Crabby old man kitteh
Incorrect credit or offensive?
Add this to your blog:
« Previous Don Juan Kitteh | u upside down for Next »
183 Comments »
Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.
Do, or do nawt.
Der is no trai.
Duz eneboty no ah rely, rely uggglee danse?
Howze abawt teh funkee chikin? Dat kin get preetee ugilee sumtiemz…
Dun!
peck, peck left
peck, peck right
flap elbows and hop in circle
*repeat*
I’z chikin nawt duk!
I’z chikin nawt duk!
Wodl wodl kwak kwak kwak kwak!
Eye had sum ducks in my yard a few yers agoe (it urked my hubby, tho), and tehy ran aroun my in my yard an teh grass waz nebber ebber so grean!
(an dey were soo key-ute!)
Yoda FTW! Maibee a Jedi, marshul artz, wizzin arownd in der air kinda dans?
I can haz Star Warz kid dans?
Star Warz kid dans cud bee verree funnee (tho hoo heer wud akshullee DO it ai donut know! WHUT a way to become faymouse.
Ai wuz visiting sum frenz in Santa Fe a while bak and tehy had nawt seen teh Star Warz kid - so ai sayed ai wud show tehm, but remembered it rong, an typed in “Star Wars Boy.” Teh result wuz qwite surprising. Donut trai it if enewun under 18 is neerbai.
yeah, i’ve hurd that storie a gazillion tymes!
Boring!!!
U noz wen i met ur Unkl Lenney, we wuz at teh Elks Lawdg, and wen I stud up teh shayk his paw, he wuz taller than meh, and I thought I wuz a tawl kitteh! But he was RILLY RILLY tawl! Even cumpayrt to doggehs he wuz RILLY tawl!
dat storee shudd hav kwotashun marks around eet.
Hahaha what an old man
Hoo dat? Dat nawt me. O_o
I din’t poast dat poast.
Stoopee Wurdpres! >_<
I bleev yU, DW, dat poast naut funnkee. Farr B-low yU. N-fakt, iI wuz waytin for teh next funnkee think soas I could trie to shoot back!
Thankeez! I preesh-ee-atez it.
dat naut funnknee eeder, DW, Eye iz diskapoynted!
i tink mor lik da empora witout hes cloak
WIN!!!
Hey you kids! Get off the d*7&^ lawn!
Y yU nawt lyke bawlt worn-down lawn; haveya luckt ina mirror Latelee?
Dat’s egzzatlee whut i thot wenn ah saw dis!!
Damn!! Meh, 2!!
gross
“but mom !!! I don’t wanna haf to kiss grandpa, even if it is the holidaze !!!”
Kiss crabby grumpy grampy-paw!?
No Want!!!
Himz smellz liek teh proonz! O_o
Crabby Old Kitteh can do more than tell boring stories - he can also kick your ass down the street as easily as he swats a platic ball! But we’ve heard that he haz a heart of gold.
i nawt like two bee bored or kickt, butt i do heart his gold!
Many Many moons ago, when I was a Brownie Scout, we used to visit the senior citizens home at Thanksgiving, etc. I got to like this one guy, Mr. Parks, and I kept visiting him for years and years. He was crabby and opinionated, and he had me convinced that he was doing me a favor by letting me visit. I liked him and his stories. In tenth grade this pair of goody two shoes decided to join me on my visits, I didn’t want them along, but they were determined to “do good.” Man, did Mr. Parks rip in to them. Saw through them in a millisecond. In his politest manner (which I had never seen before) he discussed with them the hypocrisy of their ways, and how much better it would have been to come with the frame of mind that there was something the could learn, instead of something they could teach. Especially since they were 15 and he was 95 and had lived through what they were taught as history.
I was determined to never give him a chance to be polite at me.
And yes, if you do the math, I visited with him weekly for 9 years. He was a hoot, and while I often got the sharp side of his tongue, I learned more about people from him than from any other source.
That is a REALLY cool story.
Made my night.
Thanks.
Yeah–MUSH bedder storee dan “tuesays wiff Morrie”, who onlee visted teh old guy in teh last few weeks of hiz life, and got national media coverage (before an after!) WAY TO GO D MARIE–tihs werld needs maries, not Morries! Or peeps wif two gud shues.
o–i naut meen “Morrie” I mean “Mitch Aplomb”.
D Marie, taht is wun hekova storee. Wun sorta hasta feel sorree fur the goodeetwoshoes, tho, ai think, becuz tehy just don’t get it. They thinkz they is doin gud. . .ai think, eneway, but just dont realize taht it must come frum the hart.
That’s a grate storee!
9 years is a long tiem. He musta been a cool guy to keep you coming back awl that tiem, wen, as a kid, there waz lotz ov ober stuff going on. I’m sure he got az much outta teh bisits as joo did.
Fanks fur tellin us!
Marie,
Too many r mean to old hoomans.
Wish mah granpa still here to “bore” me wid his stories.
I wud hab gawten awai wif it iffin it wuzn’t fur doze meddlen kidz!
wee has aten awl yer nip. srry!
Rooby Rooby Roo FTW!!11!
You see kids, this is why you should wear sunblock!
sunblock, smunblock–we don’t need no sunblok!
Then thou shalt appear like a nutsack when thou art old.
Thy commint iz nut cold for!
*finks two sef*
“takes won two know won!”
Sorry, not meant as a personal dig. It’s just that old sun-wrinkled skin is yucky. Prefer to wear sunblock and not look like face of leather 30yr from now.
Sry!
Eye didn’t fink it wuz a dig–I finks it wuz a yolk–I nut take it serriously! (’cept for I’m laffing whilst eye tries to imagin mysef az nutsack! [sumtimes yU feel lyke a nut {like me tonite!}] sry fir awl tej groany yolks, folks!])
It wuz yolk! Egg-zakly!
hmmm, I rlly lyke yolks–maybee I culd make mysef a eggyolk facial–den ii naut need sunblock!
If an old man thatlooks like a nut sack goes swimming in cold water does he turn into a wrinkly midget??
I can has barf bag furr dat imagine in my mynd?
Hee!
I keep telling everyone who comments about my pasty-white skin that when I’m 80, at least I’ll look only 60, whereas they look 80 already!
yeah, Cotpie, and show ‘em a picher of this kitteh fore gud measure!
Dehm kittehs pawwin’ ower mah lawn!
Az lawng az dey nawt pootin, den it okai.
we naut pawwin er pootin,
weez be pooPing!
Ack! O_o Do not want furtiliezur!
aww–use juz gellus becuz yU naut Chi-Chi-Chi-Chia-Cat an cannt grow grass awl obber urself!!
Iz nawt teh graz I iz fussin ober….it hau u getz teh graz 2 groah…. O_o Ick!
*kittehkits fings to selfes* yabbut yer teh won who stinkz. Prune breff.
Eewwwww! Do not want!
Kitteh needz a bref mint?
yabbut, it’d take way two menny bref mints to due dis jorb—kitteh needs Comet.
(srry fore stoopy commint!)
Kitkay, iz nawt stoopee. Dat miet jess haff 2 B dun.
my mommakitteh uset too make mii gargoyl wif Listerine (teh old amber kine, naut teh wimpy minty stuff) ebbery morning befor skool, an den wen i gots home, i haddta scour awl teh tubs und sinks wif Comet (not teh wimpy Softscrub!)!!11!!!!
I memberz teh Cawmet an teh Ammer Leestoreen! O_o
Teh Ammer Leestoreen is strawng, ’tis troo - but reelee gud fur yur gums. Killz awl teh baketeria. Mai dentist says to brush yur teef with it!
Yabbut, DW, djew hafta werk yer fingerz to teh bone, und teh floof clean offn yerself wiff da Cawment, or gargoyle blistereen?<