Alfred Hitchcock presents

The Cats
whom grows in teh trees in Canadia
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: coley
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The Cats
whom grows in teh trees in Canadia
picture: dunno source, via our lolcat builder. lol caption: coley
Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.
Wagch out, Tippi Hedrinse!
dees be especial catwing cats- will fly awai soon….
momcat
Ursula K. LeGuin FTW!!!1! Wun of mah favrite riters.
I will go owt on a lim and say dese kittehs, dey tired of staying on teh grownd. Dey wants to branch owt.
Mebbe dey b resurgchen dere fambily tree!
Yes! Den, dey gonna pak dere trunks to bisit all teh noo fambly dey fownded. I tink dey be leaving soon.
I dinks tehy go in dere noo Toyolola Scion!
yU’s sooo Fun-knee, D. noo yeer’s kumin’–tyme too tern ober a noo leef!!!
w00t!
Ai tink yu is awl barkin up teh rong tree wit taht theeree. Itz plane to cedar teh kittehs is jus larch-in abowt
Bud I finks dey B pining four deer lubbed wons.
Oak-ay, yoo be fasterer!
eye wood knot say dat–yU poasted b4 mii on one.
Dey be pining for der old frends.
yesh–dat’s teh poplar ‘pinyon ‘roun heer.
Ai’m chessnut shur waht yoo meen bai that. Butt taht’s oak-a.
daon wrry, Janet, wii walnut hold it against yU
Yoo butternut.
Oak-kay, if yU pre-fir.
Acorn burl-ee stand awl de punz! Ai wood bough owt ob diz thred if it wuzn’t so funnee!
Beech ya tuit
lyfe’s a beech, aint it?
OR
lyfe’s a birch, aint it?
*GRRRRRROOOOAAAANNNNNNNN*
*fasepaw*
poplar opinon says we al outta our trees
occashunalli ….poplur opinun gertz it rite !!!
Iz had too much water, no litterbox in site, anybody got a pee-can?
Nope – nawt out yet! LOLZ!!!!
i keep peak-can bak heer to ICHC an eye can safely say yUs is nutz…will-ow it fir now, tho.
*heddesk*
*hedfloor*
hed to palm
necks chapter: Catz in palm-treez!!!
I fink dey shood haf stopd throwin moar kittehs up der to get de ferst won down. Dey just gets stuk!
LOL!
Wood u stop it with teh puns?
oh wait, what did i just wright?
AAAAAAAAAUUUGHH!!!
lulz
On teh twelff dei of krismas mai trulove got comfuusd.
An gots me twelve kittehs inna pear tree.
teh 12 daze of Christmaus:
Yore doin it rong!
Dis ony turd dai ov Crissmus. Teh kittehs day cannawt cownt!
Or mebbe dey up dere to ketch teh Frenches henz. That b wai tehy luk so sleke an satizfieded!
an roun an fatt!
wif sugar on teh top?
maypull sirup!
heehee…mai hubzbind gettid maypul surrup fr Crismus…en sum waffl mix en a big fancee waffl iyern! nomnomnomnomnom
whut tyme’s B-fast?
Yeps! Dey iz after teh French hens an teh colly birds an teh partridge an teh swans an teh milk frum teh milkmayds!
Oar att lees teh milks frum teh coaws dat awl ov shees b mikling! . . .
Hehehe
partrij was in tree… but we eated it.
Wii lubs two luuk down on yU –Huemonsz!
ICHC, this is the beginning of the end. This has to be the umpteenth old, old photo I’ve seen re-captioned and still somehow voted to the front page. Produce some original content, or leave Caturday to 4chan.
CK
hummm….*lukz roun…*
did u (cheezfrenz) guise heer anyfing ???????
ai thot ai heered sumwun b******** abot ole pitturez!
but taht coodn’t be…….we AWL habin a grand ole tyme wif dis pitture…….
aza madder ob fak…….ai been waitin to sees diz wun ona big page onli seed it awn teh votin pag…….
an it iz a winnah!!
(wishes ai newed teh stori behine it……an doze r beey fin luking branshes to be holein awl doze kittehz !!!)
Wot entaitelment!!! Es lolcats nawt free enturtanement? Sum pipples needz lesuns in mannurz.
hi salleh,
the only thing i heard was the sound of all of our paws hitting our heads, our heads hitting our desks, or our butts hitting the floor from falling out of our chairs from laughing so hard.
high five me my giant jazz hand friend!
{{{{{{{{ JAZZZZ HANZ !!!}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
‘K u gottem….
I cant heer nuttin over teh sound uv mai laffter! Dis be teh funniestest thred I has ebber seen on ICHC. Sum peeps juss gotz no sense of hoomer.
Rude Kitteh sez PPPPPPPPPPBBBBBBBBBTTTTTTTTTTTHHHHHHHHHH
Seemed tumee alodda peepl wur habin alodda phun wid diz photo, noo or auld.
Well, I never saw this photo before and I think it’s just the kind of wonderfully funny lift I needed.
Serious answer about the photo: This is a honeysuckle tree, and the cats are perched like that because honeysuckle is every bit as potent a kitty-drug as catnip (even more, to some cats). I’ve seen multiple cats perched in my own honeysuckle tree, stoned and happy, and higher than the proverbial kite.
Thank you for the answer. My curiosity would have suffered, otherwise. But a tree? My honeysuckle is a vine. ??
Saunters off to check The Net!
No, no, no, dat’s knot whut eye meens bye “catbird”!!!!
It’s a BURD!!! Feathers, naut furr!
Relative ob teh mockingbird, yU know–
*shakes hed*
Yer killin’ mii wiff awl yore maukin’, yU know–killin’ mii!1!
Kittehs sittin in teh catbird seat?
It’s beginning too look a lot lyke Crissmas–
catz on ebery branch….
1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12 kitteh kats caym
To teh kitteh kat picnic
In a tree howse
But witowt teh howse
Errr…
Sez Me Street FTW!
parking of car under dis here tree…do not want!!!1!
omg dis is my furst thot!
Ebber?
*heddesk*
kwik–kawl teh firedepartedment—bring awl yor ladders an trampoline-ketching thing-ees!
pore fyerman, hims goan to need 9 lives too
9 lives OK, bud wii prefer Cheezburgerz!
juszt dont tell lolcatburglar!
oh my lawsy yesh……..
*luks around paniking*
der’s nowai to hide dis pitture……oh wat’ll we do ??
wat’ll we do????
sumwun go an distrak herz………Yah dat’s teh tiket….
jest gotta find herz furst…..
ok its nize vu n evrifin…but howz we gets down???
well, Y doancha asx Ceeling Cat, sinse yore alreddy up so hie?
s’okay – we has a rown peepl-catchy-thingee an lots on flooof an a larj jug on martoonees; taht werked last tym sumwun got stukuphy. Jus DONUT send Lolcatburglar to fech teh kittehs owt ob teh tree!
Oh – taht wud bee so fun!! Hoo knowz what mite happen. Lolburglar high up inna tree wif twelve Krissmuss kittehs – teh imajinashun boggles!
oh mi yesss don’t it jest ?????
Gud morning, Salleh! Ai missed yoo yesterdai.
ai waz concentratin awn lukin fur a plase to lib…….ai waz aroun jest fur a minit ….gibed sum burger to teh witti peepulz round heer. but hadda stay awn task !!!
…….an boi izzat hard fur me to do..!!!
teh kittehz wer cawling …..”salleh !!!come an sees us ……u dont lov us animoar?????”
but ob corse dat naowt it……werk werk werk werk ……
gotta sai ai do startz to twitch ifn ai dont get heer a leest fur a liddle whil !!
Dunt werrie abaot us – yoo werk when yoo has to. Yoo know we will unnderstand. Indeed, arn’t we supposed to be shouting frum tiem to time – Yo – Salleh – get to werk!?
salleh, mist u cuz ov wurking and sellebrating. Great nuws about yer job. Hurrah fur salleh!
oh fank u July !!! ai is bery frilled…..noaw jest gotta fine a plase to lib……lik ai sed, werk werk werk …..
Concatulashuns on yer noo job, salleh, an menny gud luks findin a noo home! Keep us up to date!
iz eucatlypus tree?
or tree for da cutting of catalogs?
oar is pussy willow, praps!
Ore maybe a loverly Cat-all-paw tree?
(wii haz beatious calalpas in my town…)
okay gentuhlcats, this meeteeng of G.R.O.S.S. (Get Rid Of Slimee goggieS) is offishally called to ordur…
ooo, so much win!
But whum amung us will be teh diktayter-foar-lief, and whum shall be teh presydent and furst tyger?
Luks like wer wer oin fur a kold winter, Ma!
Look at teh cotes on tehm katz!
yay! teh cats has inventloled thare own interwebs!
yay! It’s a series of tube-branches!
Burd poop or kitteh poop on mai kar? Much rather bird poop if it haz 2 b 1 or uther. Woke up 2 kitteh poop on kar. not cool.
ebbery day wii wake up an wunder: whuts it guano B?
bad birds bad birds, whacha guano doo? whacha guano doo when the poo on you?
tee, hee, heee!!!
OK, wich wunna u is gonna go down an negotiate wif teh goggie?
Dat’s wat I thott 2! Wat goggie haz all dem kittehs treed? Must haf sum big teef!
Mebbeh teh plan is tu putz a bell upon teh goggie?
Necks up on Anyamill whirld:
Feral Kittehs tern arboreal.
they goin after bats, not mices now
moar fun too bat around?
srsly, i had a cat in loosiana what wud ketch teh batz rite out ob teh air. SRSLY
OMG…It’s a Lyon…git into teh tree!!!
Da burds had flavr
“Mummy”
“Yes dear?”
“Where do lolcats come from?”
“Well dear lolcats grow in a very special tree that is made fertile and fruitfull by the many cheezeburger that are used to fertalise the tree. Then when the tree has been fertalised with enough cheezeburgers a lolfairy comes and sprikles its lol dust on the tree and lolcats blossom on the trees branches where they grow and develop their lol until one day when their lol is fully developed they climb down off the tree and go forth into the world and bring much lol and joy to the people of the world.”
“Mummy?”
“Yes dear?”
“Has u been awn teh gin again?”
oh fanks SJ…….noaw ai gotz mi energy drinkies awl obber my puter screem…..
*snortle*
On rel8ted topik the furst lol cat wuz in a buk by Paul Gallico titled “The Silent Miaow” written in 1964:
http://www.paulgallico.info/silentmiaow.html
subtitled “A Manual for Kttens, Strays and Homeless Cats”. Is transl8 from orginul feline lol speak but introduckshun still in lolcat. Buk is hilarryus.
absolutely great buk! used to has it, lost in moobing, must get anudder!
Ai hab copee dat cud maight be put ub fur dopshun tu a furrebber home.
Yes! I useded to hab dat buk, too, dont know where it is now.
But I bemember it began, “When I was a very young kotteb. . .”
Cat-like typing detected.
(Mah furst kitteh, Midnight, wuz varry gud at teh silent miaow.)
I wants 2 liv in mousie’s wurld!
Dis zacktly what Iz alweighs hopin to fine. Kittehs grow on trees? Dis an embareesment ob da riches. Dips on firstest (whoops) Dips on not secnd choosin ob da kittehs.
I luvs dis time of year when Kitteh trees bear fruit. Don nom nom on teh orinj ones tho; they not ripe yet.
heh, heh…so dat’s wear kitteh’s kome frome?
We iz green kittehs and we is libing in this tree to save it frum loggers. We not gettings down till you promise that the tree no shall be cut.
Kthx bai
Kittehs saving Ur treez
diz is greet
Do what de birds do–is wut I sez!
Kitteh sez, To know mai prey, I mus bcom mai prey!
fyrefiters r on strike?
no kitteh rescyoos tihs week??
Dai awl buzy kleenin da splorches. Dis fred iz soooo fun-knee from root to branch dat da CCC can’t keep up an be needin da bakup.
wr in yr trees
defoliatin yr forests
HAH! n birds o prey think dat der cool….
*fasepaw*
The rare cat tree grows only in places where there are an abundance of cheezburgers.
- ai sai, those r kittehs rn’t dey?
- ar.
- yes, yes of course, ai tawt so…only…er wai r dey up in teh trees?
- a fair quesjun an won dat in reecent weeks has been much on mai mind. it’s mai conseedered opinyon dat dey’re nestin.
- nestin?
- ar.
- laik birds?
- ar. zactly. birds is teh key to teh whole problim. it’s mai beleef dat dese kittehs r laborin’ unda teh misapprehenshun dat dey’re birds. obsurv dare behavyur. tak fur a start the kittehs’ tendancee to ‘op bout teh yard on dare bak legs. naoi witness dare tempts to flai frum tree to tree. notice dat dey donut so much flai as plummet. observ fur zample dat kat in dat oak tree. she is clearlee tryin ta teach her kitteh to flai. talk bout teh blind leadin teh blind.
- but wai do dey tink dey’re birds?
- nuther fair questshun. one ting is fur shur; a kitteh is nawt a creechur of teh air. dey have normous diffykultee in teh comparativlee simpull act of perchin. (crash) as u see. as for flight, its bodee is totallee unadapted to teh problims of aviashun. trubl is, kittehs r veree dim. once dey get an idea in dare heds, dar’s no shiftin it.
- but ware did dey get teh idea frum?
- from harold. he’s dat kitteh dare ovah unda teh elm. he’s dat most dangerous of aneemals, a clevah kitteh. he’s teh ring-leader. he has reelized dat a kitteh’s life kahnzits of bein kept inna yard n a house fur yeers an yeers an bein put ta sleep wen its old. and dat’s a depressin prospekt fur an ambitious kitteh. he’s patently hit on teh ideah of escape.
- well wai doan u jus get rid of harold?
- cause of teh normous commershul possebilitees shud he sukseed.
Pythons FTW!
Aldow to be fayr, kittehs hav mutch better perching powers den sheeps, cors of awl teh pointee bits
Monty Pyhun FTW wun ob mi faborite rooteenz !!!!
me an mi sistah Katy useded to do dis wun a laowt……
It are indeed a beyoot.
We had a MP movie marafon nawt so long ago but its been ages sins we watched teh flying sirkusses. Mus fine tiem to watch dem agin…
OMG, yessss!!! Ai groo up watchin’ Montee Pythonz Flyin’ Sirkuz wif mai Mom and Dad. Mom dint rillee get into it, but Dad did an’ as I got older I unnerstood moar an’ moar. Laffed owrselvz sillee ober it, we did.
Must hav MP festival soon!
dey’z loawtz an loawtz ob sircuses stuff obber awn utube…ai waz gigglin at der antikz a few nites ago….
i remembers Monty Python wen I wuz a kid becauz tehy used sware werds on broadkast televishun (nott kable) and showd naked ladie pics because our PBS public televizhen station did not censer it. i was like “whoaa…”
a few yeers bak teh beebeesea amerikas had an ad wif de french lektur on sheep aircraft (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8jC7NKkjCe0) wif teh tag “if ur gurlfren tink dis is funneh, marry her.” sound advis dat.
Cud dey hab blowed upder in de lazt big storm?
Here’s a scene from Hitchcock’s new movie, which is the second in his “Food Chain” trilogy!
Kittehz in Treez.
Umbrella saylz skyrawkett.
Film atz ellebbun!
Straynjj fennawminawm.
No wun knoez wie Kittehz habz
muved up, butz dey havvd!
Syenntistz awayt
nexxt step in ebbollooshun.
Kittehz billdeeng nesstz
Jack.
Iz a purr-simmon tree, mebbe?
I r skeered uv dees kittehs
deyz makin me uncomftibbuls
wots if dey swoopz downz wl at onss and gowge our eyeses owt?
and hows cud dat triee holdz so moosh kitteh-wayt?
shouldn’t that be alfred hitchcat?
THIS PIX IS JUST PLAIN CREEPY!
o sry, did u want some birds?
we needz elevens firefiterz quick!!!
the caption should be ” First crows now this?”