Comments on: dont fart, pleez

By: FetzlsMom

FetzlsMom — Wed, 08 Apr 2009 17:51:24 +0000

Mah kitteh yoosed to dutch oven me. Kitteh fartz iz da wurst!!!
Ah miss hurr

By: .:Joe Man:.

.:Joe Man:. — Tue, 25 Nov 2008 17:38:03 +0000

how bout spanish uvun?

By: Et Tut Mien Spiet!

Et Tut Mien Spiet! — Thu, 17 Jan 2008 17:53:56 +0000

Spriken Ze deuctsh, ya?

By: jennywoo

jennywoo — Sat, 20 Oct 2007 05:25:43 +0000

the Diet of Worms isn’t about eating worms. A Diet was/is an ecclesiastical parliament and Worms (pr. Verms) was where they met hence the Diet of Worms, just like Treaty of Versailles.
I drive the History Truck. Anyone want a ride?

By: BorisEvenWorse

BorisEvenWorse — Thu, 13 Sep 2007 07:43:08 +0000

“Hay! U sayd this fevver bed — it not, it bag from rox! I is squishered!! HALP!!1!”

By: BorisEvenWorse

BorisEvenWorse — Thu, 13 Sep 2007 07:29:42 +0000

This are onlee Duch Oven I ever heared of. Is many more nicer than fard oven.

And also 5 bergurs for “so-sigh-ity fur crate-ive archon-isms”; is many funnee.

By: mystique

mystique — Wed, 12 Sep 2007 14:41:54 +0000

WOT?? Doze waz u tozes??? Ah fowt dey waz snausagez!

By: mystique

mystique — Wed, 12 Sep 2007 14:35:48 +0000

Oh hai, founded yer lost stamp…

By: mystique

mystique — Wed, 12 Sep 2007 14:34:36 +0000

Oh hai…dis nawt tunnelz tu chyna??

By: mystique

mystique — Wed, 12 Sep 2007 14:31:30 +0000

Ah tellz u we dun fartzes! Dah Poop Fairy comes n taykes eet awai in lil sattin bagz!

(joo do has to admit eez funneh storee butt hubbeh wud totallee be aun dah cou…cooo…kouc…sofa for a coupleh daze aftr repeetzin diz storee av slanderz!

By: mystique

mystique — Wed, 12 Sep 2007 14:21:40 +0000

TAKE MAH HAND!!!1!

By: mystique

mystique — Wed, 12 Sep 2007 14:02:58 +0000

Pls 2 b notin dat gals NEBER EBER EBER FOREBER NEBER gives dah “shy farter” permischaunz tu juss let dem rip…mah hubbeh was lyke Cottleston Pie’s, wud always run to baffroom tu letz owt dem tooterz…den Ah sed “Iz okeh honee, Ah wuv oo no matterz wot u do.” Nao Ah has realized, dat boi fartzes NAWT lyke gurl floofies (btw Ah has convinced dah hubbeh dat gurls dun toot, dat dey has wot eez known az dah Poop Fairy who caum n tayke eet awai in lil sattin bagz…but dat whole udder storee)…bois muss has some sort uv nukl…nucl…nullkee…atomic combustion in demz bowelz to has such powerful PLEH… So dun eber let dem do dis ladeez! Joo can neber get dem to go bak!!

By: ozzy mandius

ozzy mandius — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 18:42:44 +0000

I maided u cheezburgers in teh Dutch Oven … but I eated them.

By: ExZonieKitteh

ExZonieKitteh — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 16:57:40 +0000

Mai kitteh Sandi plaes wif toesies an attax an bytes dem if u muv 2 much. U waik up wif her bytin hard on 2 yur big tow. Owwee!

By: Jennifffuurrr

Jennifffuurrr — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 16:54:53 +0000

Beenz, beenz, teh musicle froot…

One of my favorite lines from John Irving’s “Hotel New Hampshire” is when Franny says “You’re as queer as a cat fart!”

By: SJ

SJ — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 16:42:48 +0000

Had kitteh wunce who sneeeekled into teh bedroom when you wuz sleepin an settled down on ur hed. So u wakes up in teh mawnin face fullov cat butt. Waz not so gret, ackshully. In Soviet Russia (well, Hampshire – is close) Kitteh Fart on You!!

By: DevilBunnies

DevilBunnies — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 16:16:35 +0000

Agreed. Iz much more funnah than anyfing Eye wood have sayd.

By: yer mom

yer mom — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 15:33:41 +0000

i has a dutch oven in mah kitzhen

By: kamie

kamie — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 14:58:14 +0000

khi! iz tuf to crawlz out but nize 2 see u.

By: jellybeansmom

jellybeansmom — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 13:33:17 +0000

Jellybean used to like to sleep on my back with his head on my butt until one night we had chili for dinner.

I had fallen asleep and my fiance was reading, Jellybean was in his normal position when all of a sudden I was awoken by the cat pouncing on my butt with full claw action.

My fiance says I had farted (obviously lies since I am a lady and we have no gas) and the cat freaked out and attacked the noise.

He still tells everyone we meet this story…. maybe I don’t need to get married after all …

By: Antoinette

Antoinette — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 12:11:43 +0000

U rool! Iz poime of much win and grateness!

By: Antoinette

Antoinette — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 12:08:29 +0000

In da yooniverse, kitteh poots be full of power and pleh. Goggie poots be eben moar.

By: Antoinette

Antoinette — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 12:03:46 +0000

Wow, history and fart jokes. Who says the intertubes aren’t edumacayshunal?

By: Zutto

Zutto — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 10:54:14 +0000

See mah hubby, he pullz his comforter oveh his head to PROTECT from teh fumes. Ah always saz no and pullz it awah though…

By: Jude

Jude — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 10:05:53 +0000

Yoo laky grl!
ackshooly, we tihnk pharting r teh phunnie. we alweyz trai 2 outdo each udder in mock indignayshun wen teh othr wun lets 1 go. but we wudnt go as far as pulling teh covr on teh oder wunz hed. dat r nasty.
prolly 2 much info, sry.

By: Jude

Jude — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 09:53:39 +0000

In fact, Martin Loother wonce sayd dat he alweyz started teh moarnin wiht a prayur an a good fart becauz dat chaysd teh devul faaar awai.
(Ai shud know, I r Lootherun an ai studdyed thiolojee.)
He were a most phunneh karikter, M. L. was. Wud moast sertinly hav apeer… apray… laikd lolkittehs, had tehy eggzisted at hiz tym.

By: paws4thot

paws4thot — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 09:18:10 +0000

Ah tink he trnd left @ Albukirky.

By: paws4thot

paws4thot — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 08:28:24 +0000

I’ll usually suggest going Dutch on a first date, but that’s to do with removing any sense of obligement that either party might feel if paid for.

By: paws4thot

paws4thot — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 08:24:23 +0000

Which were neither cvil, nor, indeed, confined to England.

By: Reese Tora

Reese Tora — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 08:17:55 +0000

in campin turms, we calls a duch oven da metul put wif metal lid dat yoo kin put fulla all sorts a fuds and bury in coals to cook

is kinda like da litre box, onlee yoo wanna dig up aferwards, and is very NOT pleh

most stores sell wif plastic handul on leed, will melt under coals, so onlee use in reglar oven… is not so great, akchooly

mah seestr, she get her specheel wun maid wif thentic cast i-urn offa speshal deel frum bulk store, thentic, so she get her havin to oil it afta use an’ all… she use her it fur so-sigh-ity fur crate-ive archon-isms, tu be cukin in da war camps

By: cat butt squirrel butt

cat butt squirrel butt — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 06:56:05 +0000

TJ! 2 kewt!! Dat grate storee!! Funnee it tayk hims free daze afor he wud gets bak on bed.

By: Jack Deth

Jack Deth — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 05:02:52 +0000

Bayje Kitteh haz a
fing for beeg, fluffee pilloz.
Maydz 4 raynee Dayz

Kanz eever klymz up
orz krawlz unner. Tho unner iz
sumtymez bettah

Bayje Kitteh allso
Toez Mawnstur. Waytz payshuntlee
4z unwayree prey

Jack.

By: Jeanie

Jeanie — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 04:51:41 +0000

ai nebber new dey had a name foar it, eether. but iz wai ai diborced frum frist husbnd.

By: Chairman Meow

Chairman Meow — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 04:48:08 +0000

must tell story.

TJ (as in TJ Hooker, cause he likes to put his hooks/claws into you) was on top of covers while I was trying to sleep. I was very relaxed. He heard the noise. It kinda shocked him a little, til he figured out it wasnt a mouse. He laid back down to go to sleep. About 10 seconds later after the smell had crept thru the covers, he jumps up and starts trying to cover up the invisible mess. It was almost like he had thought it was his. He had a look of absolute horror on his face. After a couple of seconds of furious scratching, to try and bury it, he gave up and ran off. Took him about 3 nights before he would sleep on the bed again. I had stopped laughing by that time.

By: mystique

mystique — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 04:20:59 +0000

Dah dutchez ovenz eez old childhud torturez devicez of dah ebil (n most often boi kynd)…dey frow blankie ober u so u r TRAPPED den deh let a floofeh rotten egg in dare n holded joo down so joo has to be gaspin n inhalin dis noxous gassez…

Ah had free brudders n two male cousins – was often on horrid end of dis DO NOT WANT!!!1!

By: typingisnotactivism

typingisnotactivism — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 03:32:03 +0000

ai tink he likded a funnee stamp agin.

By: teenie

teenie — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 02:05:50 +0000

u myte get a guud wun lyke I did…he goez inna bafruum tu fart acuz hiz daddy teecht him yu dont fart in front uv a ladee…nebr mynd dat I let em rip alla tyme, he stil goez inna bafruum…is teh phunnee!

By: JanetCanHas4Kittehz

JanetCanHas4Kittehz — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 01:39:08 +0000

Hoo noo?

By: Pittypat

Pittypat — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 00:51:19 +0000

ok now tmi but are u a man cuz i’m having a leeetle trubble with the cats-on-boobs thing.

By: stend

stend — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 00:41:08 +0000

in soviet russia, dutch oven has YOU !!!

By: stend

stend — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 00:38:22 +0000

INTERESTING

By: The Crapture

The Crapture — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 00:34:11 +0000

during the cooler months, my Shadow likes to get under the covers and wedge herself in between my arm and my ribcage…basically in my armpit…good thing i have decent hygiene or she would be one funked out kitteh

My bratty baby Tonya usually parks herself on my chest in Sphinx position and purrs loudly but doesn’t like being covered unless the room is a little too cold, only time i don’t totally enjoy it is when both of them get so content with the situation that they both start kneading their claws into me. but i let them do it because, hey if mah kittehs are happy, then rly, so am i (even if a litl uncomfortable)

By: stend

stend — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 00:25:02 +0000

better example, probably not safe for work

http://www.artmetropole.com/index.cfm?
fuseaction=shop.FA_dsp_browse_details
&InventoryUnitsID=13db48d3-9845-41d8-9527
-6de60bb6dbf5&CategoryID=&sale=&new=1

By: stend

stend — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 00:18:49 +0000

well, at least we’ll have company

… you should hear some of the riffs that come up in my REAL life – there’s a site I wanted to link to for the ‘dutch oven’ ref, but it’s gone to flash so is now unlinkable (probably a good thing) – suffice it to say rob clarke does lots of illustrations along these lines…

http://www.paris-gay.com/liens/photos/25.jpg

By: JanetCanHas4Kittehz

JanetCanHas4Kittehz — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 00:16:05 +0000

Yay! Grate noo werd!

By: JanetCanHas4Kittehz

JanetCanHas4Kittehz — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 00:14:51 +0000

This is very true – and I did not know previously of the more “earthy” meaning of Dutch Oven. However, now that I know it – well – google in Dutch Oven for a good giggle – there’s even and International Dutch Oven Society in Utah, which really sets the imaginashun on fyre!

By: Jenny

Jenny — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 00:05:20 +0000

I was followin this mouse tunnl, n i ended up here. Did u see wich way he wnt?

By: philene

philene — Mon, 10 Sep 2007 23:52:54 +0000

teh smeller’z teh feller

By: JanetCanHas4Kittehz

JanetCanHas4Kittehz — Mon, 10 Sep 2007 23:49:47 +0000

Aklshully, D Marie, when I read through all of this again, you are teh BIIIIIIGGGG WINNNNERRRRR! Just piktchurin u goin to awl those sites, findin awl dose things – clickin and linkin – all on a Monday. And all becuz Devil Bunnies said “just pretend I said sumthing funny” – so SAMS just randomly throws in “Diet of Worms” as teh funny thing she might have said. It’s almost as funny as a good British farce.

By: Menopaws

Menopaws — Mon, 10 Sep 2007 23:49:32 +0000

Dis pikchur to gives me teh sno blindness … cant see! cant see!