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picture: Me, myself, & I, lol caption: BunnyLoo
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bearing furball
picture: Me, myself, & I, lol caption: BunnyLoo
An tehy fown Mairy an josef an teh babe – AND AN ENORMUSS JIANT KITTEH – lyin in a maynjer!
gud on U adn wat a gibnormus mangr it were. No danzin jus silent night
Tehy maed tehm big in tohse dais!
Behbehs an kittehs in teh saem bed – nawt shor it’d be a verree sylunt nite!
U rite Ambercat…sometimes not silent in dai eifer. Mai Emme likes to talk a lot when not snoozin on me lap
Dere sohm storee bout how bebe Jeezuz no culd get 2 sleep, an a stripee kitteh n her bebez cuddled up nex 2 himz and mad him cozee wif der floof an purrin. Maree wuz so hapee she kissed da kitteh’s hed, n datz why wen u look at stripee kitteh da stripez awn da hed iz shaped lik n “M” for Maree.
ai nebber hurd dat storee. fank yoo, diva!
Aww…very sweet!
wellz dat esplains da star abovz da mengerz
Awey in a maynjir, no crib for his bed -becors AN ENORMUSS JIANT KITTEH wars mownopalyzin it- teh littul lord Jezes laid down hims sweet hed
Ai herd aboud a large Natibiddy in a store dat had a kitteh. Kitteh wud trow bebby Jesus outta de manger an sleep in it himself.
LOL, beeg storee heer in LA, besydes da raynins, iz dat sumwun stolded liek a duzin baybe Jeebuses. Dey awl had notes on em whut sed “Jeebus nawt gone, Hims just nawt bornded yet! Yoo kin git Him et OLPH” (Dat’s Owr Laydee uv Purr-Pet-Yoo-Awl Help Church). Da Monseenyer uv da church wuz mistifyed by awl da bebe Jeebuses whut suddenlee appeerd in frunt uv a Maree stachoo wun nite!
4 uv da Jeebuses awreddee went home. Wun laydee sez she gwine nayl Him down so He dunt distapeer agin!
But is troof, da maynjur shood be MT until Xmas, rite? Cuz Hims nawt bornded yet!
dat is tru-i neber fot of dat!
Lol, teh nonnermus Jezes-steeler is absowlootly rite!
We yoosed to set it up liek dis:
Maynjir wif donkie an oks in teh beginning of desembur.
Josef an Maerie arribe a few days afore krismas.
Baybe Jezes is put in teh krib on krismas nite, shepards an sheeps come a littul layter.
Teh wyze men start travelin to teh maynjur on krismas eev but doan arribe til teh 6th ob janyooarie.
Elaborit krismas ritchuals, we had dem
Aive herd ub sumpeeple hu muve wizefellas all around de room, clozer n clozer to manger
sowns moer lyk teh skeery stoen anjels form Dr Hoo to me!
Donut tern rown, donut luk awai, donut blink. Srsly, DONUT BLINK!!!
Ambercat – taht waz sum srsly skeery Dr Hoo episodes!
Aye alwayz wunnert why Aye wuz skeerd ub stachoowaree, NAO AYE NOZ!!!!! DONUT BLINK!!!
Ai tink sum plazes dats cuzzomaree – mozt Catlick chuches heer v emmpee manger til Christmess.
Iz cuzzomaree in mai Looturan church too.
mai frends kitteh taeks cayr ob taht. kitteh lieks plays wif bebe Jesus frum teh nayvity seeen. she has hard tiem gettin bebe Jesus baks in tiem furr krismas. tehn kitteh duz bebejesusnappin agen. it is teh funnees 2 wach.
Wen I wuz a liddle kit, I stold teh babee frum mah momma’s nativitee seen, an lef a note made owt ov lettrs n wurdz I cut outta a magzine “If U evawan C teh babee agin, leev a can ov Planterz Cashoos by teh camel by minnite, an nobuddy gits hirt.” Momma lef can ov cashoos wif note “U R wat U eet! (nutz!)” Nex yeer, got box ov Nilla Wafers. Tryde 4 ponee teh nex yeer, but dinnot wurk owt. Momma snote sed teh camel fritened ponee away. Am not shur she reelly tryed…I seen no horseshoo pritz on teh shag carpets!
Teh star uf Bethlihim = big yello kitteh eyez!
MAH MINI NATIVETEE SET NEVAH CAME WIF GIANT BLACK CAT!!! DEY RIPPED MEH AWF!!
Oh so dats wuh Myr meens!
Ai allus wundered…
*hugs self* Oh, wunnurfull!!
Myr wuz short fer “Myr-rowl?”
Or teh weezy sounz wen teh furball hacks up …
*MYR MYR MYR …KAAACK!@!*
damn im fast ^-^
Not fass enuff, it uppeers…
*snickur*
Aye tink it ravver slo, mehseff!
Onlee aboud half-fast.
I lol’ed
But Ambercat iz faster by far.
zipzipzip!!! Tehre Ai go!
Is teh Speedie Gonzales of Ingerlant!
Pryde commez befawr a fawll
an teh kitteh sed unto dem:
“Feer nawt, 4 i bwing yu gud tidins uv grate joi
4 untu yu iz borndeded tihs dai in teh citteh uv Dayvid,
a sayv…a sai…teh wun hoo will maek tings beddur…wich is Cwist, Teh Lawrd”
…N dat’s wut Krismus iz awl uhbawt, Charlee Brahwn.
Dat an harblls!
undur da twee in mai howse!
kittehs r gud at bringin tidins ob cumfurrt n joi
cumfurrt n joi
o o tidins ob cumfurrt n joi.
stompee stompee stompee, purr purr, snorglez, purrs, curdels-ups, snuggles….gushiefuds nao?
An der wuz in da saem cuntree kittehs, abyding in de feelds, keepin watch ober der maussies bai nite. . .
fun-knee da comentz sayz 3, but whenklicked sayz none
Him bee a poor kitteh, him did him bess fur U.
mefinks poor kittahs r teh bestest. dem r nawt shpoild. dem GIBES gud snorgls, eensted ob jus xpctng dem.
lyke teh ornj kittah een mah neyburhud. him r teh stray but r berry fwendlee an’ lubs eberywun an’ eberyting.
I hadda orinj kitteh cum bai last yeer.
First he caem by in de summer an hung owt in de shayd ub mai yard whyl I wurked wit my posies. Ayd luk up an see himz orinj faec watchin meh. He wuz skinneh. I naemd him “Slim Pickins.”
Den he caem closr, let himzself be pettid. Wutta niec kitteh, but so thin! Then wun dai de beh-beh birdies in de lilac bush got eeted – an Slim displayed an unyooshual nowlidge ub de criem sceen! Himz also lukked sleek and purry dat week.
We put owt fuds on frunt porch, an a box, an a blankit. He wud alwaiyz cum over, sai hello, purr a whyl, maek niec, an den *finally* when it was approwpreeat, hav a snak. Alwaiyz vizzit furst, den de snaks.
I tawt I wuz gunna be a kitteh-mommeh agin (he wuz wyld, cuntree kitteh). Wuz awl eggscited.
Den after de furst snow in December ob last yeer, he disappeerd. Nebber saw him agen.
Lief iz liek dis in de cuntree. De annymalz cum, an dey goez. Wurst ob awl, yoo neber noes “de rest ob de storee.”
*sigh*
Aw gremlin, ai fink dat kitteh lubbed yoo. An yoo ar a gud purrson cuz yoo wuz sew nise to hims an maded his slim lyfe a liddle fadder!
(said with sad smile and absolute sincerity:)
I’ve had…we’ve had…too-many-to-count kyats over teh last 20 yeers. And is as you say, “they comes and they goes”.
Only on a few occaisions was I there to ‘see’ the “end” of the story. And no, it never got/gets easier. Little harder each time, actually…Ask any Vet how often the owner is almost falling apart when losing a furry kid! I’ve scared a couple, I think…..
I have to consider it a gift from God that they “go” somewhere before they “GO”, so to speak! Heartbreaking? My heart’s a bag of broken glass! and Meds can only help you so much!
Yes, I know why Christmas is such an ironicly stress-ful season…
Kipling sed “Beware of giving your heart to a dog to tear!” Same with kitties. They just wrench the heart out of you.
ooooooh (((((((((((((Johnson)))))))))))
hooever sed tis bedder 2 hav luved an lawst than nevver 2 hav luvved at awl…shud eat mah shorts!
“bag of broken glass” *teery eyes*
yu has friends heer J442!!! (((((((((((((Johnson))))))))))
J442 (and udder cheez-frenz):
Yoo ar so rite! Mai parints libbed (an still do lib) in de cuntree awl der libes. I members menneh stray kittehs (an sumtiems goggies) who caem and went. Alwaiyz wuz de orinj kittehs dat broked my hart de mostest.
I tuk pikshoors ub Slim, so at leest I haz doze. Awl he left meh wuz a few pikshoors an an emptee box – wit a blankit innit, wit dirty paw printz onnit. An memreez. Datz awl.
My boyfren lubs kittehs too, an wuz de furst wun to tuch Slim. We sez to eech uvver – member dat summer when Slim ate de yard birds? Den we sez – dat sowns liek a gud naem for a rock band! Slim an de Yard Birds! An we laffs owrselvs silleh.
I dinnot gno de reel ending, so I gaev Slim a happeh ending in my hart. When I tinks ub him, I pikshoors himz got adopted, an is libbin wit a famblee dat treez hims well. Dey feez him an lubs him an gibs him treetz an toys, an at Crismuss mebbe he luks owt de window ub himz warm hows an remembers meh . . .
Cud be – he mai hab had multibble plaecez tu vizzit! We cen hope so!
Ad leez, he had a fren, a berry gud fren.
b carrfool– teh ornj ones r poysin!
(must keep teers off keyboard…)
To all those whose kind words and virtual hugs have helped me get through the last few months:
May the Angels of Heaven now ride forth to do war upon all those who would hurt you, whether they be physical enemies…or not!
I, known here as Johnson442, say this!
Bebbeh Jeezus appreeciates teh furball! Jus hope Josef dint haf to step in it.
LOL!
ryt! cuz Keeng Jaymez were lerjik to kittehs dats wy left owt!
dat wud figgur.
ol poop hed.
French kitteh got confyuzed. Read about teh “manger” and thot fud wood be served.
http://www.icanhascheezburger.com/2007/11/02/pardonay-mwah-do-u-has-reservation/
Oh, eyez of wunder
Eyez of lite
Eyes of kitteh, glowing brite!
Mai kittehs always stampede lil villages in da house. The lil peeples are liek “oh noes! Godzilla kitteh ahhh!”
hymns iz looking fore teh gingerbred haus…wantz 2 nom it!
wut’s teh problm? itz juss ceiling cat keeping gard ovr bebbeh jeebus. you nevrr herd tihs part uv teh storee?
Dat part muss be in de Ap-paw-criffa. Dey nebber red dat part tu us in Sundae Skool . . .
Mmmm sundae skool… *goes to get hawt fujj*
Didja no derz a goggie in de Cafflic Bibel and de Pockrepha? (Tobias)
Der’s awlways a goggie in teh manjr
And TAHT, deer SJ, iz whw yoo ar so sorelee missed.
Dat’s why Aye diborst ma furst hubb, hee wuz goggee in maynjur…. Grrrrr. Wun Xmas, he gibd me dis rinkul awn ma forhed frum wurryin bowt munneez. Dat awl Aye gawt dat yeer. Stoopee hed.
Noo hubbe iz Grinch sad cuz he cant gib me moar! But awl Aye needs iz him. Hugs frum him iz liek comin hoem…. aaahhhhhhh…..
The punchline actually goes:
“And the cat said to the baby Jesus ‘Here kid, have a mouse!’”
Where Aye reed dat? Where da kitteh luks at da kid in da craydull an sez “What dis chyld needs… is a mows!” Cuz bebe iz cryin. So kitteh gits mows an drawps it in der, an lo, beb stawps cryin!
An starts SCREEMIN ai majin
it is sed taht teh 3 wize mens folloed a starr in teh eest 2 get 2 beth leehem. wen tehy gots closer 2 teh manjer thare was a giant cat wif shinee eyez! the giant kitteh sais, pssst, wut did u bring him? murr? gole? frank in cents? wut a bebbeh can du wif taht?? u gots enny nip?
Blaek kitteh blenned intu nait skai so naud cee him.
Teh kat ins teh skiey
Lukd down wer he lay
I fink dis kitteh is like udder wun, lewkin foar teh baybee Cheezus…
Comme, dey toll me
Meow meow mowww
Da noobornd King tew see
Meow meow mowww
I hab no giff to bring
Meow meow mowww
Dat’s fit to gib a King
Meow meow mowww
Meow meow mowww
Meow meow mowwwwww
Sew, I’ll seeng fur Him
Meow meow mowwwwww
Him, our King….
zippy – dat be fur da wynn!!!!!
elebentyseben burgurz fur joo!!!!
Fank u!! *bows* Wiff elebentyseben burgurz, Ai wull hab enuff to gib to frenz!
*gibs awl teh cheezfrenz a burger*
I yooshully doan’t be cree-aitive liek dis!
Teh Whirled needz moar Kitteh karolz.
Great balls of fur
Sed teh liddle lamb tew teh shepper boi,
Do u see wut Ai see? (Do u see wut Ai see?)
Standeeng in the darkk, shepper boi
Do u see wut Ai see? (Do u see wut Ai see?)
A kat .. a kat .. eyes shining liek a star
Waching ober Jesus, neer and farrrr
Waching ober Jesus, neeer and far….
O beeg hyooj kat ov Beffleehem,
Ur eyes, dey do shine so brite!
Abuv teh manjer u do sit
An purr soo soff-lee.
An in the manjer lies,
the noobornd King of lite!
U sit ober him wacheenglee
Eyes shynin eber brite!
beeg hyooj kat of Beffleehem FTW!
I bringz da murr ball.
Huyoik…huyoik…huyoik-HERK!!!
teh yoobikwituss barn kitteh, teh hardess werkin animule wut keepz teh manjur free ob mousees n ovver pests, dun getz eeben a liddul menshun in teh storee.
iz gud dat wii R making up so mennny songsez furr teh kitteh…he wuz a un-sung Hero!
Snagglefartz ov Breathlahem sez “yew, baaay-beh, get in mah belleh!”
Aye wunnerd hoo wuz steelin awl da bebe Jeebusis frum da maynjur seens!
…an teh Lawd reproached teh kitteh, an sent a stoopee gog too mildly vex teh kitteh for a time, an sed, “No, Kitteh…dis bebbee not fur u. Dis speshull bebbee an u muss suffur it too pulls ur tail an nom it and poke ur eers an has Hims dominyun obbur u. Butt I will not allows too much aggurvashun fur u, kitteh,….heer, hab a cheezburgur an doan powt. Gibs mee gray hairs. Kthxbai.”
We 3 kingz wure led here
by teh star rising in teh East
turns out it was Ceiling Cat guiding us
from abuve
and watching over us
as we…as we…i gonna leeves out that part
it’s Jesus Christ, find a lion and put it in the car!
OMG- Have to call in the computer cleanup crew now….
rofls! dat awlmokst maid teh coke cum out mah noze heeeeee ^_^
taht comment was inevitable
but also very awesume
HAHAHA!
much win and awsum!!
Aslan?
*applauds*
TC, UR gots cents of huumur dat nose no boundz! Ai lurfs it! An so topical, as well….hehehehe!
wen ai hads kittehs, at hollydaze tyme, dey NEBBER leaf nawtivvty seen alone. Dey tink it puts dere 4 teh kitteh’s amoosement porpoises onle. Poor Bebbeh Jeezus alwas ens up on floor or under cowch. Hads to play hide and seek for Crissmas Dey always! But teh Kittehs lurved Him, so dat’s OK wif mee.
Teh kitteh bears a harbl
As fuzzeh as a lamm
An Mary bores sweet Jeebus Kryst
To be R sweet Savor
O da risin uv da sun
An teh warmin uv da fur
Teh playin uv da merry bebe kittehs
Sweet purrin in ma bed
Teh harbl and the powderpuff
Now boff R full well grown,
Of all the timez to go to da vet,
Nao iz good to purrvent unwantid birfs!
O teh rising uv teh moon
An teh running of teh meeses
Teh playins uv da merry kittens
Sweet purrin on ma lap!
Lubz it!
Hark how da kittehs,
sweet fuzzee kittehs,
all seem to say,
cheeseburgers away
Catmas is here,
bringing good cheer,
to young and old,
meek and teh bold.
Mew purr mew purr
dat is der sawng
with plushee fur
all de liv lawng day.
Lubz dissune tu!
O kitteh at nite! Yor ayez R brightlee shining,
It is teh lite refleckin frum yor shinee orbs.
Long lay teh whirled in floofless snorgle pining.
Till yoo appeered and we felt yor sawft furs!
A frill of hope R weery fingurrz tingle,
For yonder iz a sawft an floofee form.
Fall on mai lap! Oh, let me pet yor sawftniss!
O cat divine, teh cat whuts in mai hows;
O cat, O floofee cat, O kitteh minez!
Dis iz teh BESTEST kitteh karol eber!!
Elebentytwennyfoartyfree cheezburgrz for u!!!
*cheer*
Fang yoo!!! Iz myee fayvrit too!
(Dem udders iz Da Hawlee an de Ivee an Carol uv da Kitteh Bells)
Oh onceajinx -is wun ov mai fayvrits too. An yoo haz broughted the teerz to mai ayez wif yur wonderful noo lyrikz. Awl yur noo sawngz ar – specatular! “Long lay teh whirled in floofless snorgle pining” and “For yonder iz a sawft an floofee form”. . .jeenyus!!
Onceajinx – I *lubs* dis! I wuz sittin at hoem lass nite singin to maiself “in floofless snorgle pining.” Wunderful!
Wen ai waz yung, we had a lot of wunerful plaztic aminal ub all taipes – lions, seels, hippo, rhinos – an we’d add dem to r Natibby sceen.
Ai speks diz kitteh gonna knock all de figgers down wen leff alone.
an choo an dem?
Uv cors! Onlee kitteh may has poyntee enz, so gotsta choo awf awl da bits frum da uvver aminalz!
Kittehs we hev herd awn hi
Switly purrin ore the plen
En the goggies in riplai
ekko out they glow ris strenns
Meooow, Meooow, Meooow,
Meooow, Meooow, Meooow,
En egg shell sees Dayo!
“En egg shell sees Dayo?” LOL!
Dat eggzaklee hao ma kwire teechur sed to seeng it too!
En egg-shell-Sees Dayo!
LOL!
Anudder wynning kitteh karol!! Ai am soe imprezed wiff you awl!!
Twenntyelebentyfityfoarty burgerz!!!
huyoik–HERK! huyoik–Herk!
huyoik all da way!
hurry and scoop dem off da bed when
you hears da huyoik star-rrrrrt
huyoik-HERK huyoik-HERK!
GET DEM OFF DA BED!
only ting worse den steppin in herk
is havin it on yer hed.
***ewww***
Wowzers, juss wen I thot I hab seend awl teh bestest kitteh karols! Anudder wynn! Ai dun eben knoe hao mennee burgerz to gib u!!
Fittyelebentysebbentyfoarty!
Teh wun ting werser tahn cleenin up catsik is cleenin up WARM catsik! Eeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwww!!!!!
eww. purrsonally, ai preefur to juszt let it get hard n dry…onlee taykes a day or too…tehn yoo ken juszt pool teh hole fing awf in wun peace. az yoo myte imajin, wee dunt haz mush kumpanee.
LOL, Aye did dat too. Had bayj carpit in ma aparkmint, so da catfud barfeez matchd reel gud! Cors, sumtiemz, Aye had no choys but kleen up draied wuns, ef Aye finded dem aftur a day or too!
Aye jus haytid steppin in da warm wuns. In da dark. Wen Aye gots ta pee. Sigh.
wut dis b da maynjerwe haf, and dat be da kitteh we haf naymed TaMooMoos. It be a Cristmouse MEERUHKAL!!!!
Crizmaz stori not omit jiant kitteh. De norf star wuz jiant kittehz lazer eye.
Hee jus kep outta site, sew hee woodent scare da bejesus outta dem.
Blaek kitteh blenn intu nait skai so iz harda see him. Gotta luk reel-reel cloze!
I jus hope kitteh no nom christmouse that was wid tree wyz guiz. dat mouz waz keyoot.
Nau, dey gud frenz!
enormos kittah dissprovz of ur natevety storeh
And dey sey deres no katz menshoned en de Bible….
Yah, I lookded it up too. I beeleeve dats rite. I tink caws silleh peepuls wut messed wiff Bibul an re-rote it too dere satisfakshun had low upinyun ub cats and wuz superstishus or tot dey wuz occultish?
Dummies.
Aye ugree! Fur a relijun whut cumz alawt frum da jypshuns, der shood be moar menshun uv da kittehs!!!
ah thimk wuz a respwns 2 Jyptshuns an tehr “Pagan” beleefs…awlso kitteh god wuz a Goddess, an teh wimmens wernt so berry hi awn teh romuns oar teh cristyunses lists…
I unnerstood taht teh jupshuns was defeeten by teh pershunz een jyunt battl bcuz teh pershunz carreed Kittehs insted ov wearin armur, noing teh jyphsuns wood NEVA harm teh kittehs. I kinna dowt tihs iz teh troof, tho, cuz wooden teh jypshuns an teh pershuns meetin like taht hav rezultid in a snorglefest taht wooda led to whirled peas?
Story also not say much abowt kitteh eetin entyr cast of animoos in barn
“I likes mah cheezburgers rare… Urp.”
Black kitteh with the lazaree eyez sayz: Praize the lord and pass the
cheezburger.
Maybe it wasn’t a star that led the three wise men to Bethlehem, maybe it was giant Kitteh lazer beam eyes. Think about it people!!! The Bible leaves out a lot of small details like this.
Foar gewd raisin, tew!
mai pair rents hav wite cat dat get ner na… nyt… Jezus, Merry, Josef an animalz seene, an looke like big anjel luking down frum abuv.
Ma kittehs takes turns lyin down behine teh manger. Dey likes to nock teh angels an shepherds aroun, but nebber touches teh Bebbeh Jesus.
Kitteh sez: “Once in Royal David’s City”–ur doin it rong. Teh reel wurds goes like dis:
Wunce by royal David’s Kitty
Stood a lowly cattle shed
Ware a muvver lade her bebbeh
In a manger for his bed. . .
Mary wuz dat muvver myld
Jesus Christ her liddle chyld
Dis mah favrit Christmas song! I lyk teh vershun on teh Cheeftens’ “Bells of Dubblin.”
Summbuddy libs widd a berry preddy blaek kitteh!
i has teh saem eggsact naytivitee seen. lolcat and awll.
“XMAS” with the nativity scene… eh bold to say the least.
GRAH!!!! ‘TIS BASEMENT CAT!
Gold, franken…frankenstuff and murr.
(Kittehs alwayz bring da Murr)
hiz i r mastr lolspekr i chaling u tooo a lolspek chaling
tri to winer agenst meh
ohe ya wel iz hre onse mi cat pood on one of doze mari &nd jisus thingz
p.s (this is not in lolspeak) i have 3 gerbils 3 fish &nd 2 cats