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Ur flor…Eye vakoomz it!
Yay! Eye iz teh furst wun to kommintz!
that’s why they call me – eureka !!! (like the vaccume)
OH! U saw what i was doin there?
I has answer to solved all the worlds problems… but i ar gonna take a nap, brb.
42
Yes!!! Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy – WIN!!!! Deep Thought shud hve been a kitteh!!!
wut r teh answer to diz queshun?
it r caturday, meebo time, but no lolfrenz in meebo. wai be dat ?
hay yvi-kitteh, wear u bin? welcum bac!
haha, fanku 3rin. I was sick foar a long time. (nao sick again)
and then i gotz sucked into teh SIMS universe!! HALP! lol
female + simz + free downloads of clothing, furniture, wallpaperz etc foar sims = recipee foar desaster!
Fanks to mah knowlidj of quantum fizziks, I has discuverd equayshun to calculate dimenshuns of kitteh floofiness. Quick, bring me mah minion wif da opposable thumbs so he can writez it down!
I can has toyz frum unner da stove, plz? See em? behine dat dus bunnee.
archimedes kitteh discuvvers density uv da cheezburger bai puttin it in tub uv watur, an mezurin watur b4 an aftur. kitteh uzes volume to determinez da density, an crys: “EUREKA!”
dats won smart kitteh.
Now kitteh’s cheezburger all soggy an’ endelible.
nonono, teh cheezburger mus be rapped firs. it displayse same mount of whater. tehn u eats teh cheezburger.
I thot yooreeka meant “Kwik, han me a towl!”
——
I NOES Yreka iz a playc in NoCal….
Ur cheezburgers. I has discuverd them.
Not “My”reeka. Ai takes baff diz mornin. mebbe “U” reeka; think mebbe sumwun been sprayin furniture aginz!
if u see above, is “Y”reeka. is nu hibrid kitteh wat luvs a baf.
Or mebbe “Y”reeka, a new kitteh colone?
Y reeka when U kin smell lak a cheezburga!!!!!
Te spirit has descended upon me an I am its profit.
Epiphany wud be a great name for a kitteh.
Yeah, I had such an epiphany a number of years ago. It was “Oh Noes! I has teh allergeez to teh kittehs! GREAT GOOGLY MOOGLY, MAH EYEZ! WHUT IS WRONG WIT MAH EYEZ! MUST CLAW DEM OWT AND WASH DEM RITE NAO!!”
Not so grate an epiffanee, akshully…
“U don’t-a smella so gud urself!” (groan)
HA! (groan)
ZOMG, it all maeks sense to mee nao! Kittehs…by teh gas pedals…maeks teh car zoom out of controll into teh throngz of hoominz…blood, screams, death, exploshuns, technicolor!!
Why did no one warn us of dis befoar?
kittehs bai gas “petals,” kittehs bai da stoav, kittehs runnin wit sizzers…
“don’t do this.
PLEASE, DON’T DO THIS.”
^_^
u forgots kittehs in driers.
OH NOES! UR RITE, I DID FORGETS TEH KITTEH IN TEH DRIER! Dat’s whut dat thumping sound I been heering is!
Speaking of teh running wit teh sizzers, has annywun else seen dese pics going around nao of teh kid with teh fork shoved up his noze?
u meen THROO hiz noze? ai saw, but ai wantz to furgetz…
it iz inkrediblee awfull uv yawl 2 eben menshun kittehs in driers or kidz wit forx up dere nozes. whut if a kitteh reeds this an desides 2 eet a forx! or sumthin! “you don’t like the point i made, too bad.” u r jus nawt responsibull kitteh parintz AN U SHUD AWL JUST B SHOT CUZ U R SEW EEVUL AI HATEZ EVRYWON XCEP MAISELF BLAH BLAH BLAH!!!!!
“DON’T DO THIS.
Please don’t do this.” (i think dis will b mai noo sign-off. ^_^ )
that sign-off has teh win.
OMG!! Paruss Hiltun rilly IS a Stoopy lil Ho…
heer all dis tiem I thot it wuz teh acting…
you know, I think my most favoritest of all lolwords is “stoopy”. Every time I see it I crack up!!
mine is “skwirl.” ai darez ennywon 2 readz it widdout smylin. ^_^
I like Tina’s “Hugh Manatee.” I just wish I’d thought of it first!
U kin be fankin me for dat werd. Akshuly, One of my friend’s Kid is responsible. When she was little, and in kinnygarten, her school was diverse on the latino side.
The little latino kids, Y’know how kids are. Mean. Well they would call each other
“stupido” and she couldn’t say it it always came out stupello, which got shortened to stoopy. I lurve it too,And the way the word soft spelled lolspeek, “sawft.”
[ahem]
“ass pie”
[uncontrollable snickering]
[...]
[hiccup]
lolz..caint forgitz teh ass pie!!!!
Iz awppuzit uv Ass Hat?
nots nesisarilee
Yreeka! Dis giant metal bocks, it holdz awl teh ingreedeemints 4 teh cheezburgers!!!
Nao . . . if I can jes figgur owt howta turn on da stoav wiffout posable thumz . . .
We innerukt deez LOLs foar a portent Publik Servis Nounsment:
Childruns and kittehs must nebber oparayt teh stoav on dere own. Rasponsabull soupavizhn bes rakwyrd at AHL time.
We nao returnz u to ur regalr ichc to enjoi da rest ob da LOLz
*ahem*
RASPONSABULL suuepervishun she sayd. Dat meeens not u!
Teh joke. Ai doan gettit.
Or mebbe teh self-deprecating joking Publik Servis Nounsments, u doan gets dem?
kitisitr, keep up teh gud werk!!! I luz yur PSA’s!!
i sowwy, kitisitr-dat wus supos to be joek in reespons to ur PSA-i lieks does PSAs, dont stop. jus sayin dat whuefr reedin wusnt reesponsible enuf to luk after kittehs.
Dis kittah be looking fur mouz. I knows it. Dis be wondurrful moment wen kittah spotz mousie aftur lon wayt.
My kittah caught lil mouzie today, dis be good Caturday fur her, bad caturday for me…but iz ok, coz mouzie run away, kittah not kill it, juz play wif it…
OH NOES!!! I sees the mouzies again…iz scarrred…any lolfrenz help kittah catch mousie? I no want mouzie in apartment, iz gross. I’m skayrred
But mousie is educamated rodent, he be sitting on top of Tolstoy buk aktually…lulz?
U cans buy humayne trap at prolly enny chain home improovmint stoar. Dey iz purty cheep n u cans releez da mowsie into a feeld far far awais frum ur partmint.
Altho… Tolstoi mowsie… u nawt be findin doz ebry dai… mite b gud to keep arown fur da intallekshool conbursashuns awn da lawng wintur nites, wen kitteh’s bizzy snoozin in frunt uv teh spase heetur.
But i iz beeg fan uv rooshan lit so iz beein a littul byased.
Hhmm, i lives in NYC, it be no wyld feelds here LOL…So mausetrap iz ok? Kittah no get pawz and fayze stuck in mouze trap? Mouzie be riily, riily teeny, lyk less dan two eenches long…afturr struggle wif kittah, mouzie knows all about War and Peace now LOL
. . . or war and meese, or teh def of ivanna lil scritch, or anna kareeningmouse.
sted uv bein teh deth chamburz, teh hyoomane wunz ar lyk littul vakayshun condoez. he goez in, he fyndz is nawt so grate but he stais fur a bit ennyway cuz doar iz stuck. iz ok bcuz he has tastee pnutz budders to eet, dat loored himz in der. doan fink teh kitteh wud get himzself stucked.
u cud letz him owt in centrul park!
um… ur sumfin. teh brooklyn zoo, purrhapz?
Umm, u might wanna check local ordinances befoar u go releasing any critters ennywhere…
Blarrrg!! OH NOES, I has gone thru Hulk-liek transformation into a legal profeshinul troll!! Blaarrrr!!
Long story short, I just found out that legally, in most places certain types of critters that are live-trapped have to be destroyed. Because of their excessive population size or predisposition to carry disease, u r not allowd to release them in new areas.
Just thot I wud give u teh hedz up so u don’t get the huge fine or teh jailz for something liek releasing a mowsie…
Blarrr! I has morphed bak into TB (nr) nao. Kthxbai.
OH NOES!!!!! u has prooved uz to bes inteeyjent responsable adults. Wen eberybody noes we r jus stoopy hos. (sept Stend, who iz a stoopy pink troll)
TB – this is a mouse in NYC. just take it into the subway…
but if ya got one mouse, you got several. anybody wanna hear my NYC rat story?
Wee live en a secondairy burb of miniappless, and we gets vols, srews, and mani mani field mowsies,(because the lots on eiver side ov us r fields) annaway…. we lets our youngun kittehs out foar a feu howrs evry dai to get .. um…”squeaky treats”
(an affor I get attaked bai publk servce anuncers: we have quarterly vet checks and do use tic sqeasys. teh cats get exrcises, and we gets tomatos and lettuces an ovvr green foods.)
My 9 yr ol daughter was watchin teh over day and she says” aaawwwww… dai so kute wehn dey chewing teh heds off.” dats mai grrl!
u gotta noo yoark rat story? how … big … WUZ IT? (i iz skared 2 no.)
k stend, wut’s ur NYC rat storee? i has wun too, but it’s nawt dat grate, ackshulee.
Yah, realease teh mowsies down in teh subway–da ratz needs somfin to eats…
howevah u git rid uv current mowsie, mai suggestshon fur teh future is hardware cloth – liek window screen but tuffer wit bigger holes. Den, u put dis stuf under ur ac vents, across ur dryer vent, ennywher mowsie mite git insyde. Ive seen mowsies wriggle thru reely little openings liek mai flor vent loovers. U ken uz steel wool in teh openings wher cabuls com insyde. Den u need to wear dust mask an vacuum reely gud and spritz teh areas u find teh droppins wit bleach-water. Also, to be takin ur pets elsewher and doin teh bug bomb thingy. eben edumacated rodents bringz tigs insyde wit dem.
dis some dam good adfise, DM.
finding teh openings dat a mowsie can get in is rilly hard. Because of teh way der little mowsie skeletons is built, a mowsie can get it’s whole boddy thru any opening dat dey can fit der little mowsie hedz thru. Don’t let teh size of der mowzie boddys fool u. Pleez don’t do this… DO NOT DO THIS! (snicker)
Whatever way you choose to catch mousie – use peanut butter as bait – not cheez(burger). It’s hard for them to steal it without setting off the trap, it smells less AND mousies like it BEST!! (I iz furmr syke major n hadz wots uv rats & udder rodencse. Nao iz hab rodencze catchurs!)
I wunce used teh cheeto’z (teh puffy kind, not teh crunchy wunz) to catch a mowsie…wurked much better than teh pretzel…
I went to high school in Yreka.
Tim- ai awaz wundered, is it pronownced “Why-reeka” or “Yur-eeka”?
Mai granparintz libbed in Ukiah, an ai awaz teezed dem by callin it “Ooh-kiah.”
Why-reeka.
Eureka (Yur-eeka) is on the coast.
Damn dat fl00r is teh kleen eben unner teh stobe. U wanna come kleen mah floor?
Dey must have had dat extra-floofy kitteh from a few posts back come clean teh florz…
I say dis werd when I find sumthin. “Yreeka! I findz it!”
I has diskubered noo way ta convirt cheezburgers inta enarjee effishent fyool fer kar
Iz waitin fer Nobell Prys
Wil aksep cheezburgers.
Holee CRAP. Dat’s teh biggest chzburgr I’b eber seen!!!!! …um, u needz sum halp eetin dat? Cuz u noes I iz heer fur u.
yase sillyannz u can has cheezburger!!!
Plz not 2 drip greese an cheez bitz on floar… drip dem in mai mouf insted!
knock knock!
hoo ver?
ur dirt hoo.
ur dirt hoo hoo?
(ur) eek! a (dirt) devil (hoo) ver!
dwa dwa dwa dwaaaaaah
i see what ur doin there
Kitteh surchez 4
eeloosiv shynee deevyss
Fawloweeng itz spoor
Sweet scent in t3h ayr
Az lyte spawrkulz in shaddoz
unner Beeg Lawng Chayr
Iz nawt Duss Bunnee
Kitteh pownses enneeway
Instinkkz rewarded
Pray slippz froo clutcheeng
pawz. Dredded Kandee Rapper
eckskaypz eckstinkkshun
Jack.
LOLz “eckstinkkshun!”
btw, j.d., u must hav da klarevoiyantz — u menshun “yureeka” yesturdai, an hear it b 2 dai!
i can has forchun?
Hi, gothkitteh:
U haz t3h lawng Luv an Lyfe lynz. U beez sooperb Mommy 2 menny bebbeez, boaf Furr an Peenk.
Doant cownt the syllabilz wen U rytz poetree. Jus let it floez frum Urz brayn 2 Urz fingurz.
Jack.
LOLOL!!!1!1!!!! ^_^
kitteh has just diskuvvurd teh sekrit uv ovurcommin himz lack uv opposabul thumbs.
“at last… teh wurld is myn!!!1!”
ideuz, I has dem.
U hipnoetiz kitteh wif cheezburgers.
Kitteh mowf watrz.
???
guyz, lisen. I knoz how to maek cheezburger. All i needz is a cow, and som1z who make bread. and cheez. that wat cowz for.
Cow = burger AND cheez! (Cheez furst, ai tink…)
zactly
zactly.
SPHINX KITTEH sayz, ” I has riddel for U.
Whut gowz on da 4 harbles in mornin den on 2 at nooown, an on tree in da ebening?
oedipus ref ftw!!! much winz!!!!
“It’s…
…..beautiful!”
OMGWTF!!11! hoo putted teht lait bulb tehr?!
__???
Yreeka, I’s founded preznt in behin’ cowch.
I left it behin’ thar in firs place, though. is not so great, actooly.
Yah reekah yerself!
*GASP* Teh mikrowaiv!! I can cook tings in teh microwaiv widout opposabul thumz!!
Sauron kitteh wants to get the little hobitses.
carol-ann walk away from the light!!!!
Den, teh kitteh’s lookded out teh car doar windoe, en dere, hangding off teh handul, WAS A HOOK!
cownsulr kitteh tellz urbin lejinz.
dat stowy scared me sew mutch win i wuz a lietle kid. Dat breengs bac memrees!
No Wai…. Ur freakin kiddin me….. right?
I haz fownd da sekwet catnip recipe!
isnt dat a place in california?
lawl