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Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.
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pj perry on Switchboard operator kitt… Blue on Switchboard operator kitt… 5 eagles on u’z not doin well at dis… momchan on We has problem. pj perry on u’z not doin well at dis… momchan on u’z not doin well at dis… pj perry on u’z not doin well at dis… kafleen on u’z not doin well at dis… momchan on u’z not doin well at dis… Trewzdaze on If you close it cweenmj on u’z not doin well at dis… sweetpea on It’s the Fyumi Gator on It’s the pj perry on u’z not doin well at dis… momchan on u’z not doin well at dis… 
Cheezburger Network Blog
FLOOF-DIVIN’ TIME!!!
u cans snikr an maek all teh smart-azz catcals u wants. i nots cayr.
kitteh = ♥ LUV ♥
I highlee speckz there are those hoo may snikr – but teh amayzin floofy bellie – well – if u cudn’t maek the “snikry” comment nao, wehn cud u? Resisteunz is fyootile when confronted with such a kitteh bellie.
Sorta looks like an open invitation dont it?
Teho would be the “first” to know, huh…snicker snicker poke poke
i stil nots cayr.
[fingers in ears]
la la la la doot doot do be doooo…
GACK! Couldz it be a FIRST time for Teho??? HAHAHAA
Bold, gayla34, very bold!! I wuz gonna do it and cudn’ kwite summon up the nerv. I wud get a slow, sad hedshake!
(And I LOVE teh “GACK!” Wuz same sound as in my hed.
I only do it 4Janet because I know u has my back
) And Teho can take a lil ribbing 
)
oh… n I waz gonna say……Leaf started it…… LOL
U r rite, Gayla34 – I do indeedy hav ur bak! We’z best budz!
tanks
) I concur– and u mays jus call me gayla lol
And u mays call mee Janet.
aw, nao i wantz teh canibar.
YU SEDZ IT TEHO!!! TAKE A BIG BREFF AN GO FOR IT!!!
Luvz to rub ur belleiz
Belliez whut I luvz to rub.
PUUUUUUuuuuuurrrrrr.
i can has mousies song?
Love to eat them mousies
Mousie’s what I love to eat
Bite they little heads off
And nibble on they tiny feet.
Kliban FTW!!!
We used to have a beach towel with that one.
Ai still has wun! Akshully – trhee!
I haz dat on a coffay kup. Kliban FTW!
Da cookie jar iz da espensive collecterbull! But sooo stylin!
i luuuuv dat sawng!
any tiemz kitteh – I rubz ur bellie, DEN U BITZ ME!
Zacklee -
IT’S A TRAP!!!!
aAaaaaahhhh! Just as I see dis new kitteh, it bee tam to go to wurk!!!
Noooooooooooo….
Rub the belly? Yeah right. IT’S A TRAP PEOPLE!!!!!! RUUUUUNNN!!!!
agen, we noes.
sum fings is wurf it.
Teh tummmey trap git U!
Make me feel lik Charlie Brown an der feetball. Nxt kitteh b named Lucy.
Can. Not. Resist. Belly. Rub. Trap.
>attakz wit awl 5 poyntee endz<
*getting bandages & alcohol & neosporin*
Is wurrf itz, innit, Bizkitmama?
Teh fine line between S and M, let me show u it.
{B wishes code gawn, can smell hubbee’z feromoans… WANT!}
Hurtz so gud.
sumtiems luv dont feele liek it shuld
yup…sumtymz it feelz liek teh bizinus end uv stayt pinz!
Ai mus b teh lukiyest hoomin’ – nebber does ai get teh poyntee bits wen ai schnorgelz mah kitteh bellies…nebber!
Nebber?
…sigh…Now that’s just not fair….
Whut is it? Training? Breeding nice+ to nice+ over several generations?
This lot may dein to grant a walk-by scratch as they go to Momma for a rubdown.
And she’s a DOG PERSON!!!! Nope, don’t unnerstand.
I dun unnerstan eever. I been kitteh mawmee fur 35 yeers. Gogeez bellehs I kin rub, scritch, maek em kick, whutever…
But kittehs? I cannot be tuchin dem. Frenz an all come ober, can rub an skritch an shnorgle. I try tuch bellee, I get eever pointee enz or bubye butt…. Dunno why. Ma kitteh’s were all gud well behayv sweet, but, Mawmee no tuch da bellee. Sumtiemz gitta shnorgle WIllem… sigh…
Me neether, my kittehz (of substanz) b lurrrrrrrrrrvin’ the bellie rubz. N my ex-kitteh 2!
Ys, at mai plais, we callz dis “teh bear-trap pose”.
An after ya rub mah belleh yoo can skweeze mah peenk footpads
I keeps moving mah legs but I not gettin ennywere
Jah kitteh luk lyke dem beetullz dat get fleeped ober frum fall auff starez n deh legs b moobin all slo n schtuff…
wander hao long til dey figger out “uhh nawt goin anyware dis wai”
I’ve fallen… and I doan wanna git up!
Derz nuthin liek uh gud bellee rub in teh morenin
REPRIEVE…..! a kitteh unsaddled by work, time schedules…for a little while at least… wunnerful….
Dis kitteh ben partaayin wit “not alcoholic kitteh. Hab fluffy belley now. hab hugey hed inna mornin.
….den youse garanteed gude luk!
invisible medicine ball
(vizibul OOF)
….4 LUK.
booda kitteh
needs to put on a few pownds
Lookit me–passed awt fom the starvashuns
OH POOR KITTEH!
Dis is similar to wat my big gurl duz btwn mealtimez (we iz tryin to help her lose wate)… only she cries & cries with so much teh pitiable sobs, i says she is sayin, ‘O mom i iz STARVEN TO DETH! I KNOW I IZ!” I sez to her, ‘honey u cood live off your body fat for a monf at LEAST!”
I noes!! Dey twy to mak u tink der starvin and den wen I eatz somfin…. da lookz!…..well ya woodin bileef
Mine lubs to trik us. I feedz dem b4 I goes sumware, den my husband gits home and dey akt lyke dey STARVEN and he feedz dem agin. Liddel monsturs!
Back when I shareded a partment mah roommate would getz up earlier than me. Mah kitteh wud gives her his pitiful “i’m starvin’! Mah mama no feeds me enuf.” routine and she would give him some fuds then leave for werk. Then he would jump up on mah bed and meow in mah face to say “Mama! Wakes UP! I is teh hongry! Feeds me afoar I pass out, kthx.”
His ebil plan would have worked, too, if only he diddent meow in mah face with his bref stinkin’ of kitteh fuds!
Mai male kitteh “Rigel” is sooo plump & roundd about deh middel, people keeep askin mei “when ur kitteh hav her kitties??”
I laff & say – “HE’s NOT expectin’ He’s just fat…” I liv wid 6 kittehs – he cleens hiz plate & ebbryone else’s.
Ronniecat, taek total foodz, deevieds nto littel mouffulls n feed kitteh littel kibbles evry 2-3 owrs so kitteh not feelz starven n kitteh wll lieks u moar.
Thanx 4 teh sujestyn – she iz getten speshul hi-fibah fud from teh vet to help. her dad and i both work so i feed her in teh mornen, then her dad walkz home from werk at lunch to feed her (awwwwwwwwww), den i feedz her after work, den her dad feedz her “snacky” at teh bedtime… She lost 1pound at last annual visit frum year be4, vet wants 1 pound a year until she’s at a better wate. (She is a little over 11 now.) So not ebry 2-3 ours, but sevrl small meels a day. She just complanes cuz she knows she makez me feel gilty!!!1!!
she’s at 11 and the vet wants her to lose more? Well, your vet would be quite disappointed in my 16 pounder. Diet food and all, he’s “big boned” *wink*
Mah Louie done looz wait, 2!
He down to 24 1/4 pounds frum 25!
(An yes, he be seein vet… an she sez OK. BTW, dis iz wut starred uff legul perfessnal rant!)
Be watchful of de big kitteh..my 20 poundr got diabetes and almost died from itz…they get Type II just like humans who are heavy. : ) Vetty-bean can check for this regularly for you when you go in.
Mah Memphis is 17 pounds, but he a biiiiiig kitteh, an not jus in dah belli. I worriz doh, cuz I no wants him to getz diabeetus liek his momma. De vet sayz he ok rite nao.
tanks for ur sujestion, Kitty… she is getten speshul hi-fiber fud from teh vet. her dad and i both werk all day so i feed her in teh mornen, then her dad walkz home from werk at lunchtime to feed her (awwwwwww), then I feed her after werk, then her dad gives “snackie” at teh bedtime. So sevrl small meels a day. She is 11 poundz, she lost a pound at teh lazt annual chekup and teh vet was vrry pleazed, says “plz to lose 1 pound a year until she is in better shape”.
But OH HOW SHE CAN CRY, especially if enebodi walkz in teh direction of teh food dish! it is a simphony of teh barbaric howlz and pitiful cries!
LOL, eether teez by onlee giv WUN kibble wen walk by and rest uv food at skedyoolld tiemz, r distract wif shinee toy?
Ma bowlin bawl wood onlee eet wun kibble et a tiem, but had uvver problems dat prevented wayt loss. sigh…
I free fed my kittehs, even when I had 3 dey were gud wivvit… Sumtiemz supplemint wif gushifud… Willem wuz 14 pounds, but SKINNEEE!!! He liek 4 feet lawng from nozetip to tayltip, and furree!!! I takt him to vet, an pord him owta da crayt, vet tappin foot, sayin “jus how lawng IZ dis guy?!!” LOL!
Oops, sorry, “Kitteh” not “Kitty!”
mai mommas kittehs jus wok in kitsch-en an sit, starin at thayr fud bowl. An den thay lookses up at us wit dat sad pittyful look, an lookses bak at fud bowl. Dis sumtimz go on fur a whyal.
One ob dem speshuly not liyk belleh rub. Udder one duz wut we call hur “callander gurl”poze
When ma reel frends kittehz doez dhiz, we sez 2 dehm daht dehyz faydin awai 2 a mowntayne.
I can has mornin secks?
oof. kitteh tummeh iz not gud. Chikin soop, plz. Kthx
Tucksee Kitteh wantz
Belleh Rubz. Willz goez 2 grayt
lengffz 2 ackwyrz dem
Hewminz no can has
resisstz t3h fluffee tummee.
Kitteh knoez dis well
Kitteh heeerz t3h “Awwwww!”z
uv Prittee Wun. Prellyuud 2
sensuual deelyte!
Jack.
an skywokits in fwight!!! (k? well mebe nawt so much dis teh funniez…or too obvi…oobe…nebermind kant tink ob anyting morz)
Enveesable harlee?
En mah hus, dis be called “Pr0n. I has it.”
Snorgle snorgle snorgle!!!! Kitteh tummeh = happy place!
Dis mah “possum” impweshun. U lyk??
Arrrrrgghhhhh.
I dedz.
dedz kitteh r ded.
*paws 4 moment of silence*
4 paws moment of silenz?
…befoar teh storm?
I’z ded of mai own kyoot!
Who showd kitteh a mirror?!?!
Mirrorz super-dangerous 4 kyoot kittehs!!!1!
Mah perdeh pinkeh padzes, let me show joo all fore of dem…
seee..tolded joo dey tayke joo harballz if joo permaneent rezzdent…
The wild tummycat, or Felis domesticus ohgodmyhandus. Over many generations, it has honed a hunting mechanism unique to the animal kingdom. Rather than stalking its prey in the manner commonly attributed to its domesticated cousins, it situates itself upon its back and waits. The favoured prey is the common human, Homo gullibus, an instinct-driven species particularly susceptible to this method of hunting. Indeed, many of these creatures may even instate a tragic and sometimes graphic response known as snorgling. Some debate exists within the scientific community as to whether F. d. ohgodmyhandus and the snorgle-favouring F. d. spicycranius warrant separate taxonomy, or whether they are a single subspecies adapting in differing ways to the reactions of their prey.
“homo gullibus” Yep, dat be me! Love this!
Yaz!! Snorgle alertt! Iz going in!!! Iffen Iz not back in 5 minutez, kome get meh & br1ng deh Izodine!!!
Den Iz go backk & t1cklez dem kewt pink toez – at l3ast deh toez I tickle cant scratz meh!
(S3riously skratchd Homo gullibus led awai 2 a qui3t plase 2 recobber…)
“LOLCatland Who’s Who…”
(Only teh Catnadians will get dat…)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hinterland_Who’s_Who
(I can’t post teh html linx for sum reeson, the posts don’t sho up. Maybe itz cuz i can has teh Firefox?)
ronniecat
Ha, Iz Canadian, I getz it. i even hearz da musics
Elevendybillion cheeze burgers 2U!!!!
Snorgle Trap! My Puck Kitteh doez all teims.
mah b/f? he callz it dah “RAIIID” poze, like da com..cu…ads ware da bugz killd ded permannent.
Eider way – snorgle snorgle then YOWWWW wen da pointy enz hit da hed.
LOL @ kwoet-B/F-kweschin-kwoet. u can has Mabey Babey?
(wuz spozta be repli to dapanferkitteh… wups)
uh oh! we not shew b/f dat kwestion marc – i not mean dat!!!!
ha–we calls dis pose teh Tummee of Death. R tuxie James can has beeg white tummee. Wen the odder cats gits ruff wid him, he does dis and dey baks off cuz he has all five pointy enz free, an dey has to stand on sum of deres.
So *that* explains why some cats think on-your-back is a good fighting position!
Wuz thinking like Human fighting…on-your-back is bad, bad, bad position for fighting!
Oh, yeh – they get them big hind feets raking and its time to bak off!!
Can yu say “disembowulmunt”??
Hyoomuns not got such gud hine feets for that.
SLUTTY CAT
IS SLUTTY
DAMMMIT !!!
you took my comment…..ARRRRRRRRGH
oh go ahed. u nevar can has tu much sluty.
ehheemm! boyz will be boyz — as fur us girls — we can has too much shlutty!
Ackshully mai firs tought wehn I seez tihs pic waz “i went to collidge wit a girl like dat”
Bery frenly girl.
BERY frenly.
Gurl wit rownd heelz, or wit a matress tyd 2 her bak, zo she coud sai “hello” 2 her frends prawperlee?
And mane porpoise of her undies waz to keep ankulls warm.
Thot az much.
Iv U gez it in dah rite playc, dehr iz nebbah 2 much schlutti. In dah rong playce, NE schlutti iz 2 much.
kitteh is awl reddy to bees huffed! I do has orange maine coon kitteh wif luvlee floooofy white belleh what duz this and waits to be floof-dived. Much kitteh huffage! member, the orange wunz f*#k u up reeeel good!
B kareful, doan git caut huffin kittehs at werk. Boss kin tell bai alls teh fluffage suffd up ur nozes!
Mos compnees has a zeero-tolrinse polasee on kitteh huffrs nowdayz.
Randum floof tesstin
Is vile ashun of ma hyoomin rites!
Practicing mechanic skills -
Replacing broken exhaust manifold
On invisible catmobile!
My kittehs do this….and juss as I position my self for some serious bellah nibblz, i getz da wabbit kiks in da face….
Wy do da kittehs be teazin me ?
All I wan to do is LURVE !
I teenk ah lahks dis post teh best…
so twu, so twu…
*sigh*
Dis iz kitteh vershun ob Russian Rulette –
Mebbe hooman getz skratched, meybe kitteh jus purr, maybe DIS tim3 no skratch, but Next Time???
Mi kitteh Daisy will grabb my hand wid gentle teeth and s0ft klaws & lett Mom twirl her round n round on bak – Daisy much like.
But den s0metimez klaws not so soft!!!
But alzo fun to putt heavie glove on an let Kitteh GO To TOWN!! Fun to watch – no hurt (unles glov fall off, den many ouch!!!!!)
…and dis yogeh posishun i caldz “bellie snorgle salutayshun”. i kan holdz it foar hourz.
ALIEN FACEHUGGER KITTEH
IS PATIENT
…AND CLEVERLY DISGUISED
“….Next week on Doctor Who”
… *ahem* U MAY RUB MY BELLY! … Hello? Dis ting awn??
(Wen mai beegle want rubz, she lais down loudlie. If you doan run 2 her, she kranes her hed aroun 2 maik SHUR U seez her)
me sayz not 4 teh kitten pr0n, omg
Flatulent Cat is Flatulent.
…an jus playn flat
WANT
An dey lieks to akt all digniffyed! Mai Maxie Cat no can has dignittee enny moar, He gets into a lap or onto da bedd and iff you pets him, purty soon he’z all flopped on his back, lookin much like *dis* kitteh. Den wen u stopz de petts to go do anyfing elses, he looks all hurt-feelers at u.
Iz slut-kitty wif NO dignittee!
But SO floofy-pettable! an soft liek rabbitt fur!
I has a tummeez!
Iz a rulez: If you has a big white floofy belleh you must show it offs! Waybackmachinezcloudycat was a BIG girl with a BIG white tummeh which she dzplayzed at any and all opportunatees, but itz wuz daffynyteleez not to be toucheded unlesses you had no furzer uses for dat handz.
Ohhhh no you don’t. Fool me once, shame on you, fool me thirty-four times, shame on ME!
Mai Blue kitteh duz dis. No pointy endz, tho. I fink he lieks teh snorgles much as I do. Him is full of much luffs and floof. Was street kitteh — nao he’s mai howse kitteh. I fink he is grateful for warm bed, snorgles and (mostly) Fansee Feest ebry mornin.
Awww…ah allwuhs lubs teh street to howse suksess storehs….yay for dat sweet kitteh!
If yu cud see his eies they wud look like litul X’s
I can acts in low budgit cowsboy movie? Kitteh was just shot, grabbd chest, did summersalt off of da seloon. Lands on cushy bed.
Emerjensee tummy pat iz rekwired
Evree kitteh mus hav reckamendid dalee alowins ov tummy pats
Lack ov de rubs is knowne to coz wifdrawels
Such az we see heer
That’s so wrong!
invisible gynecologist
mai ebryfing, let me sho u it.
Mai blood runz cold
mai memry haz jus been sold
angel in a cntrfold,
mai angel in a cntrfold.
na, na, na na na na… eeeeeerwurm alerrrrrrt
Kitteh landed buttered side down.
There goes the “alwaes-on-ther-feets” myth.
To me it looks more like…..
Invisible Missionary
I love this web site! I have a cat that beats up on dogs, she is the Boss here!
Kitteh ish free flowin and wild, but also lurvin it!
I’m waiting for a human!!!
[...] n afterwurdz. u may rub mah belly. [...]
Try to rub either of my cat’s bellies, and they’ll bite and scratch.
U want 2 burry mah nose in his belleh and he will keep meh the warms
Invisible beer barrel
[...] after dis, yoo can rub mai belleh. [...]
Just do it… NOW!!!