Centipede Cat

spendz much muney 4 shooz
wait, I finks one of dems shoes is…
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: antoshka
« Previous invisible ice cream cone | Zombie slayves so hard to steer Next »

spendz much muney 4 shooz
wait, I finks one of dems shoes is…
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: antoshka
Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.

Deez MAI shus!!
Yay nawt sekund fur 3heathens!
Wuns ai gets mai tee, ai’ll danse fur yu 2. Wut kine ov danse wud yu lyke?
mmm…. well….. ai needz mai kawffee tu think ‘bowt it….
ai guess….. mus be ‘teh ole soff shu’ dontcha fink?
*shuffle step*
*step step sliiiiide shuffle*
shuffl-dee-shuffl-dee-shuffle*
JAZ HANZ!
*sings*
OOOOOHHHH YAAAAAAA!
how bouts a liddle sole myoosic ?
(jest had my Perubian Cawfee!CAN YOUTELLIAMAWAKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Go hed (’round r hawse, we say ‘goat hed’…. dunno wai… iz funneh! LOL!!)
*ahem*
Go ‘hed, Mary O – hit meh wif sum Perubian sole myoosik!
*settles in wif kawfee to here myoosik*
got teh axpirin reddy (for to putz inna eerz)
“signing” oooooooooooooWOAOOO i herd it throu teh graype vine
not much LLaama will U bee mine!
adn ob courz tehre’s teh rummber sole ablum by teh bEetles…
tehre ar plazes eye remembmememeber
in myyyyyyeyeyeyeyey life …
i love catz moar!
*whispurrs*
ai fink Mary O’s rekurd skipt-ed dere fer a sekkun….
LOL!
Berry nyse, Mary! Ai lubs dat sawng!
(whispers) yes, the imaginairee kitteh bumped the imaginairee rekord player. mebbee i should get out teh cassette taypes.
bud of awl tehse frenz and lovuhs
dere iz nooooooooo won, compearz wif you…
(continuez “singin” while lookin fur teh tapez)
*sings (berrry owf key!) wif Mary O*
Awl these pitchur hab their moments
Wif luvvers and cheezfrens I still can recall
Some are gone an some are libbing
In my-y-yyy-yyyy lyfe I’ve lubbed them awl!
izza gud fing u 2 r so off teh key…..odderwize dis sawng alluz maekz me cri, but ur vershun is teh laff maeking !!!!!
an 3heathens…….GMTA !! ai saw dis piccure an thot. “mine mine mine mine, not urs mine”
an how u doin in dis grate new yeer??????
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{salleh!!}}}}}}}}}}}
Glad to hep joo laff!
Yep, dat sawng maykes mee cri, tu, sumtymes….
Eet’s bin hard yeer, so far, onnestly…. lawts uv wurk (fisz… phiz… uhm …. a-cownting yeer end), lawts uv ‘ishyues’ wif heeven’s skuul (lawwwwng storee dat innkludes speshul ed peeps) and lawts of ee-moshuns (annibersary uv mai momma’s passeeng, an mai Albert kitteh boi, tu)…. but, ai bin ‘lurkin’ here fur gigglols where ai can, an poasting commints wehn ai hab tyme…. eets gunna git bedder, ai noes… jus bin a hard few weeks….
How ’bout u? How are fings? Startid yur nu jawb yet??
3h: Yep us bookkkkeeeeepers and comptrollers do love January, don’t we? So mannee loverly forms to fill owt with teh looong nummers. So.Much.Fun.
Sorry to hear January has other issues for you, tho. {{{3heathens}}}
Fanks, D Marie! Yeps, us ‘been cownters’ habs 2 phun tymez each yeer: Jannanuary anna March….. cuz, nobuddy lykes tu git started onna taxes in April! *gasp*
Mai sarkasm – let mee show u eet….
an: LIFO? doan git me started…. all ai kin say iz: it’ll suck the LIFO rite outta ya!!
(an accownting joke…. gigglol!!)
D Marie? Whut u du in ‘reel lyfe’? Ai run accownting orffice… ai em mush moar phun den mai jawb tytle maykes me luk!
3h – I am a comptroller for a furniture store. I am a one person office, so I do bookeeping, human resources, safety, and all that stuff. Fortunately, I don’t do LIFO anymore. I love my new computer inventory setup.
Yea! Wee kneads JCH4K to danse wif us. Her lubs teh jaz hans!
JCH$K ware r yu? Cum an danse wif us.
An teh res uv teh cheezfrens mus bee sleapin it off aftur teh majur sellybrayshun fur teh ICHC furst birfday!
OK ai danse wif yu 3H,
*shuffle step*
*shuffle step sliiide shuffle*
*shuffle – de- shuffle-deeshuffle*
JAZ HANZ!
(ai not no teh steps buts ai waches yur paws wen yu duz it – werks!)
Yer a berry gud danser, Elvis!
Jess throw sum cornmeel awn de floor an…
*shuffle shuffle sliiiiiide shuffle*
Iz phun! Doan need noe teh steps! maykez ‘em up – dats teh moass phun!
Ya haffta end wif teh ‘Ohhhhh, yeaaaaah!’ (lyke Louis Armstrawng frum teh end of ‘ Whut a wunnnerful whirrld’!! ) wif teh JAZ HANZ…. LOL!!
*tris agen after boost frum 3heathens*
*shuffle step*
*shuffle step sliiide shuffle*
*shuffle – de- shuffle-deeshuffle*
JAZ HANZ!
Ohhhhhh yeaaaaaah!
(nao ai can trewly concatulate 3heathens fur te nawt sekund, an lern teh phunn danse stile atta saem tyme!)
Why, fankyoo, Elvis! Wii mayk a nyse sof-shuu duo!
*lynx arms*
*syd-by-syd shuffle-dee-shuffle-dee-shuffle*
4 JAZ HANZ inna ayr!
Ohhhhhh yeaaaaaahhh!!
(Elvis, letz get sum teee – ai fink wii needz eet afftur dat wurkowt!
)
JAZ HANZ!!
Congratz, 3 Heathens – grrate Nawt Second!!!
*shuffle step*
*shuffle step sliiide shuffle*
*shuffle – de- shuffle-deeshuffle*
JAZ HANZ! Whooooo Hoooo!!!
An may ai joyne yoo fur tee???
(Wud enewun bee impresst to know taht ai lerned teh “jazz handz” from Gus Giordano hisself? Taht’s wai ai lieks tehm so much. Hiz classes were reelee fun.)
Elvis – ai furgotted to say. Yoo piked up taht danse reelee gud!! Yoo ar cleerlee way moar talented tahn yoo think!!!
Gotsta be teh old soff shoo
*scuffle scuff an
scuffle shoo*
in soviet russia
shooz ‘r’ us!
Nawt need munees–juss taeks yurs.
centipede cat is loooooong.
and mus tikl when crals up ur leg.
This be the only centipede I don’t have compulsion to squish.
WAT !!!???!!?? u nevver playeded teh fine ole gaem of “SWWWWIISSHHH teh kitteh ???” waz wun ov mi favvoritez……
*whispurrs in salleh’s eer* Cookie’s human sayed “sQuish.”
…nebermind…
Emily Latella, my fav Guilda Radner charakter
Emily Latella playeded “SWWWWIISSHHH teh kitteh ?” Salleh iz much bedder at ths tahn ai am!
no, JCH4K, Emily mixed up her words. Like violence instead of violins, was on Sat nite live news, very funny, tehn wud say, Oh, nebermind. Kinda lyke ICHC
no, but Ai playd “LOVE TEH KITTEEE!” is phun gaym. u hasta fynd teh kitteh bein lyke a lofe uv bred onna flor, den u mayk urself lyke a lofe uv bred on top uv teh kitteh en arownd teh kitteh, en u hugz teh kitteh, en sez “LOVE TEH KITTEEE! LOOOOOOOOOOVVE TEH KIIIITTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!” en den get up off teh flor bfor kitteh getz u wif teh poynty endz.
Ai plai taht gaym too! Mai kitteh tinks its not so grate, akchully. But Ai do it enneewai!
Fynding 50 payrs teh sayme syz is harrd!
Well, yoo sed “Shoo, kitteh, shoo!” So, I shooed.
sed it b4, sayz it agayn… one can not have too many shooz!
Centipede cat lurves teh chuck taylors.
ai lurve teh chuks tu.
an nyce avatar, kittythud.
dey iz more tastee an nootrishush !!!
Yes but are they new or old, cuz new chucks arnt punk, there owned by nike.
hay kitteh–try teh PF Flyers, dey iz gnarly retro, an U kin run fazter, jump hi-er!!
Purrfek fur teh kitteh hu canut hab enuff shoos.
more shoos—teh perrfekt gift 4 teh kitteh who haz “ebbry fink”.
i sit noaw heer…
yoo go way…
*kitteh slave sneeks out of teh rume*
kitteh sits on yer shoes so u cannot go awai n leeve kitteh all alone.
Whut ai reely want tu noe iz: whu haz soooo mennie pares ov teh sayme shus? Duz dis kitteh blawng tu triplits, du yu fink??
wen u r hookd on chucks, yoo cant getz enuffs.
an eech payre liddle moar warn dan teh nex.
yah. i think kitteh mebbe needs spend littel moar monee on better shooz
yeah! wehn I gets teh new shoos, i keeps teh owd ones fur the garden. tehn i gets anuther payer, adn the garden wons get demoted to mud dyutee. adn sew on,adn sew on…
Ai juss saw taht, Elvis! Iz mush tru, bowt ‘retire-ing’ tehm tu garden duti!
Ai du taht wif mai Keds….
an ai wiff my Avias’ but MI shooz maek me feelz lik a 10 yeer ole…….bouncy !!
an ai wiff may Reeboks!! They go frum going out in publik, to cleening the house, to mowing the lawn to wurking in the garden to MUD in teh garden!! SHOOOS – A short biograhpee!
centipede cat earnz much moneyz from doing shoo commershul.
“allryte, whoo eated mai skechers?”
Kant wait to see if it metamorplolsizs um medamurflol un… turnz into budderfly.
Rubburr andz kanvuss
help keep Kitteh coazee andz
awff t3h coald slikk floar
Kitteh yuzed 2 Napz
insyde deez feengz. Now Kitteh
napz awn tawpz ubz dem
Shooz arz gud playsez
for Napz. Windo Sill iz much
bettah, butz deez will duz
Jack.
Berry nyse, Jack! *claps* Ai lubs yur poet-tree an hai-coos!
Duz ennybuddy els see (in teh kittehs eyes)
‘Whatchoo want? Ai wuz playin wif dis here shuustreeng when u inner-ruptid mee!’ LOL!!
Yea, dis kitteh wuz dooeen fyne widdowt hoomins tu halp rite nao.
Kitteh sez “Shoo” tu hoomin.
Hoomin is lyke “duh, wut els wud it bee?”
*Kitteh shaykes hed*
*faysepaw*
berry phunneh, Elvis!
(phunny-er still tu mee: I allus wanna tippietype yur name as ‘Elbis’! LOL!!! lolcat typeeng/renayming detected!! rofl!!)
faysepaw bedder!
an yu cans tipe mee az Elbis, 3h. ai noes hao teh lolspeek gets inter yur brayne!
Wai, fenkyoo, Elbis! *teehee*
Iz berry tru ‘bowt lolspeek inna brayne!
(iz dere sumpthin wrong wif teh burgers again? oar, do we hab a LLORT een hour midst??)
lolspeak inda brayne, so tru.
True storee: I’s at werk. I’s writing. Very serios. I comes to big werd, dunno spellinks. Furst reflex: to try sebural upprox… aporoximo … upperox … things kinda laik udder thingies, and then splain what is meant. Tempy-tation verrrrrry strong, but I didnt do it. Not yet, enniway.
ne1 else have this sperience?
dis eggsperiense, we haz it
ai spendz a loawt ov time emailin……teh tendunci to lapse into lolspeek iz grate…..hav had top retipe fingz moar dan onct !!!
mee, too! An ai thinkz in it, too.
Yeah–kitteh looks jus like mah Shy wen he bein notty, which is mosly wen he awake. Dose whirly eyes duzzit.
Ai dunno, wy do old trayners/sneekers smell lyk cat pee?
iz teh portul ware teh hoomin and kitteh yoonivers tuch.
Centipede kitteh haz too manee pointy endz to count.
mah besst catterpiller immitayshun. nex i will maek mai lolcoon. moff r flutterbye? i can has mettamorfoesis?
OMG SHOES!
(Paging Stend – courtesy phone please)
These sneakers suck – can you help out a kitteh today…only .59 cents a day will help kitteh out…wont you please give?
Thease shuz ar MINE betch!
Pleeazzzz….these shoesez…u can have it all, gf
Centipede Cat wishes dat itz could have a shooz collection jus like Imelda Marcos…
Hmmm, don’t like this one so much
*ok – ial byte*
y nowt, carla?
Yes – way carla?? We wantz to know. ‘Tiz troo, pikshures can has diffrunt degreez of the funniness – but we ALWAIZ find fun thingz to say about it an generate interesting discushuns!
ok kitteh, u can haz thoze chuck shooz, but u bedder stai away from mai shooz!
kitteh sez:
mai shuz! keep doz steenkee odur-eeturs awai.
nowgowaikthxbai
Must be my ex-girlfriends cat with all those shooze.
Chuck Taylor kitteh has a many shuz
yahbutt, scenty-pede kitteh habs 100 footz–needs MORE shues!!!
i haz luvkraft onna brayn today i gess – furst thot wus “Whoa, feelyn verzhun uv teh Dunnich Horrer!”
Hoo noo dat wich man wuz not ment to no had so much kyoot!
all ur shoos are belong 2 me!
Can I see deez in bloo?
scus me, wyl ur der wud u get red 4 me, pleez?
Ai wants dem in purpl! u gotz purpl?
yay!!! go hi topz!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!
y duz da kitteh’s hooman has so many of teh same shooz?
No wun knows. Eet may remayne a mister ree fur awl tiem.
leaf…u haz got it rite…
shoes. ohmigod, shoes.
Centipedes? in MY kitteh?
It’s more likely then you think…
But dus has gud choees of deh shus.