? How so oft nawt sekund?
yeah. ai was reeeeelly cloes. i wnet to site and teh noo wun had 1 comment.
so i was berry close. but ai wuld also liek to noe hao you get nawt sekund so all-teh-tiem.
Borg-like Precishun?
GUD anser!!!! Skeeree, but gud!!!
Cookie’s hauntin teh posting, alwhays waitin, waiting, then POUNCES!
Lyke sum kittehs ai noes…
I be greatly honored 2 think that I, lowly human, had kitteh-like ways. Will now go rub against husband, then swat him with my pointy ends.
O eye lolz, wake peoples up.
ROFL!
Butt wiggle of doom.
Cookie has it!
Why do our pets (kittehs and goggies) like to sit in that precise space in the home office chair? I am alwayus afraid that they are going to get bonked, borked, hurt, etc. when we get up and don’t know they are there. It’s worse than human rugrats.
OK, rant done. You may return to your regularly scheduled LOLs.
And how cum they always on the bed wen itz time 4 bed 4 hoomans?
cuz dats were deh belongs ad beddybye tyme. uverwize, where i git mee snuggls?
deys keeping the bed warm 4 da hoomans, least mine do!
I have taught my dog that when I tell him that “I am comfortable now.” Then he can move and go back to his napping on the legs of the chair until I am done working.
Sounds grate, but I’m nawt shur will wurk wif the kittehz.
Waht IZ going awn???? This wuz under TT’s commint.
??????? An nau it iz??? Oh, well.
Janet, WP has been really weird this evening, to say the least.
OT: Scroll up to the thread Tony James started and look at the link in my post. Ai finks yool likes it.
kittehs wood see dat as challenge, to make u uncomfurtabull as kwikly as possibull.
Ai’ze usin’ awffiss chayre foar tew get arownd laytlee, wif mai borked ankul. When ai getz awf ob it, mai boikitteh Moey climbz awn an taykes himz nap awn da chayre. Ai tink he lubz it becuz it smellz layke Momma. An’ when ai am in bed, bofe moey an’ himz sistur Mina snorgle up in bed wif fyootyoorhubbee an’ me. Den aftur he getz up an’ goes tew wurk, dey snorglez wif me, as if tew say, “We’z heer, Momma – yoo’ze nawt alone!”
Hai Summer,
Hope ur ankle gets bettr soon.
I fink kitteh snorgles hab heeling power (no pun intended).
aww does kitteh wanna shnorgle? i gives u 1 (scratch oww!)
Fishykitty
Yep, inn ower haus, wee nevver play wif teh fat kitteh Purrl wen shee awn her bak. Dat iz teh inveetayshun tu get skracht. Butt if shee awn her bellie, snorgels r vary welcum!
“I aint gonna bump no moar wif no bigfat kitteh!
mawm all wayz liekd u bestest!!!
Smuthers bruvvers FTW!!11!!
u wants a snorgle kitty? i gves u 1
(scratch)
fishykitty
Happi birrfday yesterdai Fishykitty – sorry ai misted teh partee… Big wishes 4 maneee morez.
Whadda sellabrashun!!! Bigger tahn Timz Skware on New Yeers Eve.
{{{{Fishykitty}}}}}
Mai turn 4 da wee!!
Body Language… I haz it… in spades.
Corrporritt Kitteh.
Aykkeeng to sez “Y’ur fyred!”, butz
no wun willz lissenn
Uddurr Kittehz gawtz
2 t3h Fud Boal furst. Den t3h
toyz. Diz nawt gud day
Corrporritt Kitteh
coodz ‘Hmmmph!” awll dayz lawng, butz wutz
woodz himz akkawmplish?
Jack.
“Hmmmph”ing awl dayz lawng wuds innerfeers wif teh nappins n teh skwrl chazin n teh gushee fud eetins. Kitteh awlwayz fynds bettr fings to do den “Hmmmph”!
Puurs n leg rubs to jack frum Manfred n Ayla!
Hi Ceesefriens, us– us– mos tm I jus lurks, sooo fun mak me lol – how yu ar3.
Dat las pikture mk me lol – whr goggie & kitteh trd3 places. I toll a storrr3 on the las pikure, butt evone gooone to this pikture, so all ceesefriens mizz mi storrr3.
Sooow surrri3 – i sooo slooow!
Woosh Anycat, what storee! Iz can almost usuali, visib … see teh big goggeh try runz away wif himz nawt see nuffin!
Nawt to wurree, Anycat. Peepl alwaiz go bak. Yoo may think a fred oar pikshur iz long abandoneded, an yoo go bak – an ebreewun wuz thar having a partee wile yoo wuzn’t lukking.
ai am surpirzed EBEREE TIEM!!
wuz good storee- doan wurry ebrybody wll get bak to it sooner or layder.
Hai, Anycat:
U tellz gud stoareez!
Verreh vizzuall. Tao iz
exsellent Kitteh
Cheezpeepz canz awllwayz
goez bakk andz foarth 4 stoareez
andz 2 fynd noo frendz
I feenkz U’ll lykez it
heer. We playz nyse andz luukz owt
4 eech utthurr
Jack.
Psssssst . . .Jack!!! Yur purdee whyte wingz ar showing . . .an sumting glinting ov gold neer yur hed, ai think.
Janet, u fink Jack b anjil ob deth??? Ai hopes notz!! Himz b nys mans hoo gibs chin rubs to kittehs!
No, MM, despite hiz sumwut ominusz nayme, ai think he iz an anjel ov lite, full ov kindess an gud will an giving happiness to awl teh cheezpeepl.
*sigh of relief*
Guds! Nao ai cans goes to tayk lawng nites nap!
Anycat, I saw ur post about an hour ago.
Lots ov peeps go bak an reed later.
I lubbed ur storee so mush, dat I already sent it to a fren that habs Siamese kittehs
U told it bery well.
Upset kitteh lookin very snorglishus
Poor kitteh, did dey brake ur toyz? Dere’s one in everee litter, sadlee.
I werk at a dey care for hoomin kittehs. I see taht look all teh tyme…
Catbert is not authorizing your day off.
U meen, and u smell!
U full of pleh an meenie weenie!!!!
awrite, bee tat way.
I has a kwestion:
We iz lookin at a nu house to liv in. One hous is 2-storee.
I hab tis worry tat my kitteh will tayk up residenz on a stair, an in teh middl ob teh nite my deer mama step on kitteh an fall.
Shud I stay wif 1 storee hous?
Well, if u gets a howse wif a cellar, u cud put kitteh down dere at nite, or keeps kitteh in ur rum, if u don mind bein waked up a lot. U cud also get a nitelite fur teh stares.
iz verree diffcult problem– inocent kittehs causin brokin hips an such… mebbe if yore mom would live on teh furst flor an not have to go up or daon steps? But my grandma (fm whom i inherited my kittehs) stepd on tehm all teh tiem in teh 1-storee haus. Kittehs lernd not 2 b underfoot, an onlee relaxed around movin peepz after a few yeers wif me. i hopez it works out 4 all of u 2 live 2gethr…
dis ar gud kwestun. fur me, wun uv mah kittehs trais to trip meh wen i ar walkin thru fambly rum or hallwai, so i wud sae trippy kittehs ar trippy ennywers.
awn teh uvver paw, kittehs duz loooove to perch awn teh stair. so dis purroblem cud indeed arise. but if der ar lite in starewell dat cans be left awn, den ur deer mama wud see teh kitteh.
so i gess wut i ar sayin is ennyfing’s pawsible. der ar lotsa facturz in buyin teh noo howzis! gud luks.
Eye lives in 2-storee haus plus basemment. Kitteh run fastfastfast up stares alla time. But I splane to kitteh in kitteh langwidge that kitteh can. not. sit. on. stares. when. I. walk. der. Dis involve a lot of stompee of foots and ferociouos body langwidges and push kitteh down couple stares (nawt so hurts. just so makes point clere.) Dis take mebbe 2 dayz. Must renew lessons every now an den. Dis werked wit other kitteh and werked reely gudd wit goggies. So U can trane kitteh to leave stares when hyoomin comes. Well, baot 80-90 per cent. Dat may be same as hazard on wun-storee haus. Eyedunno. Awlso may need to assess if dere mama kin check stares for kitteh. Mebbe invest in nite-lite.
Or go wif wun-storee. Sigh.
Mah kittehs nebber sleeping on stares. Sleep on my foots. Run on stares, but berry noisy when run.
Gud luks.
Hao duz tehy do dat? Ickle floofy bebbeh kitteh, weighs awlmost nuffin, awl ellygant an stuff, steps awl daintee froo teh ornimints – but wehn dey runs up teh stares, is laik berd of huffaloes! Ai fink dey wares teh hobnail bootz.
I luv dis plc3! Tks-u tks-u, my frins glaz you lik3 dat tru “Tao” tail. Dat kitteh Tao got allll kinns of stor3ss, sh3 relly wz skitsooo, butt i LOL alllatim3 at ting3 sh3 did!
Sulking kitteh iz sulking.
i iz a kyoot kittah
i demandz mur snorglin
annoy’d Kitteh says, “harrumph!”
when no one notices he says ebben louder: “I SAID ‘HARRUMPH!’ Hello? hello? anyone hear my harrumping?”
Hez waitin to hab u to ask “wuts rong?” Tahts soz he can sez ..”nuffin!”
“So there!”
dats too bad for kitteh cuz i has cheezburgr for any sad kittehs i sees! if nuffin be boddering him, den i guess he no gets cheezburgr… :-p
or, “if u dont no, why shood i tellz u?”
dat iz sew channuling mai deer granmamaw!!
disgruntled kitteh is quite disgruntled
Be vrry vrry carful. Dig…disgt….angree kittehs has been known to ruin teh furnichure.
im not gonna plae wiht u until you lern to chair.
Does Lindsey and her kitteh live in K-Vegas (cuz I knows a Lindsey dere)?
mah! billy gots kopez ov Playkitteh™ in hiz kloset n he won shayr!!
THAT CAT IS TOO CUTE! HE/SHE NEEDSA TO GET ACOSTOMED TO OTHER CATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ROTFLOL!
so cute lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cat haiz no frinds! Cat haiz no hed! heh heh
oooo, gwumpeh kitte