A bigger boat
Daily Bonuf Lol* Psst. Think ur funny? Make ur own lol*whatever and see.
we needs it
picture: Thomas P. Peschak
lolcaption: ltwftw
« Previous You lied to me. | o hai Next »
» 133 Comments
Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.
news from 
Contact Us
-
Who be Talkin'
AfriCat on I iz in ur space-time continuu… Zekermeme on FIZICKS kafleenthedonkey on YOU GOT ME RIBBONS!! kafleenthedonkey on YOU GOT ME RIBBONS!! Lungdoc on I iz in ur space-time continuu… Kiya on Dis iz as far owt of bed caramelchef81 on I iz in ur space-time continuu… Lungdoc on I iz in ur space-time continuu… HistoryMaker on I iz in ur space-time continuu… caramelchef81 on YOU GOT ME RIBBONS!! Grantski on YOU GOT ME RIBBONS!! caramelchef81 on I iz in ur space-time continuu… Lungdoc on I iz in ur space-time continuu… caramelchef81 on I iz in ur space-time continuu… PootyTat on I iz in ur space-time continuu…
And whut happened to the surfer dude?
Water skiing shark says “Faster, dammit! You have to go faster!”
While rest of the USA watches American Idol, giant shark leisurely eats snack, then spits out rubber residue.
giggggglol! teh kittehs out fur revenge in previous pages (e.g. kitteh in shnow, kitteh with santa hats, funnee haircutz, clothes…) are singing
row row row yur boat
gentlee down teh streem
throw the hyooman oberboard
listen to im screem!
Doze kittehs, tehy like tehre revenje…
I iz amayzed by yor lyricism.
hey, i just stoled it frum the kittehs.
you know, teh ones singing in my hed
(wanders off aimlessly, humming unidentifialbul toon)
awwww fanks for dat eerwurm….. aggggghhhh
deer turtlol,
yore welcome.
lub frum,
mary 0 adn teh kittehs in hur hed.
Mary haz givz me teh giggles wit dis ryme.
Holy gamoly, Cookie’s Human, u iz nawt second and nawt nawt second (dat wud be nawt fird?) and nawt nawt nawt second (aka nawt forf). Dat gotsta be sum kinda rekkerd.
Fur u I duz teh Swim. Reely fast.
CH, joo is on a lolroll.
Kayakers r frends.
Not fuuds.
Not this day, to this shark.
Maybe, if he’s lucky.
Shark jus wants to say hai.
[:
And get petted on the head, perhaps, like big wet kitteh…..
Sharks:
Teh new lolcats of teh ocean.
They eet tuna .. not need cans.
Maybe he just wants a nice ride in the nice boat with the nice fisherman.
Fisherman says, “Do I get a vote in this??????!!!!!!!??????!!!!!”
mebbee hee juss wunt too say “Tag, you’re it!!!”
(enneeboddee can membur dis? Wuz a monstur chasin sumwun….wuz cartoon?)
mite ov bin Animaniacs – woz Wakko, filmd in blak an wite, loks lyke horer muvi. Kamra vyoo chas he opstaar, donstaar, al rown til he trapt an cowrin een a kornr, den sumfing tuuchs him, an is Dot, an sez “Tag, you’re it!” I kant fynd de schtoopt fing on uutuub rite nau. sories.
petting sharky-skin-hed iz lyke been likked by a kitteh tong, only more so.
So .. inside-out tongue-cat.
: D
Onele hab one pointey end — bud dat one a duzzey.
OOO000oooo…..dat’s juss purrrekt! A Hai-fisch is a shark auf deutsch!!
Fischy sez Hai, peepz!!! Ich bin ein Hai!!! (grate whyte sharky)
Sehr gutt kitkay, sehr gutt!
Mir scheint es, mein lieber Herr paws, dazz dein (ok?? wir duzen uns jetzt?) Deutsch doch nicht so ganz vergessen ist!
weiss du bescheit, meine liebe Janet, (geht bei uns auch da Duzen?), dass paws ein “Herr” ist? Vermutlich kennst du ‘Paws’ etwas besser als ich ihn kenne.
No, I iz defin8lee mayl and strayt!
LOTR meets Finding Nemo FTW!
EEeep!
Predutur predut-ing.
an Prey iz praying…
Shark: need a bigger boat – this feller jus a snack
Fella: need a bigger boat – to distract sharkey
i sense much fail for teh fishermans.
Mebee hyoominz iz lukee an it B Shurman….
Awlthoah…dis donut luk liek Sherman’s Lagoon…
Steven Speelburger kitteh sez, “told u.”
Mmmmm…crunchee on teh outside
and a chewee center.
Haifisch sez: me also like inflaty-able kai-acts, wiff teh marsh-mallow-y outer layer–mmm, mmm, mmm!!!
Mmmmmmmm snaks! mai favrite!
yesh, yellow marshmellow peepz R az gud az it gits!
Deh surfrz sayz sharks tink teh yello iz cald, “yummi yello”, nd nots to bee warin deh yello schwim truncz er habin deh yello teeny biikiinii orb eeeeeeenytin’s A’TALL, elz bee teh KRonCHE nd den too mutsch bummrz fer deh humnz. Humnz not be handlz teh kronche oll tat wellz.
oh hey ….speekin ov surferz……teh Sunday Chronicul …teh famus Sanny Fransicoaz papaer, lass SUndai…..had teh HOLE top hafff ov teh frunt page ‘……showin teh guy hoo wun teh surf kontest….”Maveris” dey onli be surfin der fur a whil……but iza break wiff 30 footeded waves……an dey be thik wuns too….noawt a liddle thin wall “o watter fawlin awn u….but oh mi ggodnesssess,…..u wipe out der …….well letz putz it diz wai…..iz eesi to end up teh ded …
piccture show teh winnah flyin down teh fase ov a MONSTUR wave..an den had pages bout in latur….
useded to liv wiff teh surferz dudez….dey wer pretti, but der branes be watterloggeded…
sharky sez
dun worry, i iz nut gonna eat u
iz lukin fur mah frend george
Candygram
SNL FTW!!!
[nok nok]
[da dum da dum da dum da dum]
Who is it?
Land shark.
Go awai!
…
[nok nok]
[da dum da dum da dum da dum]
Who is it?
Candygram.
No u not, u Land shark!
How U no?
I herd da jawz muzik!
Land: we need to be on it.
an wii needz 2 doo it….NOW!!!!
U can’t alwais get wat u want
But iff u tri sumtiems, well u mite find,
U get wat u need.
hue-man sez 2 schark: Yer needz R knot relevent 2 my interests!!!
“I sunged mai songz ta mista jimmi
yeah, an hez said wun wurd to meiz n dat waz ded”
Rolling Stones!
Yeah!
momcat
Poopy pants.
I has dem.
FTW
WIN….I’z laffin so hard peeps is starin at meh…tanks Pint!
lolshark: pardun me, doez u haf anee Grey Poop-on?
kayaker: I dunno WUT color it iz, but I gotz it!
Sillee shark wans ta giuv humiez a “sharky-lick” jus fer fun
Humiez gunna needz nu swim trunkz
Umm…anal-retentive kitteh sez–it still NOT Richard Dreyfus kitteh–iz Roy Scheider kitteh. **sighs**
Jawz sez
NOM NOM NOM KRUNCH!!
dats shark or dats killah wail? gots white tummy no?
either way eeeep
das shark. i seen da documentaries bout dis pic. is real, is no photoshop. dat dere boat be holdin a marines biologist and dat dere fishy be saying ‘HEY! what dat dere yellow fing in muh waters?!?!?!’ he nevers bites no ones, but he most thoroughly inspects dem!
Ai fink dat marines bilologist canz haz hiz jawb awl to hisself!!
only fin stik outta water = whael or dolfin.
fin AND tael stik outta watr = sharkyshark
fanks for dat info, I awais wunner how to tell teh diff! Nowze I no!
Ib it haz eeted U, iz shark!
shark-like swimming detekted….
thanks I did know that. I just saw the white tummy and decided it was killah whael. Dorky moment for me.
Dat’s intrestin, howeber if ai sees a fin ai is gettin teh hell owta da wotter, nawt bodderin to wait an check if ai can sees tail !
yep. ai fink ai wif eberywun els on dis wun. Ifn de sharky/wayle/anyfing reemotly finkin ov eetin me … IN da warta, ai be OWT.
bein fysh fud … DO NOT WANT!!
oh by teh wai, did u guise noes taht ai kan walk on teh watter????? yup…..lerned how in Hawaii…..
was oawt ona boat wiff sum frenz hoo wer blak coral diverz……bout noon ai decieded taht ai waz gettin teh hot an jumpeded owf teh boat fur a liddel kool down swim……
ai splashin roun an enjoing teh beutmus wadder…..an wun ov dose wize guyz yelleded …..”Shark !!!”"
so ai did wat cumz naturul unner dose circumstnses…… ai screammed..den RAN across teh top ov teh wadder an jumpeded bak ina boat…..
jest in tyme to see doze meeniz rollin roun teh boat laffin lik hyeenaz……
but forgivved dem….caus ai wasnt “fish fud”
GUd storee!! Liek Bill Cosby and teh fingur-walkin ober cold pool !!
frostbyte, i no wait 2 see if dere is tael, i see fin and VOOM, out of watur i go!
kyyakker sez – Ahhhh – byootiful setting!
jaws sez – Ahhhh – byootiful setting!
lolark amuzed bah hoomin invenshuns !
peepul let mei tel u bout mai best frend ♫
he’s a warm-blooded pursun who luv mei to teh end ♫
in sharky joolea childs voys:
“Toodai on Cukeeng wif Mastur Sharkz: teh sekrit to a gud meel iz to serv it up FRESH.”
nom nom nom nom burp!
PADDLOL FASTUR
Mmmmm…crunchee on teh outside and a chewee center.
Farside reference.
“Thank God, I’m just minutes from finishing the first solo manpowered Pacific Ocean crossing.”
irony: ur comment haz it
i lol’ed
“I hadz sum tense moments along teh wai, but now nothing could possiblee go…”
KRUUUNNNCCCHHHH!!!!!
Yoo cannawt hav grate trajedee wifaut furst having grate happiness.
“Ov awl sad werdz ov tung oar pen,
teh saddest ar these – it mite haz bin.”
Kenny finally has the frequency
Australian for “Chum Bucket”
Gilligan’s Island II started with a three minute tour.
In Soviet Russia the shark jumps you.
Maybe I shouldn’t of had tuna for lunch.
“No Mr. Fish, I’ve never been to Nineveh, why do you ask?”
that is pretty out there, but I love it!!!
could not think of the word I wanted, not vague, not literary, but something…..
help me out
Yoo ar rite – Shera(kittehvet) – iz a purrfekt werd fur this. But – whut izzit? Nawt coming to mee, either. Just tikling awt ov site in mai brayne.
esoteric?
Wen Jonah sank into teh see
He cloesd his Ys an prayd
“O Lord Ai’m verree sorree
Taht yur werd Aive disobayd
If yu wud oenlee com and sayv me
Ai will do as yu command
Insted on tredding warter let me tred upon teh land
We Jonah had repentid him
Teh lord He didunt fayl
Altho teh see wus tropical
He sent alawng a wale
It promptly swam rite up to Jonah
An its jors it opend wide
Bfore he eben notissed it
Por Jonah wus insyd!
An afteh swimmin verree hard
For tree dais , if nawt fore
Bah! Amber warked awn teh “send” buten Bfore Ai finishd teh verse! Ai will reoom *ahem*
Teh wale caym neer Nineveh
An grownded awn teh shore
wherat it gayv a lidl shuddah
an it jors it wydlee flung
an Jonah caym a-stroellin aot
upon its mytee tong.
Shark: “C’mon I need your name, SS#, age, date of birth…”
Kayak: “Oh Crap, A phishing scam.”
iz teh phishing scam invented by a loan shark?
*runs away*
*headdesk*
Allz I sed wuz, “Dis fish iz good enuf for Jehovah”.
Epic fail in progress.
Shark sez whadya call a man in a boat? – - – “BOB”
Or…”lunch”?
It be reel pixture. I saw teh video long time ago. Shark no eet gai in kayakakak. Just follow. Gai pritty nervos, tho.This near cove where sharkies come adn play. Maek babee sharkies. I thinks this troo. I think was Nat Geographic. Cant find on Gooooogle. Was B4 u-toob. Beeg Sigh.
its real…
Its a marine biologist that is studying sharks. I used this pic for the outsidethebeltway dawt com caption contest about a week ago.
type in the the http stuff and www dawt outsidethebeltway dawt com then add /archives/2008/01/caption_contest-260/ on your browser Pick the link under the picture for the article
OH my.
I really hope that’s photoshopped…or that nothing bad came of it…
*makes gulping discomfort noise and pulls at collar*
Not photoshopped! It’s a real study on great white sharks. They set that guy up in a kayak to have them follow him haha he was nervous to say the least.
“Scuze me…U be knowin anyting bout da lolrus’s buckit?
full nat. geographic artical:
http://www.whitesharktrust.org/pages/mediaarticle/media25.html
“fairly tense experience” = unnerstatmnt ov da sentry!!
Check out my update to this thang: http://skitch.com/macguy/r34r/skitched-20080115-214249
Biggest banannana eva! Yumm
mai doc sed, I needz to eet moar froots! *nom nom nom* hmm, dat taysted puerto rican!
sharky: scooz me hyoomins, is dis teh wai to teh jauz 5 – audishon?
Ohhh! Noaw ai unnerstans!!
teh gui in bowt iz talent scowt?
or maibee eben rijard drifus lukking for a nu co-star?
sumwuns needs tu tell dreemign sharkey to run awais. Co-stars alwais DIE!
Do want.
And also:
Halp! I r nawt tastee or nootrishus!
rowar sez “do not want”
prity simple konsept, lulz
Surely you guys must have noticed, by NOW, that it’s not a shark- it’s an orca whale…
2 points:-
1) Most of the jokes work better with a shark than an orca.
2) Let us know when you find an edit button, huh?
nope, it’s not.
Besidez, it just duzzn madder!!! Teh lolrus iznt a lolrus, either. WE noe he iz reelee a lolseel, but taht duzznt slo us down wun liddle bit!!!
mmmMMMMmmmm
hyoomenz has uh flavah!
PS Nawt an orca. C nat geo artikul – linky in commentz abuv.
Many many thanx to bluepainted for linky to artickle. I lookt and lookt. I dint see video. Just red artickle ‘n’ video run in mine own hed.
Orca all blak and whyte. All overs. Is mammal. Has blowhole on top. Scares off sharkies, I here. But I not no for shur.
Rub a dub dub, crunchy hoomin in a tub. Pic is shark, Killer Whale is a ……….a whale an teh fluke (dat teh tail) goz sidewayz, ona shark goz up an down.
If dats not photoshopp, dat guys gonna needs new undawears.
“Farewell u Spanish Ladeez…”
I lub that part–an teh skar comparing–’spesh the broken hart…(I think you meen Jaws, right?)
lurk moar. not kittehs.
“Com bak, I jus wants u to be ma chum!”
or
“Ma fud iz rowin away”
How many licks does it take to get to teh center of a Kayak Pop?
One…….
Two…….
Thrrrreeee……
KRUNCH!!
Thrrrreeee.
Fast fud… is not so fast.
“what was that splash…….Oh…….crap…..I should not have hidden fishing equipment under my kayak -.-’ “
Mstr schark sez, “cn yoo here mee nooow?