Uh…hai
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Cheezburger Network Blog
I iz in ur windowz, drinkin away my sorrowz
Ah dreek alone… yeah wit nobuddy else…
wen ah drink alown ah preefur tew b bi miself
Iz from Jorj Thorowgud songe
as uppose to drinkin alonez wif peeple aroundz yew?
It kin happunz.
That’s the worst kind of loneliness, you know. I do prefer to be alone on my own.
car 2 joinz meh?
Ur right dis wine do haz flava…..
But I naawt shur uv teh flavur…musht trai sum moar…. *hic*
….whai teh rhum awl wobbibbubbly?…. @_@
say how ’bout some cheese and mice crackahs…..
Dat sounz nommee! Fenk yew!
iffin dat beez merlow (oar neting red fur dat mattur) dis bee mii kinna kitteh-here I gotz teh nex bottle
dis kitteh enjois teh box wyne.
“enjois” an “teh box wyne” donut blong togebber in saym sennence
Whut dos yew meen? “Chato cardbord” is fabul…fabyew… gud stuf! Nawt!
Chataeux Neuf de Pleh!
Jez tink of ALL the CHATeaux win3s kitteh can enjoy.
P.S. Iz alwayz thout mai kittehs wer doin dis when I waz at werk…..
Bawx wyne haz itz playce. Daht playce R in a big kasserLOL!
what is box wine, please?
iz wyne taht komez in a bawx. gess itz in a plztik bag insyd teh bawx, so bawx no getz all mooshy, and teheres’ a liddl fawct on teh bawx to por teh wyne owt if so happnz somwun wantz to dirnk it. (don drink wyne mahsef, so don knoez much abowts it, taht’s wut i seed on teh teebee comm – cooom – koommer – adz.)
when blind dayte comez ova u let her in den u scram
But fiks us boff 2 sammichez B4 u leebz.
Kthxbai!
luk at teh kitteh…startin erlie. tisk tisk kitteh.
Iz 5 OhClok sumware.
yeah…it getz layte erlie aroun here!
kitteh drinkin sum “red red wine”
kitteh sings:
Red, red wine, it’s up to you
All I can do, I’ve done, but mem’ries won’t go
yah, mon…red, red wine make mii feel so fYne!
Maeks mi feel happi, awl ob teh tym!
Red red wine U maek meh feelz so grand
I feelz millyon burgerz wen ur juss in mah hand
ah heerd da UB40 vershun ob dat sawng b4 ah heer da neil dymond origanawl.
dat sawng mush less sad put tew a reggie beat
Lubs dat UB40 reekordeen. Nawt lyke dat neel dimund so mush akshuly.
Secrit ees owt az tu whi kitteh een such a gud mood everi nite wen hubbi cumz hoam.
Happi our startz earli at kitteh’z howz.
Member dat kittehz liv 6-7 yeers fur eberee hyoomin yeer.
Dat meenz dat kitteh daiz iz awlso faster.
Date meenz dat happee our happunz moar!
….um…dit dat maek teh sens? O_o
Duzzent matterz…here haz anodder glaz uff wine.
Ooooo….fenk yew!
*glub glub glub*
*hic*
I lub u, maaaaaan!!!
Eyez a guirl! Eye swarez eye goin back tu meye namez bein Lynn.
Everbodi tinks Tribble bez a boi!
N E wun needz a refillz?
Doan wurry Tribble,
Wolffie callz ebbrybuddeh “man”
affer he frows a few bak.
He wud nebber b disrepec…disrespect…sai bad stuffs bout
byootiful Tribble.
Iz zakly riet, Romeow. Fenk yew berree munch.
I lubs awl teh byoootiful wimminz.
fank joo mizz tribble, ah wood lub a nyce glass ov wyne! oh heer lemmee juss fish dis martini furst…. *sip sip sip*
k thnx : )
Eye tinkz wii awl needz sum fud een hour belliez.
Everbodi cum hear an haz sum chineze fud. Eye gotz de carri owt.
joo are berri smrt! i can has steamed dumpling?
Enifink u wantz. Eye haz beeg seelekshun. Don furgeet yur furtune kookie.
Hai Tribble! I wud lub to joyn u fur a glass ov vino an sum chineze fud, iffs u doan mind. A springed roll wud be nise.
Duz u hab enny goo goo gai pan? Iffs Darrkwolff izn’t heer soon, I’ll bringz him sum goo tew go.
I can has seesaymee chikin? Iz mah fayvrit!
An Laydee Tribble, I drinkz 2 ur helf! U iz full uv win an awsum!
Tank u. Yez, dere iz de goo goo gai pan an seesaymee chikin. Please tu be tryin da Pheenex Delight, iz berry gud. Don forgetz yur oranje slizez an furtune kookiez. Doan worri, eye haz nebber had de oranje slizez bee poizon.
Ah tinks Tribbles R herm, heem, bof seckseses @ 1se!
Oar happuns moar offen!
Yesh…dash whu ah mint….
I jest haz the wun glass, stop given meh the fiff digree!
U musta had tew much winez, iffs U fink it cums ina fiff.
Yu had a fiff too??? Yu need anninnervenshun, kiddo!
i wuz counting on sum meh tyme…
yoo find yoo cud come back latr ??
kthxbai
Awl teh tyme is “meh tyme” for kittehs!
Dis Wine.
It has a bukket?
Dis muss b lolrus wine, cuz teh red winez no can has bukket.
Sowy.
Kitteh has forgot sumfing…and is now rambling drunkenly to itself in teh window
“Is PinLOL Nom?
or MerLOL?
is a litul bit drai, so defnitly iz not teh BoozhLOLey
LOL Massawn, we will sell no bukkit befoar its tiem!
*hic* Wooooo!
but srsly guyze, ai lubs ebbery last wun of ya”
kitteh will wake up two days later and twenty miles from home in an apartment full of other passed out, partyed out kittehs and be grateful that cats aren’t prone to wearing underwear, because otherwise they’d be on backwards or missing
lol!
WIN!
The Crapture strikes again!
it depens on hao yu pronun…pernon… say it
Ur wyne; I haz it…tee hee…hic.
Wun moar bottul an it haz meh! Weeeeeee!
It reely gotz on top ov U, diddnt it.
Hoo boi, did it ebber! O_o
In Soviet Russia, the wine haz U.
nah, in Soviet Russia the VODKA haz u ;P
I can has twelve steps?
each foot stepz won time! (he, he!)
Duz dat meen dat kitteh habs
a 3 step progam or a 48 step progam?
Yesh!
Math….DO NOT WANT! >_<
kitteh, we puts you on wun step program!
we wont lets yoo take wum step wrong!
wii B holdin’ yer paw allda way!
Kitteh sez “Holdin mah paw!? DOez not wantz!”
Jus don drinkz an drivez. Da pleeze ocifer weel makez u walkz de linz een strait stepz!
Dis beez a gud tyme fur de disclaimerz: Wii in no wai advo, avocat…tinkz eetz a gud ideaz fur N E wun tu over indulge in da drinkin uff de alolaholic bev, beveer…drinkz. Eef u muss drinkz (an wii muss) den due eet rezponzibli. An member frenz don let frenz drive drunk ( an wii awl frenz heer).
Maaah! The kat is drinkin agen!
yeah…how’d dat dang kat git into teh non-poseable thumb-proof cabby-net?!!!???
No wunz likez a tattle tayle.
But we lubs teh floofy tayle.
’s jus a ruse two win yer affekshuns…
Dang it! I fawlz fur dat ebberee tyem! >_<
How to make a happy birthday happier.
Get your pussy drunk.
I can’t believe I said that. Please, no rotten tomatoes (it is my birthday after all)
Happeh Birfdai Shera!!!
Hopes U hab a wonnerful dai an yeer!
same on U S(kv), butz hapi birfdai 2 U, hapi birfdai 2 U, ober and ober agin til itz countz 1 pas U R ear.. no spaksz no moar!
Less awl raize hour glazzez an toast tu (whut wuz her namez?)
oh, Shera’z birfdai. *clink*
No matterz how poorly een tayste her commentz wuz.
commentz haz a flahver?
Happi Birfdai!!!
I keeps mah mind in teh gutturz…
so ur commint is fine wif me!!!!!
HAPPI BIRFDAI!!!!
happi birffday S(KV)!!
Melissa, Mi fren Carmen tell dirty jokes a lot sew ah alwais sai her mynd spends sew mush tyme n da gutter dat it keeps a summer home there : )
tee, heee—izit a liddle-teeeny houseboot flootin in teh wadder?
ps–half a yipppiieee eye-oh dai and lief, Shera!!!
heh! it is nao : )
i wiff yew birffdai sqwirrel, get hers frunk
I kan haz “BL8ed Birfdae Greetinz” 4 Shera?
U not sez iz UR birfdae til aftur I goez home.
Fankoos eberbuddee for the good wishes!
Ai, too am layte, but nebbertehless ai wishes you awl teh happiest things fur yur birfday and awl the dayz to follow.
Haz yoo had a nice partee? or did yoo just has to werk. Next year will will hav a beeg partee HEER!
HAPPEE BIRFDAI !!!!
ii wuz tinkin dat in addishun to teh wyne, um, er, hous to put dis… der wuz sum aktivitees dat wud warrint ceeling cat’s attenshun
U fink he waz praying to Celing Cat?
He doan luk liek hims waz doing enny prayin. I cud b rong.
U no ai wuz jess thinkin ov dat maiself. Ceeling Cat jenerali haz a grate innerest in kittehs dat b sittin awl sprawly liek dat.
Eye been cleanin awl dai.
Deed u member tu:
Go tu yur denteest pointment?
Stop bye de grozeree stor?
Peek up de dri cleanin?
Getz da kidz frum wrestlin an karate?
Peek up de chineze fud fur deener?
Get de goggie frum da grumer?
Stop bye Wal*Martz fur…
An Ambien, a bafftub, ana clogged drain…
sum drayno, a erthworm, ana fruit lupe
a giraff, a helikoptor, a iggyuanna (called Sean)…
Kan sum wun explayne dis progreshun ob tree itums? Ai has seen if befoar an wunderd.
We iz plain “Mai Ant Went Shawpin” – stuff has to go in alfamabettical ordeh; yu can do moer tahn 3, is jus taht 3 werks pritty well an meens moer peepls can plai.
…ana jakkhammur, ana llama fase, ana munnee…….
a notebuk, a organ, ana plant
a quart of quark, sum rissoto, an tapioka..
a ukelelelele, a viola an a weimeraner
an a xylophone, an a yellow sumarien, an a zoo.
(sowy-cudnt fing of z wurd uner preshur)
tanks Ambercat fer splainin da rulz
(I playd tihs game da rong wai last month)
Nao ai noes, ai is awl set fur teh nex tyme. Fanks, Ambrkat!
Oh yeah….well then…. a loaf of bread, a container of milk, and a stick of butter…..what, I did it wrong???? Oh well…*sigh*
Ai think yoo just maed a nice sandwich wif a tastee beveraj. Haz yoo sum bred&budder pickles to go awn the bred. Even moar yummee.
Whut??? I needz two git my anti-axidents, twoo!!!
teh red wyne is teh PRO-aksidents!
aksidents happen.
Aksdents will happen
We onlee hit and run
Yu yused to be a viktum
Now yer not teh onlee wun
Tank yu fore teh eerwurm to sing me to bed!
Iz nawt eerwurm.
Iz babelfishee.
“ai lykes eerthwurms”–
sed teh compost
Elvis Costello ftw.
Yup….dat haoh lil kittehz git started….
ya gotta start sumwhear!!
*whew* luks lyk Don got outta heer juss in tym…
Dey wanna mayk meh goez 2 reehab babee Ai sez noe noe noe …..
kant leeb mui polz view frum teh biig winow. Needz glaz
I aint gotz teh tiem,
An iffs mah daddeh finks Iz fine
Hims tri to maek meh go to rehabz
I wontz go, go, go.
mah lokl noozpapr cellub – cebel – famus-peepz-aktin-bad colummmmnisist startd callin herz “Amy Wineglass” lol
Neu BFFs:
Britawny Shears ‘n’ Pawus Heaton
Kitteh goin doawn lowng darrk raowd.
doan fergit Lionsay Lopaw.
Besht Shpot t’watch Birdz flyl inta winder.
Mouse liver and a nice Chianti, nom… nom…
Dat reelee fluffee tayl!!
Kat b da kewt!!
Truu storee: Won tymes dis gui Ai wuz dateeng naym Tommee, wuz drinkung da red wyne an playun wiff mah mossly whyt kitteh Maxi. Ai heers Tommees sai, “oops” an Ai luks ova an dere iz a spill ov red wyne on Maxi! Tommee waz all scarid Ai wud b mad butt spill so littel Ai did nawt caer. Ai wets a papur towil 2 goe cleen Maxi off butt Maxis wud nawt lett meh! Hims wuz 2 bizzy likking it off. He reelee lyked it (butt it nawt enuff 2 harm hims).
Tommee wuz fraid dat teh wyne wud stayn teh littel whyte kitteh. Butt kitteh tuuk caer ov DAT!!
We had a kitteh taht lyked teh sherri – Ai tink she wored a big hat an wite glubs an did teh Dedly Sniff ob Disaprofal, wen we nawt luking
A lil club sodee will taek care of dat……
Y iz it dat kittehz will cleens up da wine,
butts wont tuch dere own durty butt?
Paretnly, dats mah jowb.
*sigh*
wear’s scarlett kitteh?
Feer nawt, lolfrenz, kitteh is onlee drinkin boones farm, wich is practiklee koolaid.
Much pleh!
Um. . .haz NEwun reelized dat kitteh is holding teh wine glass an teh cigarillol wif teh FUMZ??!!11! Kittehs haz fumz!
We in trubble now.
O, Eye sea now, dat’s how he got inna “non-fumbly” cabby-net!
I call it a little ‘Hair of the Dog’… and no I didn’t wash the blender yet.
Kitteh juss duz wutz
Kitteh duz wenz Hewminz arz
no wayrz 2 B seend
Prittee Wun habz t3h
Tee Vee 4 herz soapz. Kitteh
habz t3h Windo Sill
Kitteh mezzmurrized
wiff wut goez awn Outsyde. It’z
diffrent ebbee day
Jack.
Kitteh can has teh wine in frunt ov him.
kitteh sez rather hav bottl in frunt of mei than a fruntal labotummy
i can has poppys? poppys… poppys… poppys…
we be gibbin you a fruntal LUF-atummy!
I can haz designated drivr?
Yez, an eyem glad u asked. Doez ennywun elze needz de ridez home?
Eye haz putz mye wand hand owt an calleded da nite buz. Everbuddi getz on eet an tell Stan Shunpike wherez u needz tu go, an de will takez u dere. De haz nize comfy bedz fur u tu lie on till u getz home.
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH! luk out fro teh liddl ols laadiez!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Taht braw an’ pant-eez?……erm…… dey bee……uhhhh……MINE! (Yeah, taht zounds pawsible; KEENKEE, butt pawsible.) (Pssst, sneek aot bak, NAO)
Y do cats sits like hoomuns? Itz so weirdz!