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Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
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Cheezburger Network Blog
NOMNOMNOMEEEEOWWWWWWwwwwwwwww…………
happi prickly firtsi danse fur ribbo
hop, hop
meowCH
wiggle, but wiggle, whisker wiggle, ear wiggle
MEOWCH
jump, jump, pounce, lik, lik, lik
meowch
in soviet russia …
pwick cactuses you
… wait, whu?
mah pointy endz
let me show u dem
oh u gotz dem too?
flabvor! Butz iz nowt tastee.
oh haz flavr! Hang on – that’s mai flavr …. I’M BLEEDIN!!!
Hmmm I r tastee an nootrishis!
* nommin paw*
NOM OW! NOM OW!
teh flavr r iRONY!!1!
Gud job Ribbo on de “Top Spot”. Eye tried reel hardz, butt missed.
Hao abowt a dans?
Shimmee to teh lef,
Shimmee to teh rait,
nao do teh Twist!
Oops. I tink yoo gotta has a wayste to do teh twist…
deepend on whut ur twstin….
I innerupt dis dans fur an important anownsmint.
I am gettin a new kitteh!!!!!! Yeah!!! Hopefully, I can bring her home on the Monday, an luv her an skweez her and call her Esme!!!!!
I be happi person rite now.
She rescue kitteh livin in foster home rite now. But soon….
Ooh! New kitteh! U be naiz to hur, she be skeery kitty for furst dayz. She be hidey kitteh too, but tehn she kum owt an sniffy ur fingriz and sai, ooh, hooman be alrite. An den u has new kitteh.
COngratulatories! Wen ai got mai boyz sebral yeers bak, 1 taut he’d liv de rest ob hiz laif unner de bed an onlee cum out ta pooh wen ai naut lookin. Bud sum fresh cooked chikkie brest change hiz maind!
an I dance teh snoopy dans to celebrate, cuz Im 2 tired to twist
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EU4RVBuA4SU
oh ai iz sew gladdest fer u D Marie, (nawt to menshun, reeely jelus, ai needz a kitteh reel bad, butt needz place to put teh kitteh first,,,sigh) but I do teh
*new kitteh danse* fer u.
tippeetoeses, tippeetoeses, tippeetoeses,
slllllide to teh rite
tippeetoeses, tippeetoeses, tippeetoeses
sllllliiide to teh lef
an pik up teh new behbeh kittehs an snorgles gentli
an bak to posishun one……
tippeetoeses, tippeetoses, tippeetoeses…….
an so awn……..
Yeah new kitteh,… tell u awl about her wen u getz hers home..K???
Iz vry gud! Ai haz rexue kitteh 2weks naow, so iz DommiesmommieAxel2!
Yu getz COMFORT ZONE plug-in, has FELIWAY – happeh kitteh pheremones! Maeks nu kitteh al happeh tu b wich u!
Congrats tu newkitteh Esme 2, on faindin fourebber home!
Rawther like a fine, sharp cheddar!
Just more sharp.
Much more!
U too friggin phunnie!!!
Peed a lil an spewed mah gingeree ale AT WUNCE!!!!
…it has a flavaAAARGH!!1
ohh…de troll ees back. An after de nize tingz eye said bout heem bein a good kitteh dat just du bad tings. Okey dokey iz have no choice…”Wingardeum leviosa” hitz u wit ur own club. Iz tink eye needz a stronger spellz.
Wii makin progrezz, hez jus after mii. Eye guess datz whut eye getz fur trying tu see da gud in peeplus, an nowt sai enifink bad bout dem. Course eye did wack heem with hez club a few tymes. Butz hez started eetz!
Tanks u guys fur votin mii up.
ohai, tribbel.
i maked u 5 cheezburgers…
ees okay tribble, he wuz affer me last picture.
umm . . . ees akshooly nawt momcat.
I fixes naow.
Nopaleetoez is no ma pal!
Radder lik a small perfeckly formed hodgeheg
Dental helf kitteh brushes an flossiz at saym tiem!
Look Ma, no cabiteez! An no kibbullz to gib me yuckee fish breff!
yur prikuls, tehy tikuls!
sumtines a cacti is juss . . .a cacti.
Linzee Lohanz kitteh haz similurlee lo standurdz…. an a mowthful ov pri-ai problee shudnt say dat
not unlike madonna deep throating a watermelon
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SaSDWm6jvNI
( watch for kathy griffin, before she was even D list )
!!!!!!!!!!!!!! um…. i rekkin she woz faykin it?… and ew. . . . she shud do a stayj show wiv teh Solid Gold metal geer robotz. mutch win & awsum, btw Stend… ICHC shud start a payj for ebrywun to poast their moast effed-up damidj vid linx, wiv burgr raytings foar carnidj and bizarrity.
It bit me, sew eye bite it back!
Nowt such a gud ideaz. Ennybody gotz sum tweezerz?
Deh haz enny in da CCC?
Heer go, beree fyne poyntee enz fur pullin priker-stikerz!
B!
Tank u sew mush onceajinx. Eye apreciaets eetz. Nowz wii needz de smellin saltz fur IBK.
rite nex 2 da hello kitteh bandades… manfred mom? janet? salleh? kafleen? gremlin? teho? stend? uh… typin r naw akti… (hm.)
u dere?
plz. i nawt has keeys 2 cart, an tribbel da kat bleeeeeeedin…
(faint)
(i eezeh kweezeh)
o!
fanks, once a jinx. i panikked.
Tweezrs.. Ai haz dem.
LOL, wuz rememmerin ma fayvrit tweezers, Ai usta carry dem in ma pokit alla tiem. Den we floo to UK, an da NTSB wantid to keep evreewun sayf frum terrrrists (R iz it toooorrrists? Sownz da saym…)
Dey sed mai tweezeez wuz too poyntee, nawt sayf. Ai neerlee hit dem wif mai cane! Den Ai seen on Ebay, all dat stuff dat bin ‘confiscaytid’? DEY SELLIN IT!!! Stollin propitee, Ai fink!
An still no sayfr R moar danjerus to flai. Stoopee NTSB!
Stoopy NTSB tooked my SAFETEY SXCISSORZ (wut I were gonna use to cut yarn wif )on flyt to Seattle. HowI’mgonna stab sumbuddy wif SAFETY sizzrz?? Dem tings don’t even cut construxion paypr dat good!!!!!
Ended up cuttn yarn wif nail-clipper.
DEy letz anail-cliiperz awn teh flite ??????? Must be slippin
U oh kay IBK? Eye askeded oceanjinx fur de smellin saltz fur u. Jus sitz up slowly. Deed u hitz ur head on ennyfink when u pazzed owt? Wii haz tu watch owt fur de concuzzion. Mi son iz de futball playerz, an eet beeg concernz fur dem.
fanks, tribbel. i no ring mah bell. (chexs) i no pee.
nao suuper duuper. butt dose smeelin salt stuff… boi, dey gotz nerfes callin dat SALT. pleh.
oh Hai ibk !!! ai jest back to twon an mi puter………r u OK???? ai noes prolly choklit wil hep….heerz sum ob mi pribate persunal Cadbury’z stache…….(whispers…..iz mi bery faborite …….whispa”s …….bery nommy an smooooth an meltz in ur mouff,……..iz nawt nootrishus tho………jest delishus)
OK ai gotz a liddle tyme for to man the CCC ifn neswsessarily needfulz…….but luks lik most ob teh damaj iz frum runnin into teh cactusus……..
ai hab spentz sum tyme in teh desertt….. an hab persunally runned into sum vishus memburz ob taht fambily……..tehy r teh “OOWWIIEEEZZ) eben if jest getz a LIDDLE TEENY TINY peeces ob the poynty part in u……..
so iz choklit an tweezerz tonite eh?????
sownd likes a gud sammwich 2 meh.
a choklit an tweezerz sammich???????? oh noes ibk, ai tink u hitted ur hed harder tahn u thot………maibeee u shood lai down an put a coldy ragz awn ur fourhed…….
heer ai halp u to sit dawn noaw………..
how miny fingehs am ai holdin up?????
6 on da wun hand…
Perhasp summun shud fan u. Taht mite help.
eeben moar on da uvver…
Oh noez…quick was de number fur 911?
… uh … tribbel…
dats hao menny fingerz is salleh holdin up.
*bonk*
*hed flor*
K,stand bak, everbuddi
*big guise wif teh baggy trousers an teh fans cumin thru*
U b fine soon ittehbitteh
beeg guise? (yummeh!)
i finks i mite needs da mouf-2-mouf. heer deys come!
o. (yikes.)
u knows whut? i feelin betterer awllreddy. no. no. u duznt has 2~ *hides eyse* wuz gonna say, u duznt has 2 bend ober an turns on da fan…….
Must b teh WordPress agen. I sent teh big Egyptian type guise, wif teh feather fans, an u gotz teh “hoonoes wotz” wif de lectirc fans. Or mebbe itz teh bang on teh hed.
stoopeh wurd press…. borked up mah social life agins….
butt ai seez taht u r noaw sittin up an tawlkin sence…..heer u can hab sum moar choklit…..
(choklit iz mi anser to loawtz ob probblemz, wen u hab a panecea, u hab a panecea…..)
butt jest in case ………ai brot …..mi FAN *pullz owt big peece ob constucshun papehz taht ai hab foldeded bak an forth an bak an forth an bak an forth an bak an forth*
iz fan ai maded jest fer u ! (usin boff hans ai wabe in in ibk fase, her hare is blowin in teh wind , so to speek)
ok ai go naow……
fanks u so mutch, mah frenz! i presheeyaes da schokolate an da fans. i kinda sorta wudda presheeyated da beeg guise. (woof) prolly nobuddy like da smeelin salts. did ennybuddy ebber tells u dat smell like da pee…? nawt complainin – just sayin. (dat did wakes meh up from da faintedniss.)
an tribbel… pleez no moar playin wif kaktusses. iz lessin 2 us awll: stay awa from pr*xs.
Hi guys, sorry to have left you tonight. In an ironic twist of fate, my son came home from wrestling practice and said his head had been slammed down on the mat and he was concerned about a concussion! I can’t believe we made it all the way through football season fine, and then, when he’s on the floor, his head gets banged! I think he is fine. But we’ll see how he feels tomorrow and for the next few weeks. Goodnight for now. -Lynn
oh ibk ai am beginning to fink maibee u iz jest a liddle *accidentz prone* we gonna hav to keepz an eye awn u, lests u endz up in the ……..(cue TA_DUM musik) hosrpitul !!!!
horspitulz r no funz at awl…….so u beee moar carefulz k?
ana Tribble, keepz us apprazed ob how ur son iz doin……do u hab to sit up awl nite wif him ????
iz okay – juss plug thee woond wiv ur toe until can get Tribble to a hardwaer stoar….. BWA HA HA HA HAAAAAAAAAAAA
Botany Cat gets up close and personal with the subject of his thesis.
Botany Cat is definitely an educated idiot.
ai kno lotsa thos.
h*** ai IZ wun ob dose……..
i can has door uv purrsepshun?
Meskaleen haz poyntee enz?
Cactus Cat
is almost NSFW, if ya know whut I meens
LOL, yes! Mens wood git eben less secks ef dey wuz reelee liek dat!
(sept ma hubbee!! LOL, nuj nuj, wink wink!)
eeerm, no?
no, whut DUZ yoo meens?
*loox agen*
ahhhh. i sees it.
ew.
ok ai offshul idot, ai don getz it……..plz to splain?????
an soh farr, noesbuddi haz ecksplaned- menny ours wez hab bin weighting!
OK, ok, Ai splayn as B!, nawt as once a jinx cuz Ah’m awn ma uvver pooter…
OK, see da lawng, tall cactusee bit da kitteh iz nomming? OK. Nao, look to da rite a bit, see da lil rownd cactusee plant?
Nao, ef yoo a gurl, theenk bak to helf class R mebbe ask hubbee R boifren. NAWT NE uvver famblee membrrz… Got it yet?
Ef yoo a guy an kant see da rezemblants, mebbee yoo shood go into pryvit room an look at yorseff sidewayz liek in da mirr.
OK, nao, look at kitteh agin. Hmm, mebbee kitteh’s naym iz Monica Lewinskee?
Ai cant git moar grafik dan dat wivowt loozin da site’s MPAA raytin!!
*hed desk*
OK, Ai gets tehre’s a falik refrens tehre, but Ai STILL donut noe wut teh ledders “NSFW” stan fore! Ai’s can has crosswerd clew?
It be’s meanin “Nawt safe fur werk.” Jus in kase you be’s lookin at LOLcats on de job. Kan’t be having BossCat see NSFW tings. Den you has no more job, and no more munees.
“If uz luk sharp, an u beez sharp 2
jooz teh catus wut got built 4 u!”
FAIL
epic fail.
befoar today, teh NRC had nevver publiklee consittered the possibilitee that a nuklear plant mite be vunnerabull to kamakaze attak by a giant kitteh.
Dis nawt faer! Nom nomz haz moar pointee enz dan I haz! *sob*
after llong reflesc- reflekx- *sigh* finkin bout dis, i see dat sumwun have hypmo- hippa- *sigh* brane wash kitteh into finkin dis be cheezburger.
whuta whirrled bee dis… *sadleh shake mah hed*
(jk. akshalleh, dis bee matrix kat, an matrix kat have brane wash us into finkin we lukin at lolpics. we are but energy packs in a battery-powered, ever-flowing cat fountain.)
“I yam 2 yung 2 bai takeelah, so I has to git it frum teh sorse…”
I can has ambulanse?
dis plant… it has manee pointee ends. owie.
OK. I have beenned owned by two whit kitteh in mah life.
Miss Turkey, teh baybee steeler,(SRSLY, one of mah strays I took in was preggers before I could get her fixed an Miss Turkey STOLE her baybees. Put ‘em on her belley an everyfing. She even made milk.)
an Polly, teh fetcher.
But I swaer to all mah lolfrens, both of tehm were jus a lil… well, stoopy.
It wus like havin lil blawnde dingee girrlz foar kittehs.
So I can see how dis wud happin!
naow ai don noes about taht……..ai onct hadda whyte kitteh mane of “Jake” hoo waz teh koolest ob teh kool kittehz, (teh vet sed so, he (the vet) sed whyte kittehz were teh koolest)
iz ai repeetin miselv???? lawng dai…….
aniwai Jake nebber reeely thot he waz a kitteh, wen we wood hab dinnah partyz he wood sit at teh tablez an luk round at teh peeplez az if to sai ,”plz to passes me taht lobberli ham ……an cheez sawse k?” but wood nawt jump up on teh table, wood wate nisely fer hiz tern.
beri wel mannereded……celery cullured eyes,
Well mebbe it r a female fingee.
Bof kittehs vary sweet an snorglee.
Dey bof jus did phunnie stoopy fings like walkin into pateeo doors,
an Miss Turkey wud eet a hole in teh bred if u left it owt.
Polly was jus a lil dingee girlee girl kitteh.
She wud tilt her hed like a puppeh if u talkded to her.
Nao Lissa, Aye habs beaned owned bai five whit kittehz in mah life, an dey awl bery smrt. Well, sumtiems we callz TJ (El Tigre Jefe)a doofus, butts xcepts fur dat, tehy awl habs teh smrtz. La Luz b such a thinker, sumtiems Aye fink taht she iz too smrt fur her own gud.
Funneh fing iz taht mah dark kittehz liek to rub teh face on teh cactus – butts teh wite wons neber do. Dark kitteh nawt so stoopy to try to nom teh cactus.
I guess I jus gotz 2 kitteh at teh bawtom of teh jean pool.
BUT I DOANT KERES!!
DEY SWEET AN TEWTALLY ADORABULS!!!
My Rom would have given them a run for the stoopy prize. He could fall off his feet standing still. Slept on a shelf and rolled over and fell off. Walked through wet tile adhesive. Got a glue trap stuck to his foot, and then stuck the whole thing (including foot) to the dogs nose. He was a gigolo. Gorgeous, attentive, and no brain matter at all. Miss him anyway. I’d say he went over the bridge, but I suspect he fell off and had to swim across.
LOL, O, Marie, dat hillareyus! Poor Rommy!!
Ai wuz gonna say mebbee deez kittehs R jus deeeep thinkrrz… to tha poynt that dey nawt pay tenshun to da whirld arown dem, liek a absint minded purrfesser R sumpin…
Ai nebber had whyt kitteh, too hard to keep kleen! Altho a whyt kitteh sayvd ma lyf wunce. Lawng storee… but sayvd me frum a perv when Ai wuz a little b!… Den runned away home wunce Ai wuz home an sayf… Wow….
Oh! Whyt kitteh sayvd ma Grammaw’s lyf wunce! Wuz not prevert, wuz RATTULSNAEK!
Whyt kittehs r gud tu hab. But den, AL kittehs r gud to hab!
fer sum reesun, ur grafic an wunnerfulli silleh splanshun of ur kitteh stoopnesses, minded me ob a sayin ai onct heerd……”he nawt smart enuff to pik matchin leefs of teh saem tree..”
ai laffed fer a week at taht …..an ai wil be laffin fer a week at ur kitteh, ……..fawled off the raynbow brij an hadda seim fer it…………chortle !!!!!
swim fer it , ….ai ment ,swim fer it…….
O MAI GOD – Itz Hunter S Nomson!!!!!!!
yu is maked horid evul pun. ai liks yu.
MWAH!
haha!
phunnee hao I lub teh lolspeak butz gettz bugged by teh plooral cacti wif a singlar dis!
hiz onli nomming on wun cacti. an yu kno teh kitteh wont lern frum xperince. watch fur “dis othr catcti, it has a…” comin soon to a kitteh neer yu.
Um…haz enybody seed Flick??
“Thtuk, thtuk….THTUUUUUKKK!!!”
Iz nawt a fud, iz a toofpik
Dis be remyndin meh of a kitteh naemed OJ. Wuz mah nayborz kitteh, but he ownd us too. Whinevur he wuz nawt getting enuff atenshun in teh yard, he wuld roll arownd by teh roze bushez an tuch teh thornz sofflee so ebreywun wuld go NO OJ DOANT TUCH TEH ROZES!! U WILL GET HURT!
Den he wuld be teh sentur of attenshun, as it shuld be.
Dis cat iz even dumber dan mah cat!
Dis catnip tastes like poyntee.
Jeremiah wuz uh fine oranj kitteh. He tride 2 eet cactus 2. I stopped him. He wuz not happee abowt that. I think he reely wanted 2 eet thu cactus.
Awwwww, poor Puddy Tat fall down go……BOOM!!!!
Do not want
Teh cactis has a very sharp tast tat stabz straigt intwo teh mouf.
Ebil LOL thot… Ai just membered dat videyo uv da lil bebe kitteh walkin alawng liek on a shelf, den steps awn a catusee plant, an da lil paws startid flailin, owee owee owee owee owee!
Poor bebe kitteh, but Ai still lol wen Ai tink uv it… Ai nawtee… Ai goin to da barn nao, kthxsowweebai
ai noes teh wun ob which u speek, an ai gotta agreeez , teh poor behbeh …….but iz sooooooo funni…teh liddle guy jest dint noes waht to do…..
(stiffled laffter)(an moar chortling)
I can has link to funnee video? kthx
No, u cannot has. Video wuz frum tv sho prodoost by Diznee, much kopyrytid. Wuz on intertoobz fr a wyle, den al kyndza thretz en lawsootz en uvver nastee stuf happind. Iz not on intertoobz ennymor. Pffft on Diznee (plz no lawsoot! is onlee verchooal pffft).
Dis iz definitly not cheezburger. Do not want!
Teh pointee bits, they has a flavor.
AND IT OW.
no chezburger, this hve to mak dos
or
sharpin’ ma theeth for cheezburgerr
This cactus thing happnd 2 mee once. Accidentaly brushed against it and pricklz got into mai hand! Owie! Keep cactus out of kitteh’s reach plz!
yea iz funny but iz not mai bukhet.
WOW! new cacti had thorny tings but didnt no dey had ouches 2
ya*
* felt like buggin yyou
Tough Cat
Eats pain for breakfast