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HE KNOWZ SUMTHIN


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  1. ittehbittehkitteh says:

    butt i knows bestest!

  2. D.R. says:

    Nomez! Noooommez!!!1!1!

    We is bein invaydid! Ruuuuuuuuuuun!

    Oo, momee momee momeee…

    (Hides)

    –blinkblinkblink–

    (Peeks out)

    He goned nao?

  3. Teho says:

    “…the smug little duck-fondling bastard”

  4. OK, peeps, put ur books away and get out ur #2 pensils. Let’s see if U knoes sumthing. Time for moar LOLSAT qwestions:

    1. I maded u a __________ but __________.
    a) cookie … i eeted it
    b) caek … someone left it out in teh rains
    c) lolpic … teh admins rejected it
    d) all of teh above
    e) some of teh above
    f) I can plz has nother pensil? I eeted mine.

    2. ESSAY QWESTION
    “Oh, hai. Lettuce acksept that Ceiling Cat eggists. But whut if he diddent? Well, we wud has to makes him up, ’cause he is nece… nessis… something teh induhvidual / sossieties cannot not has, for whatevah reesons. So then, if he DIDDENT exist, we would akshually bes living zactly teh same way, bleeving in a Ceiling Cat that is invisible. WTF???” With this irony, Loltaire s in ur test, denying teh existence of Ceiling Cat.

    Assigh… Essign… Whut U Has 2 Do:
    Rite a essay saying weather u thinks that it matters if Ceiling Cat exists or not so much. Refur to ur own speeriences, whut u has readed, and ur favrite lolpics to sport ur posishun.

    3. A Bunways airplain leevs Chicago at eleventeen-fifty o’clock, bound for Denver. Monorail Cat is apposed to meet teh plain but has been derailed outside of Colorado Springs. Helikat is airlifting peepls wif sploded heds to teh HSRW at Teh Hold Teh Mayo Clinick and cannot bes back in time to fill in. U is a passenger on teh airplain and will be late for ur anger management senimar. Whut u gonna has 4 lunch?
    a) Cheezburger
    b) Nuggitz
    c) Large Frys
    d) Diet soda
    e) all of teh above
    f) all of teh above plus sekkond halpings
    g) oh, and a apple pi, too. kthx

    • zski says:

      u makes my hed hurtz. But in a gud wai.

    • cheshiepat says:

      FULLZ of winne!

    • conscious cat says:

      LOLWTF ai jus peed uh liddel

    • CrazyOldLady says:

      OMG….I forgoptted tu studee….I hatez popquizzez!
      Hey, philene, I can has borrowing of wun of yur pinsels, plzthx???

    • ittehbittehkitteh says:

      awlritey denn. i startz dis testee.

      1. a)
      2. [dunno da anser - dint studdy da loltaire so mutch. neechee - 'xcuse meh - was moar whut i studdy, so i can sez moar about da uberkittehs an da end of da whirrled as we knows it... i gonna do whut i allways do 4 da kweshuns i cant anser, called da b.s. - also sumfin u can studdees all by itseffs at da kollej] dats a intrasting kweshun. howsevver, more intrasting is da kweshun if a lolcat in da wuuds an a leef falls, do da kitteh jump awn it? da ainchent greeks fot da kitteh wuud jump, butt dats onlee cause ov da closeniss of da mediterrr- mettiter– *sigh* med. sea an da closeniss of da sfeers. (see musik of… 4 moar info dere) moddern sceye-entistest has dicobbered dat da kitteh jump if da leef moobes or dere iz a teeny liddel mousie unders it. reseerch still bean did 2 see if da kitteh jump wen da leef doan moobe no moar – preelim- preelimnery rezults sez da haff dak ittehs jump on da not moobing leefs.
      3) G all da way, behbeh!!

    • Medicated_Maiden says:

      ai wuz lurking…but dis is just to good! WIN AND AWESOME!!

      Also, answers being [1]-B, [2]-Ceiling cat is being existing bcuz ifn he din den thur wood be no onez to watchez us all masturbates, and then the world would asplode from all teh sinnin, and dat not be good so he exist. kthxbai. [3] F and G are both correct, and anodder cheezburger.

      EXTRA CREDIT IF YOU IS CEILING CAT-

      Submit proof in form of lolcat link

      • Tiny Cheezburger & Angel Catburger says:

        aw, MM, u tu smartz, u gotted hear afore meeh

        CEILING CAT IS NO LONGER WATCHING US MASTURBATE … HE IS NOW BLIND

      • Medicated_Maiden says:

        Also, teh ovver dai when i sais dat i am secret fan of Teho? I is not crazy stalker, to small for dat. What I means by dis is just dat I looks up to hims a lil bit is all. I can has always wanted to work wif Hoomaine Sew Psy Etty, or Wiled Lief Rescyoo, I is in college for teh zoology and teh teaching…, and Teho be livvin teh dream (so much as Ai can be gather), Home full of kittehs and teh fur and love. I is just a youngun (is only teh 20) who can be looking up to people. And I be looking up to teh strangest of peoples sometiems…*glance at Sid Vicious Poster in cubicle) Cubicle..PLEH. Want intervyoo wif Hoomaine Sew Psy Etty to come and go wellz….Want out of dis box.

        • kathleen says:

          No boddee tinks u is stalker, sillee. U is a main ingreediunt ub ICHC ! :)

          I sees ur Hoomaine Se Psy Etty Posts an hopes it awl goes good an wunnerful fur u!!!

          /pardun teh buttin in

        • CrazyOldLady says:

          M_M, we all looks up to Teho! Nufin strange bout dat! Yu a gud kid and we wantz yu here makin us laff!! Also, srsly, I want you to know you have all of our good thoughts and prayers and yu can even have some of my good Karma….for your interview!!! We luz yu!

        • Teho says:

          i jus nawt so comfterbuls wif teh ideeya of havings fans. am nawt sillehbritee. i lykes anonnymowsies. an y’noe, dis nots eben mai syte; i jus coments a lot.

          we duz has teh kittehs at hoem, tho, an dem is (moawstlee) awsum.

          • Medicated_Maiden says:

            I’z not ‘fan’ per-sai…just nice to see dat teh dream is reachables. I is wanting lots of teh kitties and goggies and lolferrets and lolbirdies and an Iguana named Sean, an a pony and anovver pony, and some more kitties, and a unicorn…ect. I is zoology major! I just want house and land full of ebrythin dat is aminal in nature! Boyfriend think is not so great aktully, him likes the birdied and teh kittehs and goggies and ferrets, but him not so big on the Iguana named Sean. And Teho, teh more comments you make dat are win and awesome, teh more ‘fans’ you akwire, i is sure. Maybe try being not so awesome? I know, is hard, but if you can has anonnomonocities…(end sarcasm)

            • ittehbittehkitteh says:

              whut about kangaruus an ewoks an platmiusses an…

            • Medicated_Maiden says:

              TOO platimusses. An a hippo, an a Iguana named Sean, and anuvver kitteh, and some lolrusses, and a foxxes, and teh Emus, and teh polar bear. and a caribubear (al mai life, i go to milwaukee countee zoon, and der be a sighn what has arrows pointing where animals on list be living, and Caribu and teh bears be living near by so tehy is listed togevver, and I has always, since learning to read, has read dem together as caribubears, and always still to dis day be disapointed when der are being caribu and bear, but no caribubears) and chimmunk named Clancy and a pony named Glen…and a Doggie named Ronald….and uh…uh…i is running out of people names that look sillee on aminals…(Iguana named Sean is my favorite!!)

            • gascat says:

              yuz fergot da snakies! wez haz wunerful corned snakie nomed “diamond” (has liddle dimond on hed) she purddy red an yellr. neber fout I culd lik da snakies util fishykiddy gotz one. feed not so bad- frzn mousies sorta luk lik kiddi toy mosies but colder….

              momcat

          • ittehbittehkitteh says:

            oh, teho.
            *wipes mah eyses*
            nao iz all disappoint… if u changes ur mind, i willz be ur fan 2.
            *sad sigh. seez cheezburger on mah desk*
            *sad nomming take playce*

            • Medicated_Maiden says:

              sad nomming…is way of teh world…I noms when sad too. I thinkz most female do…*noms “funsize” dark chocobarz* Funsiez? Nuffing fun about dis tiny waste of foil wrapperz…I’s not sad right nao tho, I just lurves teh dark chocolatez. NomNomnomnomnom

          • CrazyOldLady says:

            Yu kan haz alla da anonnymowsies yu want….but keep on postin here!! Dat’s al I’m sayin….

          • kitsunerina says:

            Duz this meens ai has to stawp sqeeing ebery tiem ai sees teh Teho name?

            Cuz ai duz it to COL, B!, littelbittehkitteh, and Janet twos…

            • kitsunerina says:

              an am ai teh onlie wun who wants to pet teh floofy pink wun? srsly, ebery tiem ai sees teh wruds “floofy pink troll” ai wants to pley wif teh floofy pinkness an put bows an ribbuns an sparklees in it. ai noes, aiz werid. ai blames it awn lak uv kittehs to snorgle and smoo.

            • ittehbittehkitteh says:

              kitsunerina:
              nao i gonna skweels wen i seez ur name, 2!!
              *skweeeeeeel*

              an i gotz 2 admit i likes stend in pink. i likes stend in floof.

              if i has 2 list awll da lolfrenz i likes an awll da ways i likes dem, dis gonna be wun loooooooong post………

              k. i spares u. just a beeeeeg schmoo 2 mah frnz.

          • gascat says:

            “sum peeps bornd gret, sum achive greatnes, an sum haz greatness thrustd on dem”

            teho- I finks u gotz awl free
            an when u realiz dat dis cum frm spooffy ledder- wuks beddr!

            momcat

          • SJ says:

            Ohhhh Teho – ai has teh immij of Sid teh Slof in Aice Ayge Too wen awl teh liddl slofs wurships him…..

            we is wurshippin ju, maightee Teho!!!

            Ob corse, tehn tehy tries tu sakwifice him in teh volcaino, so mebbe teh adumulorayshun nawt so gret, akshully.

      • CrazyOldLady says:

        M_M, no lurkin…come join teh birfdai fun!! Here, have some tekillya wif lime!

    • spykes_mom says:

      WIN! Dis mayd me to lafft owt lowd n nao my ko-werkerz be lukin at me lyke, “WTF”

    • Tiny Cheezburger & Angel Catburger says:

      1: anser is g) poopie / u stept een eet (I maded u a poopie but u stept een eet

      2: Seeling Cat ownly eggsists wens u mastur … mastar … plays wif urselfs. Fur meeh tu sez whebber Seeling Cat eggsists fur meeh, wells … DAT ARE BERRY PURRSONAL KWESTION. Gets outta mah fayce nao!

      3. anser is h) carrit an’ raysin salid … buns doan et fas’ foods. Beh kareful ob teh raysins, doh.

    • Elvis says:

      Dis LOLSAT hardur dan teh wun ai taked befurr. Ai can has reefresher corse?

    • Melissa says:

      Yea. DOANT LISSEN TO DAT NOME!!!
      HE LIE!
      Let’s nawt cheet.
      brawt to u by teh fowndashun foar a bettur life.

      I lub dat commershul.

    • cSmall says:

      1. yesh
      2. http://icanhascheezburger.com/2007/09/25/screw-dis-no-wants/
      mai pruf dat tehyr iz no ceelingkat.
      3. *liks azz* did yu aks meh sumting?

    • cSmall says:

      1. yesh
      2. Mt. McKinley
      3.*liks azz*…ohai yu aks meh sumtink?

    • Tony James says:

      Kribsheat fur LOLpeeps hoo didunt revyz:

      1. F

      2. Seelingkat eggzists no matter what LOLtaire or LOLrus-o sae. Dose hoo kanut see Seelingkat iz eyder (a) blynde, (b) stoopyhoomin, (c) doen mastabayt, or (d) two sinfull two see hiz noodlee appen… apenn… bits. Seelingkat iz not a phigmunt ov majinayshun. Hee eggzists. Dennaiyuhs ov teh eggzistans of Seelingkat ah HERETIKS an will bee exec… eksek… put to deff b4 a fihrin skwad compr…komp… mayd up uv LOLfrens ahmd wiv puddinkwerferschnorglekanonen.

      3. E, F, & G are all correct.

    • turtlol says:

      aggh! Hamm on fyuv, hold teh mayo klinick “Airplane” ref FTW!!

      peas ess….HBD COL

      wood bees my 17th wedding anniversary, too, butz mah husband past on… so gladz I haz lolfrens wif me naows.

    • Cottleston Pie says:

      Um…Mt. McKinley?

    • stend says:

      OMG i so want #1 to be ‘B’ … please let #1 be ‘B’

    • JanetCanHas4Kittehs says:

      Deer, deer lcb. U DID IT!!! get bedder everytiem. Ur brayn. U has it. I wants it.

      • Nooooooo! She be covetin’ mah brane!

        U is kind, J4K, but if u reeds some of teh LOLSAT answers u will sees that there is some peeps here who is skary smrt. It will be vry hard to grade these tests on a curve.

        Which is just as well — get hit by a car? DO NOT WANT.

  5. Pick says:

    Kitteh wants garden wizrd to open up portle to kitteh levle

    • Ambercat says:

      No moar rassenfassen pooter gaymes! We wuz havin a nys burfdai tee partee fore COL in teh larst postie an rassenfasse Woar ob teh rassenfassen Werlds wuz goan on awl arown us! Enuff awlreddy! Plai nys an hav a pees ob COL’s burfdai caek! Itz shayped lyk a pees ob cheez an has choklit myces awn it!

  6. Swampy says:

    I tink he knowz ware to get gud pricez on hotelz an rentle carz.
    Sneeky basstud not tellin me.

    • KittehLurve says:

      teh travling noam!!! we findz him!! he hidin frum teh angree hoomins hoo not has good travels wif his deels. Kitteh will eet him fur us.

  7. odp says:

    8 votes and only 3 burgers and it gets promoted to the front page?!

  8. Romeow says:

    He knowz sumpin,
    n mah pointy ends r gonna git it outta hims!

  9. Paul says:

    Kitteh nos the gnome iz Irish – werz the pot of gold to turn into CHEEZEBURGERS?

    • Ambercat says:

      he spended it awn ginness an iz nao too pissed to notiss tehr’s a duck cr*pping awn his hand!

      • Tiny Cheezburger & Angel Catburger says:

        ROTFLMAO

        fankoo Ambarkat, dat gived meeh a gud guffaw

        aw man, nao I hasta have tinkletime

        • Ambercat says:

          Ai wuz laffin as Ai typed it! Taht’s not so gud akchully; laffin at oen joeks. But sumwun’s got to!

          • Tiny Cheezburger & Angel Catburger says:

            Mine momma duz dat. Her are full ob teh laffins long ‘afore her gets tu teh ponch lyne. Den u has tu WAYT til her STOPS teh laffins, soes her can has finished teh joke.

  10. catalogical humor says:

    kitteh asks,
    does it has a flavour?
    gnome gnome gnome

  11. Romeow says:

    He knowz sumpin,
    butts nawt enuff bout fashon n maek-ups.

    I’z kolor blindz n eben Aye no dat teh shurt doan goes wif teh pants.

  12. Romeow says:

    Aye fink hims flunkt outta Santa skool. Nise beerd.

  13. philene says:

    kitteh sez

    dat gnom he/she confuzd.

  14. naitkat says:

    the nom is onto da kitteh plan to conqr the yoonivrz

  15. Romeow says:

    Haow duz he napz wif hims aiz openz lieks dat?

    Shudda gonz 2 Kitteh Skool stead ov Santa Skool.
    Kittehz r mush betta wif da napzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzz…

  16. Gabe says:

    Iz furst lolnom?

  17. SarahD says:

    But hims suspektz nuthin…

    MUAHAHAHAHAHA

  18. SarahD says:

    NOM(E) NOM(E) NOM(E)

  19. Melissa says:

    STOOPY LIL GNOME!!!!

    Kinda souwnd like stoopy lil ho.

    I cwack mahsef up!

  20. Lydia says:

    would be funnier if it said “He Gnowz”

  21. kathleen says:

    Contempshoous kitteh sez: “I smelled dat.”

    Disingenuous gnome sez:”LaLaLa”

    (Long suffering duck just suffers in silunts.)

  22. feline1979 says:

    I’ll git u mah pritee…u an ur lil ducky 2.

  23. gremlin says:

    butt not apparently how too aplies da bluxher and udder make-ups

    dat nome haz bluxh on hims noze!

    oh, and da lipztick just nawt rite for an “autumn”

    –er, mebbe datz a girl nome unner dat beerd?

    p.s. happy b-day to crazy-old-lady! pass da snaxk – kthxbai!

  24. Nick says:

    Travelosity failz mai garanteeeeee

  25. stefnee says:

    him noze how to save u beeg monies on travl expinsiz, just log on an see, you neber travl alon wen u travl wif da roman nome (Hims name is Migel since he is roman)

  26. kathleen says:

    Travelocity Gnome Disgraced When Duck Fetish Discovered

  27. invisible commenter says:

    no no… teh gnome iz clooless. iz dat duck i’z worried ’bout.

    heez 4 teh whirld dominayshun. u can see it in hiz beedy eyz.

  28. Kim says:

    T mynus 2 owers til trikertreetz tym! Luff to see teh kiddees in der kostooms.

    Happy Halloweensies everbody!

    • CrazyOldLady says:

      My first Halloween in our new little house….I really hope we get some kids!! I sat home last year and only three little kids came by…**sigh*** Dis used to be teh funnest dai!!! Now the kidlets are skeered of goin’ ennywherz but teh malls an stuff.

  29. two_kittehs says:

    I is in ur gardin stalking ur gnomes

  30. MAry says:

    YOU HAVE JUST BEEN KISSED BY SOMEONE WHO CARES FOR YOU!!! SEND THIS TO EVERYONE YOU CARE FOR INCLUDING THE ONE WHO SENT IT TO YOU, ONLY IF YOU CARE FOR THEM!!! SEE HOW MANY KISSES YOU GET!!

    i LO0VE U MORE DAN WO0RD CAN SAY
    i LO0VE U MORE&&MORE ERRYDAY
    i LO0VE U && DAHZ ALL i GAFFA SAY
    CUZ i LO0VE U ND DAHZ HOW iZ GONNA STAY!

    (ENGLiSH) i LOVE YOU
    (POLiSH) JA KOCHAM CiEBiE
    (FRENCH) JE T’AiME
    (HiNDi) HUM TUMHE PYAR KARTE HAE
    (CZECH) MiLUJiTE
    (SLOVAKiAN) LU’BiM TA
    (iTALIAN) Ti AMO
    (UKRAiNiAN) YA TEBE KAHAYU
    (GERMAN) iSH LiBE DiSH
    (CHiNESE) WO Ai Ni
    (GREEK) S’AGAPO
    (HAWAiAN) ALOHA WAU iA Oi
    (LiTHUiANiAN) TAV MYLiU
    (KOREAN) SA RANG HAE YO
    (JAPANESE) Ai SHi TE RU
    (ROMANiAN) TE UBSEC
    (BOSNiAN) VOLiM TE
    (ALBANiAN) TE DUA
    (FiLiPiNO) MAHAL KiTA
    (SPANiSH) TE AMO

    ……
    ..¶¶¶¶¶¶…………¶¶¶¶¶¶
    ….¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶….¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶
    ..¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶……..¶¶¶¶
    ¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶……..¶¶¶¶
    ¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶….¶¶¶¶¶
    ¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶ ..¶¶¶¶¶
    ..¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶
    ……¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶
    ……….¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶
    …………..¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶
    ………………¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶
    ………………….¶¶¶¶

    (¯..v..¯) LOVE YOU..

    WaT BettUh Waii 2 ShOW hoW GUd oF A FriiEnD u ArE
    MwAhSzZzZ

    SeNd DisZ nD SeE How MaNiii U Get BaK

    –> G3t MorE daN 5 uR A Gud FriiEnD
    –> G3t mOrE DaN 10 Ur sUcH a gReAT FriiEnD

  31. myfrisbee says:

    Who dat?

    (btw this kitteh is so byooootiful!!)

  32. karen says:

    derrtie noam tinkin taht stripee kitteh knowz sumthin……butz kittehz lipz is seeled. dun ax, dun tell.

  33. Jennifffuurr says:

    To gno-gno-gno-me is 2 luv-luv-luv me…

  34. Melissa says:

    I noes one fing.
    Nome noes nuffin ’bout applyin makeuppee!

    Dang d00de.
    BLEND! BLEND!!!!

  35. Jenny says:

    botanist kitteh seyz… this spessyman be v unuzual, i wunderz wut gnomenklatchur it belongz too.

  36. Foshizzel says:

    THE GNOME KNOWS SOMETHING!!!! we must finds out wut it iz


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