Whutzzat!?!
Quik, hidez! I think mah parentz iz home!
photo: ICHCF
capped and submitted by: Ann
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Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.
erojenus zone….
I has it.
(dis mah NUMBA WON erojenus zone, baybee)
/ai is sneekeh jeneeus
//owch! pulled a mussel patting mahself on teh bak)
top kitteh sez - “relax babe iz jus teh wind”
Shud have sed….
Ur erojenus zone…. I has it….
Or
In ur erojenus zone….
Fancyng ur tikle.
I chokd on da f presur.
noes! is teh funnee - no second gessing! gud fur(st) yu!
hehe
Ah cungrajulates u …
*fee-uls sad frum votez*… not reely congratulatin ME….I is REELLY congratulating Eleanor for teh FIRST POST in a clebber non Teho-smacked way…LOL!
[beeg wiyd imnosent aizez]
U sed u wuz sixteen, rite?
BUZTID!!!
…when she wisperd wut wz that?
I thinks thes no1 ther
Thas mai dad outside the car!
o plz the keys….
as I tried to tell her dad it wuz her mouf that i wuz kissin…..
hehehe nickelback…. theze kittehz are in fact animals
Wun ov teh most terrifying momentz ov teenajhood is heer reenacted by teh “Katz fur Whirled Peas” tehatrical troupe, an enlightend grooop ov Catzbians trying to edjukate Hyoomin bebbehs awn how tu survive in teh haus with adultz.
IS BIDNEZ TIEM AGEN!
wokka wokka wokka
Flight of the Conchords ref FTW!
Hey, Teho, tanks fer dat link an comment…didn think annywun wud notyce!
Woah! Dat dore iz eggzit only!
NE 1 member the Gomer joke “thats not my finger either”
LOL, I sed it to hubbee jus da uvver day!
“Wha Gomer, tha’s nawt ma bellee buttom!”
HONEY!
mmm?
I smell smoke? Are the kids ok? Maybe it’s a burglar! Did you lock the door?
mmm hmmm?…zzzz
Whut you means i grounded for life !!!!!!!!!!!!
T3e shoked luk on t3e syumeezs face is prysless. FTW!!!!!
Meezers are fun that way. However generations of British royal-family-scale inbreeding has made a lot of them about as sharp as a bowling ball…
Dey is bery sharp wen it cums to shreddin teh curtins, I kin asshure u.
… an bitn stoopi hoomuns whooz tryst to pet dem….
mai 1/2 meezer when I was a kitten cud get u dubl whami teef an nails pow! pow!
momcat
Twue, but sum of tehm tawk. Lyk mai neyborz kitteh, Cammeh, wun tym she wuz owt reel laet and wuz in owr backyard. Taht Cammeh, she has teh violens, so I duzzint pick her up.
So I sez, “Cammeh? U wants to go hoam nao? Iz ur bedtyme.”
An Cammeh sez, “Nyo.”
And I wuz lyk, “Oh, u duzzint wants to go haom ryte nao? Ok.”
Den I goez… “Wait, whut????”
R linkspoynt, Kimba, wuz liek dat too!!
She say ma fayvrit candee: Mownz!
Anyone else old enuff to member Fat Freddy’s Cat by R. Crumb? He stood by the door and said “Me out? Me out now? Prowl now!” I lubs dat. My kittehs say dat all de tyme.
Not Crumb! Gilbert Shelton (Austin boy). Anybody remember Wonder Warthog?
Tanks for de corre…curek…tellin me da rite thing! All this time I thot de Fabulous Furry Freak Bros were R. Crumb. Lurn sompin new evry day!
Is VERY common misteak. Meny peepls thinks taht - sumtiems includin me. I still has mai Fat Freddy’s Cat t-shirt!
girl
no means no!!
feller
aww, sugar! dont be like that! no one will see my wee love bite back here.
Twelf
Hurray fur Brane Ded! Twelf is a moat esteemed position! (12 months, 12 dancing princesses, 12 days of Christmas, 12 apostles - etc) Plus - is 2 x 6 - mai lukky number, so I thinks is the dubble lukky (too).
OK - nobuddy - NOBUDDY give me enymoar voats. Nawt that’s very liekly. I can’t beleeve it - 12 voats! Is - is . . .?????
U funneh, Brane Ded…l likez ur name, too
dear godz, ur paw iz cold! get it away frum ther!
an wun day u will sez to urself,
dis r not mah beeyootifl howse…
dis r not mah beyootiful car…
oh sheetz! Dis r not mah beeyootiful wife!!
Talkin Heds FTW!
an yu wil ask yerself
hey Self! hao teh H!!!@LL did we git heeya??!!??
“oh sheetz” LOL *snorts tabouli out of nose*
owchie, taht’s gotta hurt.
oh sheetz! dat nots tabooly!
(erghh… sry)
oooo dats teh spot!
Akkk! is heinielik-heiml-haim…anti choking maneuver. cheezburgr goes down rong pipe. kitteh in back preforms life saving tekneique and iz hero. gets photo in paper, keys to city and comen..cemon…letter from fyre detpatment saying good job!
At leezt, dat whut dey tellz da symeez’s parints.
“Yep. onnist. She wuz chokin, mr. and mrs symeezkitteh. I had to do teh manoovur, an teh mouf-to-mouf, an’ datz when u walkd in. THANK GAWD U HEER, PLIZ KALL 911, dey shud chek hur owt at teh hossibul. And, um, I’ll juz put mah pantz bak on whyle u kall, okeh?”
You not Siameeeez, so U don’t, pleeez!!!!
Lady and the Tramp FTW!
…but wich iz wich?
We is Siameeiz if you pleeiz
We is Siameeiz if you don’t please
We is former residents of Siam
There is no finer cats than we am
We is Siamese with very dainty claws
Pleaz be observing paws containing dainty claws
Now we lookin’ over our new domicile
If we like we stay for maybe quite a while
Hold stills
I himelicks u
Hineelicks? Oooo, keenkee!
*SLURP!*
Wut? Iz taht a video camra? U wuz TAYPIN taht? If dat enz up on U-Toob we are OVAH !!
Britney Spers and da gardner have a plant parenhood discussion
… iz dat abowt plantin’ seedz in da furtle playss so dey grow? I fink I had dat tawk. Bof wif my huzbin… an also wif my bottinee teechur. My bottinee teechur sez I iz be gud at teh plant parenhud.
Wayt. whut?
soo………..elf haz affair wif bottinee teechur?? film on UTube later today…. LOLZ
Well… I meen,. if u kall him givvin’ me sum seeds an’ me plantin’ dem in da bakyard *an affair*, then shur. Whutev.
Hims wyf, hoo iz teh KRAEZEE FREEK WUMMIN FRUM HELLZ fink I havin’ teh afayr wif him… Kuz him tookd me on feeld trip to park/lake to luk foar fossilz. Sins it wuz summur, I weared a swimmysoot (wun-peese pliz, kuz I iz pudgyfat) wif a payr ov jeenz…. Teh swimmysoot, it had teh krizzkross strapz in teh bak, wuz kyut an tazteful, an, I thot it wuz appropryit foar teh waring to teh layk, u kno, in teh summur, whut wif jeenz.
Him tookd piktorz of sum ov da rokz, an’ wun ov dem pixshurz him kinna got me bending down to pik up da big rok, an him got piktor lyk RITE DOWN MAI KLEEVIJ.
Well, I meen, I nont rilly kare, Him’s 67, rite, jeez, let da guy tayk a piktor if him wuntz, is nawt lyk I wuz nakkey or nuffin. Evin mai huzbin, u kno, dat guy I married to for 4 hole yeerz?!?! HIM!?!? DAT WUN?!? Him wuz lyk, “o hay, I nont blaym da guy, u gotz sum guud kleevij, yah!”
Well, himz wyfe dacided diz iz PROUF!!!!!!! dat we iz having WYLD TORRID AFFAYRE!!! *headdesk* zhe sawd deez piktorz, kuz him nawt fink der nuffyng rong an him showd da piktorz to hur dat wuz on hims kamra, der wuz menny piktorz nawt of teh Elfi. Well, den she gottid varee mad, zhe kalld me, damand to kno why I iz marryd but I “dress awl sexy” foar hur huzbin. I lyk, wtf u krayzee biznach iz teh swimmysoot, u no harazz meh nomoar. Her sai FYNE I kawl ur huzbin, I TELL HIM EVRIEFING! I like… um… ok, u kawl my huzbin. U tellz him I wored a swimmysoot to da layk in da summur. Nok urself owt, u krayzee koot.
Den she tuukd da piktorz to da lokil poleez dapartmint, an’ fyld a poleez raport dat I iz bad stoodint, horing to my profezzur, she raportid me foar talking to her huzbin when I at skool (IN HIMS KLASS!!), an’ even … *GAZP!!* avtur zkool wuz on brake frum summar to fall turm. Az evvidens ov mai horeing an’ evulniss, she prodoosd hims diggitul kamra, whish her stoled frum him. Da poleez wuz lyk… O.o Uh whut? but her inzist der be poleez raport bakuz I sush a evul wontin hore. O. An’ I threttind hur. I sed if she kawld mai huzbin I wud knok hur out. Varee threttiny, her afrayd foar hur life, yeth, varee. Gazp gazp. She evin had to draive bye my hows, in the uthar town, um sevril timez, whut to maek shur we wuz still hoam an nawt kom foar teh hurt hur.
Yep.
Dats whut taykingz of teh bottinee will git u.
–Elfi
dat KLEEVIJ be needin a bullsh!t proof vest!! po elf!!
OMG Elfi! what an experience! I had NO idea the can of worms I opened……QUICK sumone stuffs dem back in so Elfi can exhale! Hang in there gf u nawt a bad person atall! Dat lady just jealouz, mebber her cleveage not so much…. donno. :D)
Yu poor floozie, yu!!! Just kiddin, Elfi!! we all luz yu and no how hard yu be workin at gettin yur skoolin….you wun smat youngin, dat’s for shur. Tell dat ol ladee to get a reel life an get outta yurz!! Or better, have your huzband tell her dat!! She be too insekure…makes me feel kinda sorree for her-but jus a little! Yu keep bustin teh curve in yur klasses an make us prowd!!
Me wunder wat da bottinee perfesur plantz in hims gardens…. Mebbe his whackdudle wify et sumthin ferny….
Dat mus be some kinda cleevage…!!1!
An yay to yur hubbeeman fur beein so liek, whutever bowt da non-ishoo! An also fur appresheeyatin da cleevij!
Yoo jus go on an keep makin da meedeeogre wimminz skeered, cuz yoo is da smrt an happee!
We luffs ya, elfloozie!!!