Ohz Noz, not another big kitty!! Teh fatness must ssttoooppppp!!

I Iz supersized

Anuvver two inchez and I’z bee zumo kittah

At least this kitteh hasn’t got fatrolls in his face. He’s got like normal face, normal feets, normal tail…. GIANT BELLEH…..

LOLZ I knew a guy whose mom had a 40-pound kitteh…. the thing was like an ottoman. Kitteh wuz ginormous.

Having said that, see mah pozts on othar kitteh-pic about why kitteh iz so unhelfy.

“…I EATED THE CAT WITH THE 23″ WEIGHST.”

I afraid I eated it in one bite. Now Kate Moss kitty wants back out. =.=

lol @ yvi

Aw! It lookz like a momma kitteh.

The interwebs told me the Guiness Book of World Records stopped accepting/publishing submissions for fattest/biggest cats, because they was worried hoomans would be stupid and stuff their poor helpless kittehs. Its just cruel to inflict diabeetus, heart diseases, and a whole long list of maladies that go along with the poor kittehs being forced to get so bigs.

*gets off soapbox*

*gets back to work*

“I has indegestyons”
Poor fat, fat kitteh.

Dis Amurika, peepl … lots fatt, includin’ kittahs. Wee know wak … wee wadl.

I kno Ah does wadl. I meen, I wadld wers bafor I ztartid gud-hard exerzysisings … nowe I wadl lez, but i no do exurzysisings laytely kuz ov mah surgary on mah noze (dem sayez no!! fur 10 daysis!) but I git mah lardbuttz bak to da stoodyo ons Katurday, git mah butt bak on trak.

I eetid too mush Zonik Larj Banunaz kreempye Zhak wif Oroz Kookyz, I iz afrayd. Dem is LUFFZ, and Zonik, u kno, u juz driiiiive thru an’ dem bryng u da yummuz rite to your karz…

Chubbeh kitteh bebbys r kaused by us hoomanz mostly. shame on alla us. food iz NOT luv, peeps!

^ yeah but look at his eyes. He’s been using mind tricks!

ZOMG - Kitteh iz to be lookinz lik my Newman’s daddeh, only still not so big az daddeh Floyd. Daddeh kat wuz HUUGGE! But sweet boy he wuz.

nige, I no fink dat’s mind trix. I fink datz “shutz up abowt mah flubbuz kittipooch or ah eetz ur fambly, too. Don’t fink I won’t.”

Ppl finks dat u gitz a kitteh, u feedz it da bag ov kitteh foodz frum da stor. Ppl not realiz dat kittiz iz a lot lyke hoominz… if we hoominz just ated da bag ov hoomin foodz frum da stor, den mah stok in freetoh-layz wud be werf MILLINZ, but mah helf insherins be too much munneh.

Look! I has wayst leik kate moss an pete doherty togeffer.

elfinugget, i’s dos noze (ha!) deh skor … wif mee iz deh cheezburgahs an deh choklat … u don bee messin wit mah coklat, know sur!

Hop noze betteh … u mus tawk lik dis al thyme! Soree … know mo jok bout nozes, k?

Fat kitty pictures make me really sad.

I had to bring things down, but kitties get fat because their owners let them, and it’s not funny. Yes, I know that it’s sometimes hard to keep your kitties healthy, but using their poor health for amusement is irresponsible, and encourages kitty obesity.

Is sad.

(my other post should say “I hate to bring things down”…

I should proofread.

Another idiot owner who should be shot for animal cruelty.

“We not all supposta luk liek supermoddlez u kno! Real kittehs hav kurrvs!”

(kitteh just makin excuses to eat more cheezburgers)

elfinugget, ai noze whut u meen. doze restrawntz whut letz u driiiiive into demz r teh shizzle! taeks dubble + willpowrz to drive past n all u heerz is frenchifriz zayin, nooo! do not drive past! iz hard wrk!

Get dat dere kitteh a salat! Dwessin on da sides! An NO Cwootons! Mebee little toona on top? Still needs you pwoteens.

Elfinugget….nice to no yu de one gittin alla mah Frito monnies!!!

LOLZ Wellz I been doin’ big errinds, too… I bin all fokusd and do lotz of stuffs… I goze to da anteek ztorz an’ tryz to sell my old krapz bakuz I needs munneh for zkools… den all-suddin I lyk… wtf, I hongree? Den I rillyzez, I no eetid all daye, I ztarfins, myte diez. Den I git all lyke mah kittiz: “ZOMGZ MUMMA WE IZ WILTERINGZ FRUM DA HUNGARZ!!” Den I finks… heyyyyyy der a Zonik on da wayz hoam….. And den it awl ovar. *SIGHS*

elfinugget, u ar full uv win!!!

I wuz wondrin’ wher mah pillow went.

I has a fat cat, and its nothing that i’ve done, or MADE. She’s a fat cat…she’s also 14…she’s taken to the vet regularly, exercises both on her own and with me, she does not overeat, and is fed proper food. Just because a cat is fat DOES NOT MEAN IT HAS A IRRESPONSIBLE OWNER.

my fattest cats have always lived the longest!

all her fatness here:
http://www.twoluvcats.com/fatbink.jpg

I wint to koledge wit a ladee whoz daddee invented deh dryve-up window. Iz true!!!
He livd on deh royalitees. But I done tink hee new it wuld leed to lazee fud deliveree
systims and makes us all fat. We drivez thru fore owr fud and owr coffee dreenks and
owr bankin needz and we noze (hai to Elfinugget!) walkz no moar. Iz sad. I haz also
becum victim of dis nefayrius plot. So now I walkz insyde on lolhamstar trak.
Iz da wurst. Iz BORING. I can not even reedz wile I walks. Iz sad but iz my own falt.
So now I has to suffer all becuze of Susan’s daddee……( ; hehehehe Oh, Wayt, maybee
iz NOT my fault. I feelz bettah now. kthxbai

I’m with you, Amanda. Good on you for daring to break out of lolcatsspeak and take a stand.

There are so many diseases we’ve not yet learned to prevent (or cure) in humans and in other animals. Why not reduce the risk of heart attack, stroke and diabetes by eating a sensible diet and getting regular exercise? Why not do the same for the kittehs? It’s totally do-able, and totally worth it.

Take care of your kittehs, peeps. They don’t deserve the diabeetus.

/soapbox

wow, dis kitteh has waist big as mine!

every1 else, get teh eggbeater out ur buttz, tis is funnee! go b politickle sumware elses!

I can has Zantac? kthnxbai!

I gotz hoomanhamstartrak too - I watchez da teevee. Historeez channel. Nashnul Geografik. No prollem. March march march. An’ LERN stuf, too! Win!

Better dan outside trayl. Outside trayl walk rite neer wher teh wind blowz across street from KFC. Smell SOOOO good. Want. So stay INside.

I gotz big kitteh, too, but he no fat. He Maine Coonz kitteh. Twenty-six pound kitteh, vet sez is all good.

Ah gaves up teh chocklettes won yeer an won haff ago. Dis passted krissmass Ah has noe sweites and Ah styl gains tenn pownds. Ah’m lyk, “WTF? Ah had noe kookees r kakes r pyes r iss creem r fugge r melk shaykes r anee theng gud an Ah stil has teh gaynings uf teh waites?”

Lyf is lose.

N Ai sit un byk masheen fur twintee minuts free tymes a weak. Styl teh gaynings uf teh waites.

Yu gotta PEDAL, no just sit. *wink*

[...] When more than one person sends you “this link. [...]

This is a male cat, 13 or 14 years old, I can never remember. He’s quite upbeat and actually doesnt eat a lot of food. We’ve tried diets and they don’t work for him. By the way, he’s 30 pounds.

Snippet: OH! Pedal!! lol

when i was having of the unemploymintz (which r not as taystee az peppermintz or speermintz) i was a-riding of da bike-machine foar TWENTEE MILEZ everee…single….dayz. For TWO MONTHEZ i did this.

Knoe how many weightz I losed?

Zeero. Not NONE.
Now, i knoez i be drinking of the too much Pepsee (is baaaaaad, baaaaad ztuff) but comon, peepulz: TWENTEEE MILEZEZ! a DAY! @ 20mphes!

I’m wif CBSB. Is all utterly devoid of win.

Meenwhyle: dis kitteh makez me sad too. Carbz for kittehz = ALSO full of lose.

dat cat fat

Betchoo yu gayned leg mussles. Mussles ways mor than teh fatz.

Optimus

I have an old fat cat too! Sometimes cats are just FAT!

-twoluvcats

Every cat photo site I visit (SOMC, CO, ICHC), when a chubby kitteh photo comes up, folks feel like they must chime in with how unhealthy it is to let your cats get fat. I agree with that sentiment, but I feel like this isn’t the place for that. I like you all and enjoy your humorous comments, but I’d rather not see this turn into a forum for issues of “abuse.” We all have opinions on what constitutes abuse of animals or children, and some people include weight gain in there, but please- these are just silly photos with LOLcaptions. What’s next- warnings about the perils of turning cats into monorails?

BonzoGal: clearly u has never witnessed da deadly Monorail Cat Hed-On Collizhon.

Waz TRAJEDY. Mew EVERYWHERR.

BonzoGal: YETH u haz win.

Kitteh iz not model foar mah kittehz. Kapshun iz funneh, dat is awl.

My kittehs is gettins lots of exarzys todayez runninz away frum da evul vakoom kleenarz. Yeth, kitteh giantfat. And while kitteh diabeetuz = bad, is also possibul for kitteh to be bigger wifout being unhealthy. Kitteh diabeetuz, yeah, dat terridabul, but not all fat kittehs gots diabeetuz.

Ennywayz, me, I iz pudgasaur. I am glad I too layzee to git drezzd to go in kar to Zonik. LOLZ.

–Elfi

Sorry for the not-funnee rant, I just… LURVE THE FUNNEE! Now lets all join paws and sing kumbiya for lolcats everywherez.

The cat pictured, Moe, is mine. He is fourteen years old. I’ve had him since birth. He is indoor/outdoor and quite active for his size. He can really move.

We have never overfed him. He is fed no more than 4.5 oz. of food per day. He has access to dry food for when we’re out for long periods. He is never given table scraps. He has always been fat. Cutting his food further would result in malnutrion.

He is loved, cared for, and happy.

zadorble kitteh- warrum at nite

Jeremy,

You gots urself a kewl cat!

Oh noes! Too many cheezburgers!

If you look at the picture it’s actually 28 inches fat.

holy crap that’s a FAT CAT

You are what you eat and that cat obviously eated a big fat cat. >.>

Whoa…I just measured my waist and I’m 30 inches around, only 2 inches bigger than him. That is one fat cat!

Fat kitties are cute.

Diet. Ur doin’ it wrong.