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Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.
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JB on Breaking News – Cheezburgergal on I lub yu! I missed yu!… gammacat on But wayt! Dere’s mo… pj perry on But wayt! Dere’s mo… gammacat on CATS WHO STARE AT OnleeKitteh on But wayt! Dere’s mo… KayKitteh on But wayt! Dere’s mo… momchan on But wayt! Dere’s mo… KayKitteh on But wayt! Dere’s mo… KayKitteh on But wayt! Dere’s mo… OnleeKitteh on Breaking News – OnleeKitteh on Breaking News – willy boy on CATS WHO STARE AT bluesfan473 on CATS WHO STARE AT PoussinBoi on But wayt! Dere’s mo… 
Cheezburger Network Blog
Yor cawl iz imporrtint 2 uzzzzzzz…..
O, for **&&%$ iffn teh puter iz nott pluggd in, plugg it in. Iffn its awf, turn itt awn. Iffn its awn turn itt awff, wayt, prray, turn itt bak awn & stop #%@** bawtherin mee!
_Plez to b puttin’ puter back inna box an send 2 manufactur. U 2 stupy 2 run dis machin
(Punch line of an old tech support joke heard years ago!)
yes, u 2 stupid!
Hey, I rekogniz yu, RG….yu are MAI I.T. support peep!
I haz acshually answerrd callz where pooter IZ unpluggded.
Also wher network fingy iz unpluggded, or printer iz not connected, or stoopy hoomin hit OFF switch on powerstrip wif big stoopy-hoomin pawz.
We call dis “PEBKAC”–Problem Existing Between Keyboard And Chair.
ID10T Error – let me splain to u
Or az mai dad sez, opuhratur errur.
won I alwaz likd was Bad User on Device!
Ladee sez cupholdr is brok. Shez put cofee cup on diskrive, an itz broke. Ladyee not no thet thingee whut popz out iz diskrive! OV COS IS BROK! Stoopid hooman! This is honez toze gawd truf! Hudbsanz bos comfrim!
1 time I showz uzer how2 reset macheen. 2 daz later, her callz me. Her sais reset dont werk. I saz, “U push reset buttin?” Her sayz, Yeah. I holdin it fur 20 minutes an nuffin happen. take me 5 minuuets to getez voice unnder kontrol. Den I sayz, “U can letz go now.” Her saz, “U genieus. Dat work. It resttin now!” Dis honest to pinkie toeses truff!
no. taek too long to splain. lemme sum up.
I alllso hearz it putt “problem is carbon-based, not silicon”
oh deer…aiz afflicted wif dis PEBKAC diseez, myne own seffs, same tymez Izediagnosticaydiin of callers trbls…lol…dis makes me rofllmao AND eben PMP ! hehe
Grammiekit
WOWz, Rushngreen, I din knoes joo wurked hear wit me too! Dats eggzacly what I do! but Im not ‘lowded to tell name of cumpny.
dis ’splains alot, duzn’t it?
A liddle OT, butt I wanted to bee neer teh top. I just tryed to refur sumwun to link awn rite to Teho’s binglol – and it is NAWT THERE! Or is I just going blind? Or is just my pyooter? do teh rest ov u has it? Hoo knows?
Is gone from front page, but if you click on see more links and scroll down, there is a quick news archive.
u cans yuz dis: http://www.teho.vox.com/library/post/for-icanhascheezburger-binglol.html
hooman, pls to fdisk n format. kthxbai.
Aye kant understandz yoo. Y yoo speaking wit Hindi aksent?
Mebbbe *HIMMI* aksent…
Hello my name is Pradeep…..er Bob.
How can I help you today?
Ugh–usa steels mai thunda, Melissa
mebbe a Himmi aksent…
Hello, mai nayme iz Andrew Anderson, how may aye halp you? Whar iz I located? Oh, I is in Bangalore.
Hai Janet! Heute ist mein Furst gekommen!
(schhhh…)
Wilkommen!!! ich liebe die deutsche sprache.
http://www.earthlingsoft.net/ssp/blog/2005/03/gekommen_um_zu_bleiben
That kwite neat – and well dun. Teho – HOW do u find these things? U and Stend never cease to amaiz mee.
owr yungist teen lieks teh song; we can has it on teh iToonz.
i jus remembrs.
Es geht um die Wurst!!! (Grote family motto!)
Ich kan nicht mehr schlagsanne essen! That’s fun to say!
ich auch, orangenkatzendiener/in!!
jerman wurds iz so brayve. dey doan care hooow lloonngg dey getz!! an i finks da virbs iz in da baxck cause dey r polite – let everfing else go furst.
*eek. dang-birnt f-wurd*
Donaudampfshiffgesellschafftskapitaen.
Endlich! (Was fuer ein Gedaechtniss Du hast!) Ich freue mich sehr fuer Dich. (Wir koennen Einander duzen, nicht wahr? Wir sind ja Alle sehr eng befreundet hier.)
Danke sehr.
Bitte schoen.
tank u fer cawling Dell?
Dis why I got a Mac.
Well Hello! We are happy to take ur call today please explain in detail what your problem is…..zzzzzzzzz
Boyfriend kitteh iz tyred after all nite talkkathon
Not Pikshured Kat sai,
“….so then mi boss sai dat to me, and i sai i dunt kno how u kud sai such a fing,
well, i didnt sai dat but i fort it and i was soooooooooooo mad at hims, i meens, wudn’t u be?
i said, wudn’t u be?
hellooooooooooooooooooo
is u even LISTNIN TU MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE???????????
I hates uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu……..!!!!!!”
I can has Dr. Phil?
Dat floofy belleh is just MAED for snorgling!! WANT!!!
CKL, it’s a TRAP. You’re sure to get all five pointy ends!. That’s how it works with my cat, at least. I still fall for it everytime, tho…
my kitteh Dory lovvvvvvvvvvvves belly rubs she lays on the floor in front of me and begs for dem…………and if she is on the bed I can snorgel her belly and give it kisses…….she never EVER shows me her pointy ends for givin belly attention– I think she mai be part goggie.
)
OMG!! HOW THE HECK did I become Koneko???? Now if THAT isn’t irony….I have never seen it LMAO
Nooooo Gayla!! Don’t go over to the dark side!!!
Every day LITERALLY MILLIONS OF PEOPLE get their id’s stolen on ICHC…..
even if dey DOEZ haz cookiez!
LOLZ literally millions?? heehehe
THINK OF TEH LOLDENTITIES
for gods sake! plzzzz think!
O luk, Gayla. U is U again. Tahtt wuz fast.
My cat lays on her back and lets my husband rub her belly, but if I start coming toward her she flips back over!
U r being dissed BIG TIEM!
Ai has three kittehs an nun of dem liek belleh snorgles…Ai get deh five pointy ends evry tiem. But is totally worth it!
Don’t go towards teh floof!
mai kitteh Dory begsssss for da belly rubs she never ever shows me her pointy ends for rubbin her belly. I can even snorgel n kiss her belly and she adores it– I think she might be part goggie.
)
Mah kitteh Jazzie iz just saym az dat. Ai haz tuu goggies tu n ORL mai nanimalz lubs belly schnorgles
ooohhh lookitti!! orinj spot jus waytin fur my snorggle (cuz I has mewnitty ya noe)
Dontt wurry be happycat is-happy
uups. ment to rite (stoopy humn)
don’t wurry be happycat is- not wurried
hehe
is happilee not wurried!
Technical Support-Kat has a mighty kitteh SEP field goin on…
Ah! FTW!! Ford Prefect be prowd ob uz!
Yesh – mah towel, I haz it.
Towel Day ams on May 25th
Bizarro say it am horibl holeeday
(Me uzed too b3 Anonymouse)
Oh Hai! I helps u. Press 1 fer LOLcat, Press 2 fer Engish.
Teh phoone iz gud pillows
Dose 1-900 ladees rly wares me out.
Whut means “what r u wearing rite now?”
Mai floof purrhaps?
oh nos…….don’t start in with my floofy floofies again…….Janet starts blushing n giggling n stuff…. lol
well – wuz funnie. *giggle, giggle* *blush, blush*
I am warin a bib – das a drippy cheezbrgr.
r u eetin a cheezburger rite naow?
Now, TAHT is relevunt tu r intrests!
From an earlier, more innocent, age…
10 Recognise problem
20 Call technical support
30 Let $=the limit of your patience+10 minutes
40 Wait on hold for $ minutes
50 Don’t be surprised when technical support suggests that you reboot
60 Goto 10
tihs is war my compooter programmin skillz endz. TI basic, tho. weeee! my kitteh likes 2 see mr bojangles dance on teh tv screen.
Basick wuz so gud, ez to lern an yooz.
Den wuz DOS, ez to lern an yooz.
Nao iz html, C++++, Linux, Perl, too mennee!
Sigh.
Rememberz Lotuz 123
I luved Lutuz 123. So eezee to use (once u lerned how, ov corse).
Fonesecks kitteh is tird aftr all nite seshun.
plz send halp kvik, I haz eated too much cheezburgrz
Wen i canz no sleeps, i callz mi mommie. Her singz da lubyoubai an off I goez sleepin da dai away. Mom? MOM?! Y uz singin da pinkie toesies song? I gotz 2 do WHAT? I don no how to pranz!
Mommie kitteh needz to enrol her bebbeh in the werld faymouse LBJones Mewsik Skool of Singing and Dancing.
Az I.T. lolfrend, I resemble dis lol*.
Iz now hangin in my cyoobu…coobic…dat playce wher my desk iz.
Sayme hir! Rite were peeps kans sees it!
Me tu! Me tu! Rite wer da catstomurz kin sees it!
whoah…..echo-echo-echo—-sorry! mah commentz waz NAWT shewin up…stoopy bord!
dis wun wuz mai desktawp bakgrownd foar ovar a munth, just reesintly chaynjd to scrunched up tuxeedo kitteh saying “HMPH!” bekawz mai kustamurrz keepz getting dummur and mai payshintz keepz gettin shoartur
i r TOATULY feelin dis, todai.
riet der wif u, kitteh.
Heer, Teho. Jus fur you. a 16 ownz mowka wif extry spresso. Nawt too hawt. I hoep this will cheer u up a liddle.
Janet, uz bery bery funee and uz bery bery nise. uz staz here, Kthx?
alredy had! thx tho.
Ur welcum Ok – I drinks, cuz I luvs coffee and is nawt too hawt. Hmmmmmm – teh aroma.
O hai, lolcatburgler. Luk. I haz browt u a 16 ownz mowka wif extry spresso (nawt too hawt), too. Is very delishus. Teho haz gud tayst.
teh cofeyshop peeps maed me a “mowka steemr” todai fr sumfing difrunt. is veri gud.
is very gon, tu, nao.
Mmmmm – sounds liek sumthin to trai. Wunder if owr coffee shops around heer has such a thing.
Teho – since u r a coffee lover – haz u been to Italee? I don’t know whut tehy do taht is so different frum everwhar else, butt teh spresso and cappuchino tehre just can’t be beet. Verry strange. U r in Austria – drink coffee – very gud. 1 kilometer down teh road – cross border. Stop at first coffee bar. Drink coffee – sheer heaven.
not gon ther yet. sumdai. spreizinglee gud cofeyshopz in Lumdon, tho. dey is can DEFNITLY be fans of teh Talyun sort of cofeys ther.
Yesh maam. Jus plugz it in an turns it awn.
*sigh*
yesh maam jus turnz it awn.
U can’t see ICHC?!!! I gits suprvizer, she will noes what to do! We will gits ur ICHC back onlinez, donut panic!
Dat happened to mee just dis morning – and I DID panic – and I DID call tech support and they DID tell mee to turn off pyooter and lectricitee and turn awn ( and wait wait 20 seconds befoar turnin pyooter awn) – and – as u see – heer I AM!
“Has u tried turneng it awf and on agen?”
(U guyz should luk up The IT Crowd on YouTube. Is just lyk dis!)
Heerz teh clip…
a mechanical engineer, an electrical engineer, and a computer programmer are all stuck in a stopped car.
M.E.: “I’ll just get out, pop the hood, and have a look see”
E.E: “Ehh, maybe I’ll just try turning the key in the ignition…again”
C.P: “Well, why don’t we all get out and get back in and see if it starts then?”
C.P: “…and close all the windows, then try opening them again.”
I called tech support the other day, and immediately hung up. The voice on the other end was american so I knew it was a wrong number
Ur blu screen of deff bores me. Jus turns off then ons, I’s goin back to mah naps. kthxbai.
Minor problums kan be ignord. Big wuns kan be sleeped thu.
Ai lieks dis fillossofee!
If u think this kitteh might relly be talking on da fhone right now……
you might be a chezneck.
‘weeboot yer peesee leidi.”
When I wurkt, ma compooter awlways brekkin cuz I wurkt mennee programs at wunce.
It get stuck, an I COODENT turn it awf! It wooden turn awf unless yoo crawl unner da desk an unplug it! Much PLEH!
But soon dey gived me a faster pooter frum a manager who got a noo pooter. Sigh. Why nawt giv da compooter YOOSER da faster pooter, an giv da mgr my pooter so dey can see dey got nuffin to complayn abowt!!!
Nao I’z home bodee, wif 2 pooters to yooz! I liek ma lappie, in da tv room wif da fast RAMS!
yu letz teh sheep in yur house, B!?????
Wehn I wuz fiev, a ram neerlee runned over mee cuz I wuz teesin him (mucth liek Teho). Don’t be teasin teh rams – spechullee in teh house. Cud bee dangerous.
i downt see hao i resembul dat staytmint, akshuly…?
Confess, Teho. U haz a sekret program whereby eny tiem “Teho” is menshuned, u know instantelee whar to go. I’m gunna start hidin “Tehos” awl over teh playce to see if u can find them!
Oh – I guess I am alreddee doin taht!
yez… i pres Ctrl-F in mah WWWindo. i tyeps “teho”. i clix “Next”.
is program, but is so not sekrit.
Sekret to mee – butt most of these things r. I KNEW it must be sumthing – no way u cud have been finding sum of the longer past things – unless u just lived here, constantlee surfing fur “Teho” sightings. And since I know u have a life and a job and CO – had to be otteer splanahun.
Whut is a WWWindo?
WHOA! Dunt trai to google it. I thot I cud find awt fur maiself. NOT.
i jus ment WWW browsr windo. u noe, FyrFawx, InnertubesEsploder, Hoppra, Suffary…
but i send u monais!11!! D;
Has u tryed turning da monitor on? Iz very mych common misteak…
“how iz teh wether dere?”
(Sigh) “Fine”
“it iz teh hawt heer liek a cao on fyr”
“ware is u? Florda or Cali…Kali…dat state wit al teh moovee starz?”
“Im in teh India”
“Wate…Indeeanna?”
“Noes…India”
“WTF? Y m I payin 4 tek suprt 2 3rd wurld contree 4 compooter bilt in Japan n mayd n Merika?”
iz teh globelizeshun, dats wy. i can haz eekwel opperchewnitty emploimint?
Stoned Kitteh is ordurring a pizza.
But has got flumuxeded by dial tone.
“Hai…. hai…
plz to deliver… hai?
Helloooooos? Hai….. yesss….
I can has two large pizz-piez.
CHeezburgrrr toppings….
Hai… hai….
Is u writing dis downs?
Hai… yesss…… ummm…..
Hellos?”
I was waiting for this one to make it frontpage. It’s so funny! LMAO
Comcast Kitteh is repairing ur internets
hay! ai wur gonta zayz dat. leest, comcast kitteh iz fur kyooter dan da sleepi comcrap d0od. an comcast kitteh akshully fikses yer innernetz. an comcat yoozes les ub da cowch an him haz purrz, to.
I wuz gonna kall somebudey. Den i wuz oberwelmd by da sofness ov da pillo an da kowch.
(Wiggle)
Jus lemme get– (Snerk-snerk) Comfabul–
(Wiggle)
Snnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnzrrrrrrrrr
ai cannut studie naow. teh pillow is sendin dedly rays uv napping and ai jus kant help meselfff……
long time visitor, first time commenter.
this pic made me and my co-worker lol and lol.
i work for cust.service/tech support for a projection screen company.
this is just like my office!
hai, charlie b. Let me be furst to say – nice to heer frum u! Speek up eny tiem. Butt u knows taht!
did u noes u kan git tech support on da web? is true! goes to aitch tee teepee dash forwrd slash forwrd slash dubya dubya dubya icanhascheezburger won wurd dot com, click on service, enter service key numba (see sticka on bottoms of cpu) fill in regeerayshun form, crate eyedee and paswrd, wate 4 konfirm emale, klik on konfirm link, log in, go to faq. kthxbai! (click ooooooooooo)
FTW!
but if yu can’t GET teh web……how yu gonna get teh tech support??? Jus sayin….
all in all its jus ‘nother brick in da wall….
iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
haz becom
cumfterblee nom
stil raynin heer in Gimmesoda. pleh
Still sunnee and hot here in hades…I mean Floridee
about 10 inches of rain today in nw Florida and one tornado very pleh much damage
It be rain all dai in Noo Orleenz. Much pleh.
Pinq Phloid!!! FTW!
(uzed 2 b3 Anonymouse)
To git hired in Indeeya, iz simpull Engrish test:
Yooz da werds green, peenk an yello in a sentenss.
“Hokay. Da fone goze ‘green green’. Yoo peenk it up an sey ‘Yello?’”
Yoo iz hyred!!
i thinks Technical Support Cat and Toylet Cat went to teh same partee last nite?
Ceiling Cat haz observed taht
1-900-addicted Cat is satisfied now
Attentive Cat
Is takin a teensy break.
Damn, your english sucks.
Owr inglish sux, butt knot as gud as ur mom [snork]
him not eben spel “@$$h0le” riet.
U silleh. We r nawt speekin English. Butt ur English seemz a bit crood n rood. Wai u haz such a stranj nayme?
ya, is teh othr end wut shud do teh tawkin.
Damn, talk about outsourcing tech support.
yep teh kittehz iz teh nu ekonomie
Apple tek spprt. What, yer iphone don’z werk no more? Stoopy geeky hooman, no wantz 3rd partee prograams, pleese to bui new iphone. -kthkbai
plz leave a mesagez after beep. BEEPZ!
wwweeeeee thats my kitteh =] <3
for real
Congrats! Verry floofy an kyoot! An tallented tu.
ComCat Customer Support. Bin deelin wif dese idits 4 6 munts. Switched to Verizon. Luvved teh hapi face pillow.
I thought that cat worked for Comcast
I werk for a tek suppoart cumpany…its not so grate, ackshually.
I noes its not awlways pplz fawlts wen dey have no computator aptitoodes, but I’ve got sum reely stoopy kweshiuns. Maik my hed sad.
Wutz reely fun iz wen dey get mad at yous foar no reezin! Lyke itz MY fawlt dat dere internets are downs in dere area! DO NOT WANT!
(PS: Dis are reely late comment! Needs to gets bak on teh bawl!)
lol. lol.. I feel the same way about apple support.
Custumer suport is importants.
With all these comments, this page took like a half hour to load.
And I’m not helping
Kitteh werks 4 microsawft