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Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
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Cheezburger Network Blog
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Hey, what's with all the misspelled words?
» Learn Lolspeak — teh furst language born of teh intertubes.
Cheezburger Network Blog
Is that car stalking me?
land
sharkaudiburger-gram
Mrs. Hrgnfldnflter? Ummm…. flowrs!
SNL FTW!!! You’re that clever shark aren’t you?
No ma’am I’m a dolphin.
LUK OWT KITTEH!!! IZ TEH DOMO-KUNS!!! FLEEEEE!!!!
in soveit onion… kitteh stalks vehickel….
Soviet “Onion”???
*ahem* LOLSPEARE!
from “Troilus and Cressida,” sort of …
Mommy:
Have you seen my Audi?
Kitteh:
No, Mommy: Ur car stalks mee thru teh woodz,
Laik a stranj soul upon teh Stygian bankz
Hidden in teh treez. O, Audi, pray do nawt
Tellz Mommy dat ai stole herz keys after
Won too menny tekilaz; 4 herz will
Shurly sendz mee to bed wifowt longed-4
burgrs, nor wif teh cheez nor friez besides!
^_^
Brava! Brava, gothkitteh!!! Much LOLz!
Brava! Bravissima! Onkore plz?
I never understood Troilus and Cressida.
Can’t say this really helps anything.
trollius? did someone say troll-is-us?
no1 kalled U a troll, yet.
>app(l)aws< Bravissima GK Bravissima!
Reply from “Twelfth Night” (sorta)
In that moment was I become a lolcat,
and my desires, like fell and cruel Audis
have e’er since pursued me.
stoopid hoomins
CAR AR WANTZ CHZBRGR. KITTEH NO HAS. KITTEH AR PLAYZING LOLCRAFT. KITTEH NO HAS TIMEZ FOAR CAR. KITTEH GO MAKES QUIK TO PWN, CAR GO NO WAHRES AND WAITS FOAR TEH CHZBRGR. . . .THE CHZBRGR THAT NEBER COMES.
In dihs blasted wildurniss, 1 ting iz kleer, we R waitin, waitin 4 cheezbrgrz!
dis shal be teh titel of mah nex novel.
fank u ver much, ubringer.
somewhere, K is saying “SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN CATS RUN FREE IN CARS ??? VINDICATED AT LAST !!!”
OH YOU SO SAID IT !!!
THINK OF TEH LOLAUDIS!!!
… and for a moment I actually considered not saying it, but then I remembered both twins are evil
the attack of the floofy pink troll! GHAAARRR!!!!!!!!
If you had not said it, I would have
kitteh woz lissnin to iShuffelz clippd to teh eerz wen teh groov got too big for holding bak by teh improvyzd carrying case foar esskayping teh Hurricayn. Kitteh jumpd free acroos teh dryvrz and teh iShufflez fell off, paynfully trapping teh dryvrz bawlsak. Dryvr woz freekd by teh pain an went foar teh brayks, but kitteh woz hydng under dem coz ware teh fark else iz kitteh gonna go in a big cumfy car but undr teh brayks. Naow dryvr iz feelin lyk Lindsey Lohan at an AA after parteh wiv teh fayss awl stuk in teh ashtray.
Kitteh iz awl lyke “Wot man? dint do nuffin. Ai iz juss owt wawkin in teh woodz n shit. Ah, wot teh hell. Ai’m gettin Audi heer.”
“audi heer” ftw!!!!!!!!!!!
One more trip to the vet successfully averted!
Dah peddle discovered!
PLEASE DON’T LET YOUR CATS DRIVE CARS
…wifout a lycence
I have to admit, yesterday, on the way home from the vet with my kitty, she was crying in her carrier so I let her out in the back seat. I blocked access to the front on one side with a water bottle and kept a look out on the other side. I figured if she was going to come up front, she’d have to hop over my arm. Wrong! Little sneaky cat went under my seat and came out between my legs. That was it, kitty back in the carrier.
I dint know ur refurenz – but I think awl haz been reveeleded on “I Are Not Ur Toy.”
that doesn’t sound good. I’m kinda glad I was in LA all day and missed that thread
Oh hai…
Toonces say I looz my lisens
Toonces!
Teh driving cat–the cat that could drive a car
Mai favorit lien from those skits: “Man, this cat is all over the road!!”
Lucky the Fire Marshal Cat sez: You must park farther than 10 feet from fire hydrant. For you, a choice: an axe through your window or a whopping fat ticket. Your choice , genius.
… but how does lucky hold the axe? curse my lack of opposable thumbs !!!
Or write a ticket for that matter?.. I get asked that all the time..Naw no worries, I just the look-out…my backup peeps at the station do all the durty work for me…there they is, coming down the road now!
um, in hiz axehold?
ok, dat woz a bit rood.
butt still, kitteh butt.
Man, mi parentz r gunna KEEL me!
u is so gwounded!!!!
Dood, I noes. No cheezburgers foar a munth!
“jeez, just because I left a few paw tracks on the hood doesn’t mean you have to throw the whole car away …”
hi maytnesnzze dillholes.
Jeeves…teh car is dirtee.
Be a dear and go get a new one…
This reminded me — many years ago, I was visiting my parents. My car was parked by their side door. In the morning I came out & noticed that one of the neighborhood cats had decided to hop up on the back right corner of the car. It proceeded to stroll diagonally across my car — leaving big ole paw prints all the way. Until….it got to the left front corner where it had lost traction. Blurry-sliding-all-over-the-corner paw prints just before it had obviously slid off & onto the ground. I just had to laugh at the picture it conjured up in my head. You know the cat ended up on the ground — pretending it had ‘planned’ to do that pratfall all along.
U caint fix dis car Spicolkitteh!
My Dad is teh TeeVee repayrman.
He can has awsum set o toolz!
I can fixx it.
ur dad has “awsum set o toolz”?
toooo mutch infrmashun Mewlissa! lawl.
OMG!!! My daddeh 74. I fink himz “toolz” r prolly lil bit rustee..
HAHA! I cwack mahsef up.
r u sayin dat ur dadz toolz need oylin?
Well my mama mite needz a Tetanus shawt ifn dey gitz friskee…..
Jeff Spicoli FTW!!!
WTF a car!? Howd that get thar?
hahahahahahaha……stoopid humans never see it down there…..
This much more fun than hiding scrunchies !!!
WIN!!!!
HAHA
full of win an awsum!!!!
wow, that must’ve taken one h3lluva swat – kitty has superstrength !!! cheezburgers have paid off !!!
I sez dis 3 er 4 tymez a week…HAIR TYZ NOT 4 KITTEH! Dey nevr lissenz tho.
I tinks teh doggeh were drivin. Look ware dey stoppeded. Doggeh had to make pit stop at teh hidedrant. Kitteh, dat U stories, U stick to it.
Yeh! Teh doggie wuz drivin. Dat’s teh tikit!
FTW!
Twaffik tikit?!?!?! DO NOT WANT!!!!!!
Starter kit joke:
Why did the cat cross the roac?
Well, why? I’m only starting the joke…
To get to teh cheezburger! nomnomnomnom
****warning–langwadje advysoree****
To f*ck up some assh*le’s Audi after he parked too close to a hydrant
wait, whut’s a “roac”?
errr “road” (altho there may have been sum roaches to cross over too)
doan wurry bowt teh roach, kitteh throo it owt uv teh kar in cayce teh poleess came. ^_^
peeps don’t let der kits drive high on ‘nip
Ladies and Gentlemen.
Pleeze halp polise denteefy indvjall in pitcher.
Police say at this tiem he only a pawson ov intrest in fatal hit-n-run of blue audi.
If u hav information call toe-free 2-433-928-7437.
Dat nummer agajin is: CHEEZBURGER.
U may call anonemousely.
Annee-mowsies? Whut? Whar?
Oh hai, I chekked ur brakes foar u…
yeh, dey not so grate, aksuhly!
Parallel parking–ur doing it wrong…
check out “italian girl parking car” on utube
Pantone Kitteh says: “Teh Calico wuz rite–teh bloo does clash with teh green”
Oh hai, I aligned ur wheelz foar u…
Kitteh ackshully werks for Earl Schieb…
“I’m in ur foliated suburbs, drumming up biznezz”
Irony Kitteh says: “Ironicklee, dis car ackshully belongs to teh stoopy city counsil hoomin who voted against putting curbs in dis subdivision”
TB – R U mai naybur? We bus teh kidlets 2 skool, bcaws no hav teh sidewalkz. Bus Ride: .4 mile. If walked from mai house: .3 mile. Just how much wood sidewalkz cost? (PS, I could walk my child to school, but I could not let him walk by himself, not without risking charge of “child endangerment.”)
oooh… IRONIC KITTY SEZ :
ladies and gentlemen, I believe Turkeyburger has just created a useful new character…
Fank yoo. Ai bleev Ironic Kitteh will be maeking menny appearances in teh neer fyootchur. Haoever, we must not cornfuse him with Ironic Sofa Kitteh. Is totally different.
Obveouslee.
Ironic kitteh is ironic.
Ironic sofa kitteh points out the irony in the ironic sofa.
And ironic kitteh on ironic sofa wud be… ?
Dat wud maek teh yooniverse asplode.
I can has inshurants?
Ur Gekko…I haz it!
Ur gecko…I had it, but I eated it.
*lolz* Evun bettur!
Next, we takes owt those stoopy cavemen…
Dose stoopy cavemen don’t look very nommy, tho. Geckos be very nommy to the kitties. Kitties go nom nom nom on the geckos, and their tail stick out of kitteh’s mowf and be wigglin’ arownd. Kitteh’s mommy looks at dis and is growsed out. She exclaims: “DO NOT WANT!!!!”
Arggle!! Livin in Flowida, kitteez wuld nomm nomm leezrds all de tym, leev lidull screemin bodiless heds on de floorz. Wuz 4evr saving all pre-nomm nomm leezrds I culd. And snayks. *icks*
In America, you scam insurance. In Soviet Russia, insurance scams you!
Dood. Dat’s akshuly troo in Amerka! Hao sad!!
An in Urope.
Carjacker Cat
iz leefing seen of de crime
datz haow CJC rollz yawl!
I park here now.
Kitteh nawt “Toonses”
No canz dribe t3h beeg Weelee
Bawkz awllz bie himzself
No can reech peddulz
awn t3h floar andz seez ober
t3h dash at saymz tyme
Beeg Weelee bawkz iz
mooveeng! Treez getteeng kloaser!
Kitteh leepz away
Jack.
Jack, u rool.
Lance Briggz Cat
iz repoorting car mizzing
CHEEEEEEEEEEZ, TOFUUUUU, Halps!
Dis pooter eatin mai kumentz! It hurted ma feelinz! Wonky thing! U fix plz?
kthxbai
PS It be flippen mai Komments to nother, differnt picture too. Dis not teh pictur wher I putz mai kommentz.Wonky thing!
aieeeee!!!
Kitteh hads tew mutsh meelk
Ran smack inter chree
Okey i iz askaping befour de kopses get heer
Stay out of the catnip kitty… sniffin and drivin don’t mix
Deep within the Virginia jungles, owr anglers wait, hiddin in teh trees. Wun uv dem has keerfully playsed a neber-fail loor fur teh eloosive Tabbehbutted Smoovbak. Sven Horssak, teh leeder uv owr expa… expa… wud-be snorglers swares teh bloo Awwdi alwaiz draws teh Tabbehbutt, but dat teh sekrit to ackshulee trapping teh waree creetur iz to put a cuppl cheezburgers awn teh front seet an leev teh window open.
“Iz nawt alwaiz snorgles an smoo,” Horssak sed, lukkin bleery-eid. “Wunz, we loored a lion heer insted, an we awl hads to get in teh car rly rly fast.”
Exulunt!! Wen this be on teh Animal Planut Channul?
TOONCES!!!!
Jezus kraist, itz a car! Get in the lion!
Wait, wut?
u in soviet russia maybe?
LOL! Awsum! Much like!
I wernt drivin. I jst hir 2 tell U Uyou hav less than fur hurs to liv. peas Oscar
Hey! I did pritty gud job ov parkin – in teh shade, off teh rode, missed teh fyur hidrunt an everthing.
How yu get it owt?
Not mah problum.
Next Time, Mah Pads Tries to Reach Brakes… But Don’t Count on Itz…..
Is didnt do it.
Stoopy kaar goway! Mai momeh wont keepz u ebben if u fahlow mee home! Wut on erth wud shee wunt wit a bran new Audi?
Nao u tells me u cant reach teh brakes. I can has AAA?
Oh noes, luks like Paris Hiltun’z vizitin again….
“I’z legul profeshunl, arrowbix instruktor, teechur, akyupunchurist and semi-profeshunul bowler, evry yeer teh entire population of teh wurld is kilt three tiems ovur when peepul let kittehs driev ther kars.
Kittehs ar not gud dezygnayted drievurs, dey kant reech teh pedulz, oar dey gets stuk under teh pedulz, also dey tend to veer unkontrolably when teihr inurest is kot by teh shinee objektz.
is hartbreking to witnis teh karnij infliktd by kittehs whut is not kwalifyd to awpurrayt teh moter veyiklz
donut do dis
PLZ DONUT DO DIS”
DA DOG, DID YA GIT THE DOG!!?
Kitteh tinkin : Whoo iz Linzee Lowhan en whai iz shee aftr mee?!
Nice Audi….what model is it?
[...] dis teh line for the driving test… plz. cats r not gud drivers [...]
Toonces?
datz a nise kar
[...] drivers ed, I no haz dem. [...]
[...] unfortunately, when kitteh drive, no brakes can be reached. [...]
o, fer da dog dey stop.
but Iz dey jus kicks outta kar.
[...] kittehs nawt sew gud at drivin. [...]
kittehs under substinc influinc shud nawt bi drivin! dey be law- brakerz, and car brakers, but naw braking the car!
Invisibul Driveway…
I can haz found it?
Uh oh… kitteh needz stiltz 2 reech peddels.
cat says “Okay, lesson learned. Cats cant drive.”